LOVE CRADLE

memories of the past

"Look, they left me. and I..."Her tears flooded her cheeks, with her tears half-heartedly wiped away like a child.

"I had to live in an orphanage, at first I didn't understand. I kept thinking that something was wrong, that they were not really dead and would come to pick me up.." Sisca's body shivered like a cold shudder.

"Sometimes I hate them for abandoning me" he continued in an atmosphere carried by memories of the past that he wished he had forgotten.

"It's fate, Sisca" Rico said very gently.

"I know" Sisca said quickly in an impatient tone.

"At that time I knew, but you didn't know.even though I knew they were innocent, a part of me still blamed them for leaving me alone without anyone accompanying me.

So I had to stay in the orphanage, because no family took care of me and the social service put me with the others there" said Sisca fiery.

"They should have brought me.and we.

.."

"Sisca, no!" cut Rico in a loud tone and sound rough..

So rude that Sisca looked at him fixedly, and suddenly realized what he was doing, which he said just now..

"Of course, I don't really want to die..After a few months there. But if there were no Jenny..

" Mother Michael? " split Rico slowly and subtly.

Sisca's eyes turned soft and glaring again, as if she looked far into the past and felt back the sadness she had experienced first.

"Yes, I could say I was raised as his son.he was kind of a mother to me. Without her.." Sisca fell silent and looked at Rico.

"That's why independence is so important to me, because when I was so young I learned how fragile we are when we need others..

They will leave you alone in grief. "

"Not to pay attention to anyone, nor to contact anyone, not to let anyone penetrate the fortress you built surround your heart. There's only one flaw in your argument" Rico added gently.

As Sisca looked at him tensely and intently she asked, "What about Michael? don't tell me you don't love her Sisca?"

"Another Michael", said Sisca fieryly.

"I owe Jenny for.."

"Holydening son? ah, I see.so it's okay to love someone because of obligation.that's what you mean?"

Suddenly Sisca had no idea what she was going to say, or how she felt, except that suddenly a heavy burden seemed to be lifted from her shoulders.

Does he see his independence as a burden? his near-relentless efforts to free his life from any emotional attachment were also a burden? impossible, right?

"Humans live not only with self-reliance" Rico said in a dry tone, deliberately misquoting.

"So does a woman, or I'd better say especially a woman".

" That's one of the most sexist comments I've ever heard" Sisca snapped to Rico.

Glad that he could concentrate his feelings on other matters, as an excuse to recover his shock from revealing his feelings earlier

...with all my pleasure, thought Sisca realizing bitterly.

"You misunderstood", said Rico kalem.

"Men and women have their own strengths and weaknesses, men must try long enough to be able to control their emotions like women. Don't deny that emotion, Sisca.feelings are what make.."

"Women become fragile" Sisca joked to him cutting off Rico's unfinished speech.