Love Comes Because of the Unaccustomed

Thieving

Time travels so fast, three months I pass without feeling. Today is a historic moment for me. The day on which the Hijab of Qabul is pledged, I will be bound by the great covenant on which the Throne of God shakes. Soon the beginning of a new life will begin, namely the lives of two human beings who are different characters and views are united in the household heresy.

Two weeks ago the family from Arka visited my house. This is the second time I saw a figure named Arka. Ever since the engagement I never met her. We only communicate through HP even if there are important things to talk about.

Arka is the first child of a wealthy business family, as the first child let alone the only son makes him very loved by his parents especially his mother. she has a little sister who is the same age as me her name is rose, a very beautiful girl in my opinion. One day while I was helping a auntie clean up in the kitchen she came up to me. He talks a lot about his brother's life. According to him even though his brother is very affectionate with his mother does not make him grow into a spoiled man. He is very independent and obedient whatever his parents say is always in his "yes" as long as it is good for him and his parents. The wealth he had and the title that was lined up behind his name also did not necessarily make him arrogant. His sense of grace and responsibility is so great. And all that was proven by setting up an orphanage for street children.

The bridal motorcade has arrived, pak penghulu has long waited. And the guests had started to arrive, I was ready with the wedding dress I was wearing, while I looked at my face in front of the mirror. There are tears coming out of my balls, I don't know why this heart seems to have not been sincere, doubt still stuck in the recesses of my heart, I'm not sure I can be happy and I'm not sure I can make my husband happy either, let alone the seeds of love for him have not grown in my heart.

"I accepted the marriage and marriage of Nisa syifa' juwairiyah bint Muhammad Ilyas with a dowry a set of prayer tools paid in cash.

Ijab-Qabul has been spoken, the covenant has been made. Two human beings have been united, ucapaan do'a and congratulations I got from the guests. From my face there was no joy or happiness. Hamdan who was currently sitting right next to me was more silent and only once looked at me. I was with him like a stranger who was new to him, no words said, just a smile we could do for our guests as a sign of our gratitude and respect for them. Many of them say that we are a compatible couple, they do not know the contents of our hearts at this time.

"Assalamu'alaikum Nisa, sorry I entered without knocking on the door, Nisa Abang apologized if this marriage was forced, brother also apologized not the intention of brother destroying Nisa's future, you know that Nisa doesn't like this wedding. Before my brother was also hesitant about this marriage, my brother had already agreed to it and my brother did not want to see my parents were disappointed with my brother's attitude. " Saying as he stood right behind me, I didn't dare to turn my face back, I didn't dare to look him in the face. Even though he is now someone who is lawful to me yet I feel alien to him.

"Nisa, brother will never force to love nisa brother, and brother also if not will force Nisa to have sex with brother. For now let your brother sleep in the next room. So Nisa doesn't have to worry and be afraid because you'll never force nisa, for so many times you're apologizing for all this." Further.

Again I still did not dare to turn my face, I was still in my original position, until the closed room door that marked hamdan had left the room. I felt so selfish of myself how proud I was, how disrespectful I was to her, when now I was her wife who had a duty to serve her, honor her and make her happy.. Why is my ego higher now. I would rather listen to my lust than my heart.

I realize now I have half a year as a wife but until now I have not really become a wife, I have not been able to carry out my role properly. I don't deny Arka is so kind, considerate, and she never demands anything from me, she always meets my needs. I always get his breath until one day just because I have a fever he is willing not to go to work, he is more willing to take care of me, he is very patient with my spoiled and childish actions. But somehow my attitude towards him was still cold, I still could not love him, my selfishness was still so great. I still don't want to admit that I'm starting to admire him. I don't want to admit that the seeds of love for her are beginning to grow in my heart. During the six months of my marriage, I had never been touched by my husband.Although we lived in our house rarely communicated, we were more busy with each other's activities. Hamdan would rather spend his time in his room as well as myself, even though we had breakfast and dinner together.