I'm with you, Mr. Teacher

In the Middle of the Complexity

Sandalwood closed his eyes. Both of his hands gripped the edge of the bench firmly.

Seeing the muscles of Cendana's arms stiffen, Ranum immediately embraced him, then rubbed gently on both shoulders.

"Please, same story."

Along with the escape of a clear circle that failed to be held, Cendana lay her head on Ranum's shoulder.

"Should be Mr. Teak, not Cakka." The sound of sandalwood interspersed with sobs.

"meaning?" Ranum thinks he heard wrong.

"The person who killed Cakka's life was actually targeting Jati sir." Sandalwood raised his head. "Pak Jati also saw the incident. He's right there." Sandalwoods are back.

Ranum's lips twitched about to say something, but not a single word managed to come out. He was shocked to hear the words of Sandalwood.

"If Mr. Jati had not run towards us, Cakka would have been alive."

"No! You can't say that. It's the same you're guilty of Mr. Jati."

"But it's true, right?" The sound of sandalwood is rising.

"Russia, Dana. Whatever happened that night, it's all God's provisions."

"You won't understand, because you didn't lose your sister." Sandalwoods throw a glance.

"Keep, until when do you want to beat Mr Jati? Forever?"

Sandalwood did not answer. He was busy wiping his tears.

"I think this is just because I'm emotional. It seems you need to calm down yourself." Ranum got up from his seat. "Gue waited for class, yes," he said, then split the basketball court into the corridor next to him.

After Ranum died, Cendana again gripped the edge of the bench, stronger than before. He was fully aware, his attitude was wrong. Since last night he has been trying for peace, but until now has not succeeded. I don't know how long it will take.

***

For Teak, the last hour of the day is heavy. Not because the energy is getting drained, but because he had to teach in the sandalwood class. Not as active as usual, this time Jati just repeat the previous material, then give an impromptu daily repetition that resulted in many protests from the occupants of class XII IPA 2.

Jati fell silent on her desk, taking an upright sitting position. Pretending to carefully watch the course of repetition, secretly Teak gaze more often leads to Sandalwood. The girl seemed serious about doing the problem, successfully behaving as if there had never been any closeness before with the young teacher who was now looking at her closely.

It's natural that he's disappointed, or even blames me. It takes time to understand everything. The sentence was repeated many times Teak said in his heart, the only attempt at calming down that he could do at this moment.

The bell rings home. Teak ask for the results of the collected. After everything was neatly gathered, Jati closed the meeting today and withdrew from that class.

"Sir!"

The Teak Steps that had already arrived at the doorway, choked, after hearing someone's call. As he turned around, Jaka was docked towards him while thrusting out a food box that instantly published an amused smile on Jati's lips.

"Nih, Susi's food box. I keep thinking about keeping it for a long time. It's like I'm carrying a time bomb everywhere."

Teak chuckling. "Nake?"

"Feed!" Jaka held out both thumbs.

"You want to pass it to the guy?"

Jati should have been blown away by Jaka's reaction, but stopped because suddenly Cendana passed them, escaped at the door, kept away without even looking at her.

"Quiet, Sir. It's just a matter of time. Everything will return to how it was," comfort Jaka after realizing where Jati's point of view is.

Although both of his shoulders had slumped, Jati tried to look fine. He smiled weakly at Jaka before stepping back to leave the room.

***

Before Mom left them, Jati had assumed that her family was the happiest family in the world. Happy version of Teak does not need to coexist with luxury goods, or routine holidays abroad every year end. It's enough to eat Mother's cooking every night, then gather in the living room afterwards, chatting things up. Dad usually tells about his students, while Jati tells more about his aspirations to become a professional musician.

As a parent, Dad never forced Jati to become a teacher. Whatever path Jati chooses, her only child must be better than her. That's what he always said. However, Jati has set Dad as a role model in his life. Simplicity, perseverance, discipline, and whatever is in Dad, secretly amazed Jati. So by itself Jati decided to follow his example, including becoming a teacher.

