Last Prayer

The Abominable Wife

I left the water tap fully open. I think his coolness is just looking at him. Don't waste time, I'm moving my intentions. I put water in my hand. I started ablution. When the time came, spills of water splashed all over my face. Really made this heart cool again, relieving a little of my anxiety. Point by point, my wudhu ritual is done with great passion. Really, even though I often do it, but this time I want to linger ablution. Playing such cold water quenched my anxiety thirst.

I wear the face that has been provided in the mosque that is inside this hospital.

"Allahuakbar."

First time, I can still control it well. However, at the last moment, at the end of my prostration, a sense of distress entered into the recesses of the heart. The shadow of Heru mas drenched in blood continued to growl. The prayer for Aris that was bought by Heru mas, was clearly displayed in my mind. His blood made me cry again. I have no power to hold back the tears I hold so as not to burst.

"Astagfirullah ... Astagfirullah ... Astagfirullah ..."

I continued to prostrate, immersing my anxious face into the prayer mat. Hoping, the anxiety of bad things happening, instantly vanished with tears that seeped in the prayer mat.

"Allahuma innii 'audzubika minalhamma wal hazani wal'ajzi walbukhli waljubni wa dhzola'iddaini wa gholabatirrojali."

Slowly my anxiety disappeared. Now, I have returned solemnly to continue the bargain, the final tasyahud.

"Allahuakbar."

I chanted the final prayer of tasyahud with trembling lips. When the time came, I ended my prayer with greetings.

"Assalamualaikum Warahmatullah ... Assalamualaikum Warahmatullah ..."

Lips feel trembling. This rippled heart as he said his greetings. Not wanting to get away from my qibla, I raised both hands and asked. Sincere prayers for the healing of Heru, I say. When calling the name Heru mas, these lips again tremble, again my face is screeched with tears.

"Yes Allah ... Everything that happens in my life, I believe You are the most aware of the content in every test that I consider as a deposit on You to me. I'm only Your servant who deserves to refuse whatever Thy care. Heal Heru O God, awaken her from her sleep that not only hurts her, but also hurts me, even our son. Just you yes, Allah ... Only you can turn anything impossible into possible. I beg you, Allah ... Give me patience for what you will. Allahuahbaik ... Allahuahbaik ... Allahuahbaik ... Aamiin, Aamiin yes Rabbal Alamin ..."

I ended by rubbing my face with the palms I held.

I felt like I was in the hospital long enough. Suddenly, my thoughts returned to Aris which I entrusted to Ragil, the son of Iwan's mother. I think I'm worried about his situation. I hurried to step foot to meet Iwan's mother who was in the ward of Mr. Iwan.

"Assalamualaik."

Miss Iwan I saw sitting in the chair next to the bed playing with her phone. While Mr. Iwan, sleeping with his sleep.

"Vaalaikumsalam. Wulan, is it over?"

"Already, mom. Ma'am, I'm taking Heru's mas, right? I'm gonna go home for a second, see how Aris is doing. If there is any news from the doctor to mas Heru. Please let me know through Ragil soon, ma'am?"

"Yes, Wulan. Later occasionally, I see and ask Heru's condition with the doctor. You take care of Aris first, meet her. It's a pity that he'll wake up and wait for you too long."

"Yes already, mom. I'm going home yes. Assalamualaikum."

"Shortly, Wulan!"

"This is a little hold for you. Hopefully it can be enough to make at home also here. Accept yes!"

"Oh my God, mother. Just yesterday I couldn't get back, it's been given again."

"Loh, I didn't tell you to change, let alone reply. I'm giving this away, Wulan. Lillahi. You do not need to think about replying to it later on. No need!"

"Thank you very much, ma'am. It was like having a parent with a mother. My mother has always helped me. Though at all, I haven't been able to repay mother's kindness."

I hugged the body of Miss Iwan. The tears began to fall back. So excited by the kindness of ma'am Iwan all this time. A true kindness I never forgot. Apparently, my sobs were heard by Ms. Iwan. Instantly, he rubbed my back which was still in his embrace.

"It ... Don't cry anymore. Hurry home! Aris is waiting for you. Don't make Aris worry about waiting for you."

"Yes, mom. Assalamualaikum," I said while wiping the tears that had already dripped.

"Valayevansalam ... Careful, Wulan!"

My supposition ends my eyesight at Miss Iwan. I left him. I passed through the hallway by the hospital. Far enough to reach the exit. This hospital is indeed very large, owned by the government, and is the center of all existing hospitals.

"Guil!"

I was surprised with a screaming voice calling my name. My face turned towards the voice.

"Mother?"

I saw his hasty figure coming closer to me.

"Do you know where Heru's been taken to this hospital?"

"Mother just went home to look at Aris who said she had come home. Your neighbor, who was looking after Aris, told you this. Why did Heru get into an accident? You let him out? Where's Heru now?"

"Mom misunderstood, ma'am. I don't know when Heru came out of the house. When Aris and I went home, Heru was no longer home. Mas Heru was treated in the ICU room" I said with great care and fear.

"That's what you are! I see, Heru has never felt happiness since marrying you! So many problems have come since you became his wife! Are you not aware too? You're the fucking culprit! All impact on Aris and Heru. Heru got like this, because damn married you!"

Heart hurts. The words of mother-in-law rained down on this heart like a sword. Clear circle does not feel dripping. My chest was so tight that it was hard to breathe. I can't hold my cry. I cried in front of my mother-in-law.

"Cry all you can! I'm not willing, if Heru until why-why! You are to blame for all this. Heru is the mother's only child. Dissenting since you knew you. Heru is the mother's only child. Become a dissident to marry you. Now, he who has defended you desperately, lies weakly helpless! Can you reverse everything? Reverse my healthy, obedient son like I used to before I knew you? I hate you, Wulan. Hates you so much!"

The mother-in-law passed by leaving me weeping and fixated. While the people around me looked at me with pity, not a few looked at me strangely. I'm shy. Mother was so heartened to scold and insult me in front of the public. I'm like a woman with no self-respect. The trash woman he deserves to throw away. A daughter-in-law who has never been treated like a daughter-in-law.

'This Sehina is the wife of a child whose mother has never given her blessing until now?'