Senior, Stop Teasing me!
To survive
“We have to come back soon to attend a meeting at school,” I said in a voice that was still hoarse because I was crying. The clock has shown at 8:30, actually there is still a lot of time left to be with my family. However, somehow my current feelings are very sad, upset and also angry. That feeling made me refuse to continue seeing them for a while, I needed some time to calm my mind.
Apriliawan just looked at me without saying anything, after saying goodbye we rushed away without seeing anyone even greeting anyone we went through.
In the car there was only silence, I tried to harden my heart so that my tears would not come out again. My eyes are pretty dull and red.
I understand and understand why my parents made this decision, our economic situation is very bad. How great our efforts are, we still have to try again and again to survive.
While our economy was in a slump, it was easy to get up if my father's family supported me and gave me a little help. But it's ironic to find that they close their eyes and leave us behind.
Knowing that I would be living alone now, away from my parents and brothers, made me feel sorry for my own life.
Even though I got a scholarship to get a free education, my parents needed to find housing and food for me. I think their spending increased as we grew. Those things made me unable to resist their departure.
“We still have time for 30 minutes before your meeting,” said Apriliawan stopped the pace of his car. I realized that we were already in the City Park, close to my hostel.
Apriliawan just developed a thin smile without asking about anything, he tried to calm me down and brought me here. We sat on a long bench near the fountain, the sun began to warm my body and made my sore eyes feel a glare.
“Sorry, we should have fun today,” I said feeling bad in Apriliawan.
“Today is quite fun, at least I can get closer to you.” I looked at Apriliawan who was smiling thinly and looking soothing, “are you feeling a little good now?” he continued while looking at me fixedly.
I avoided her gaze that began to feel even more dazzling than the sun, I threw my gaze at the blue-looking sky with thin clouds drifting slowly.
“You know, Wan? I feel that my life is more miserable than the lives of others. I needed a scholarship to continue my education, to get that scholarship I subconsciously sacrificed a best friend of mine in the past. They say that I am someone who is very lucky to always be at the top of the rankings, but in reality the rankings are like a rope that keeps snaring my lehar harder as time goes on.”
“But my effort was not enough, there are still many things to be done with money. Fate is like playing us for granted, now I have to be willing to live apart with my family,”.
“Are they going to leave in a long time?”
“Entai, no one knows until when. It could have taken more than a year or even three years until I graduated.”
“But you were lucky enough to be separated by the difference in time and distance.”
Yes, I understand the meaning behind Apriliawan's words. I was lucky enough that my family was healthy. Apriliawan's mother and father are long gone, they have calmed down in nature there, may have become stars in the sky there.
“Sometimes, but when I miss them I think that my life is not as lucky as the lives of others,” said Apriliawan. Although I know that the sentence is a sentence full of sadness in it, but somehow I feel relieved because at least my parents and sister are still in this world.
I smiled wryly, “too many ways destiny played us.”
Now I'm thinking from a different angle, maybe this is the best way right now. Someday, destiny will be tired to play us and then give us a better life. I just need to endure it a little longer and strengthen my heart and mind, there comes a time when we will gather without having to worry about anything.
“Now fix your face, you do not intend to show that moody face to other friends, right?”
“Aaah.., I should have worried about that problem before I decided to cry,” I sighed. I remembered my glasses, I immediately grabbed them in a bag and then put them on.
“Better!” apriliawan smiled warmly at me. Now that I have set my thoughts and feelings, at least I will not complain too much about my fate and refocus on what is my duty.
“Sorry can not accompany you any longer,” I said in Apriliawan.
“It's okay! There's another day. How about we go on a date next week?”
“Hahaha, okay. Let me atone for my sins today.”
Moments later, I was standing at the school gate. Apriliawan has left after dropping me off. I stared at the image of the banner that was still firmly fixed in front of the building, Reza and I could only be together on the banner.
I grabbed the hair tie that was inside the bag and then washed it a bit high, I would usually do that to my hair when I decided to wear glasses. Now I feel like a nerdy girl with cylindrical glasses bigger than my eyes. White T-shirt with jeans subordinate. I'm ready!
“Hei, Zytha! This way!” someone called out to me from the direction of a small group of six students and a teacher.
“Sorry late,” I said while saluting the teacher who will give guidance. My eyes were fixed on Reza who was facing a different side, his attitude was cold again and did not care about me like this morning. While beside him, stood Yuli with a very unpretentious face towards me. I guess, I won't get any comfort at all being in this group.
“It's okay, Zytha. Here, standing next to me,” said a senior who looked friendly, I was quite relieved to get someone who could accept me in the group.
“Actually, this group has been formed from last semester and has made preparations. Only, there are some students who choose to retreat because of their unpreparedness, so I rely heavily on your help now,” explained a guidance teacher who was staring at me, he looks determined and hopeful in this group.
“Sorry to have waited, this is the key,” said a school guard who came panting, he was already looking old with a body that remained bent to pay his respects. No one said thanks to him, everyone, one after another rushed off to follow the guidance teacher without turning to the school guard.
“Thank you, Sir.” I who still left here also took the initiative to say it. Will my father's body be bent year after year?