With confidence, Jati often said to Dad, that someday he could succeed as a teacher and musician. Dad always stroked the head of Teak whenever he said so. And it was the look in Dad's eyes at that moment that always fostered confidence in Jati, who now he can only miss.

However, when Mom suddenly left them for the happiness that I thought had never existed with them, Jati's confidence collapsed like a flooded settlement. Teak took a long time to rebuild it, slowly, until he managed to rise with a new understanding that makes his perspective different.

Jati sure never heard Dad and Mom quarrel. So if there has been a problem between them all along, their ability to cover it should be thumbs up. Teak is more relieved if only the disguised problem does exist, rather than this tragedy is purely based on material matters. Teak was always desperate whenever he thought about it.

After recovering from those injuries, Jati confirmed one thing, that not a single tiny bit of vengeful buds were growing in her heart for Mother. He just wants to prove to all who can be witnesses, that he can stand up straight again to achieve the ideals.

The formation of The Second Change Band makes Jati more excited. In that moment he felt he had the blessing of God. Her dream is getting closer. Therefore, no matter how busy he is with his other world, he tries to give his best every time with his favorite band. Included in all training sessions. However, tonight Jati really could not concentrate. His mind was filled with sandalwood. Many times he was reprimanded by his colleagues for wrong lyrics, or wrong entry.

Feeling their vocalist's condition could not be forced, they decided to break. Jati turned around and threw an apologetic gaze towards her comrades. Although they seemed to understand, Jati could feel a disillusioned aura mixed with annoyance that started to come out.

Get out of the studio first, then turn right onto the balcony. Upon arriving in front of the railing, he rubbed his face with a long sigh. The position of both hands moved from the face to the waist. He scrambled while looking up. His gaze seemed to be looking for answers up there, about what he had to do to re-attach his relationship with Sandalwood. Or if it can not be as it used to be, just an affirmation, that he is not to blame for the terrible event.

"In school again there's a problem, huh?" Sofyan interrupted the Teak reverie. He thrust out a can of cold soda as Jati turned her head towards him. "From yesterday you look fucked."

Teak received his drink while smiling weakly.

"Honestly, since I became a teacher, you've changed. If it is often late and saying goodbye to go home first, it is still mending. Because we understand, you have other obligations that are equally important. But your totality is also gone. We lost the spirit of the songs you sang. Not bad, but the feeling is different." Sofyan paused, sipping his drink a few times. "We always believe in you, so we don't mind when you decide to become a teacher. But please, appreciate our struggle so far." Unknowingly, Sofyan emphasized his sentence.

Jati failed to find a single word to refute. He's perfectly sitting in a guilty corner. He understands the consequences of his chosen path, and he always tries to minimize it.

"Gue sure, you can. Maybe right now you just have a problem that we should not know about. But if you want to tell a story, we're ready to hear it." Sofyan patted Jati's shoulder gently, then turned around intending to go back inside.

"Lo still remember the boy who was the victim of the concert riots at that time?"

Teak's words kept Sofyan's steps locked. Of course he remembers. The people involved there would not be able to forget that incident. But the question of Teak this time the direction is a little different. As the closest companion to her, Sofyan understands how the event fosters guilt in Jati.

Sofyan turned around and docked back to Jati's side. His gaze was now filled with curiosity; was this fellow able to escape the guilt or was it the opposite?

"Gue met the boy's family."

The confession just now caused a frown on Sofyan's forehead. "Continue?" his bur.

Then the story flows. Starting from the mugging action that morning, his meeting again with the victim snapped in the classroom as a teacher and student, to find out the girl's traumatic story to music, that forced him to shut down his identity as a band boy for a while.

Until here Sofyan can understand, that his best friend and musical partner has special feelings for the girl he is telling. Before, Sofyan had never heard Jati tell someone in this detail. But in the end he was quite jolted, after Jati explained that Cendana was the sister of the victim of the riots at that time. Now he understood, what kind of complexity is facing this friend.

***