Genatans

PAUSE AND EXPRESSION OF GENATHAN

Let's take a moment to calm down from the hustle and bustle of the buana. But, please promise to always be fine as long as the pause exists.

*****

He knows himself wrong. Consider him a coward for not being able to explain a reason. But, believe me, not everything is easy to convey through words. Moreover, Genathan is not a typical outspoken person. All this time, he tends to choose silence. However, his silence actually made everything even more complicated. The red thread that should have found the tip, instead returned to propagate.

Genathan is wrong. He accepts that now he is hated by everyone. The loss of the person he loves is also a consequence of his indecision all along.

Genathan's tired. He always had no chance to explain. He was always defeated by circumstances. The tombstone with a sense of longing. His hands smoothly sow flowers on the soil of the grave of the deceased mother. "Mother, Ge kangen. Tired, there is no Mother."

For a long time Genathan has not complained like this to the mother. Even if he came to the tomb, he only prayed and sowed flowers. "Mother why don't you ever play in Genathan's dream again?" he asked with one hand rubbing the tombstone, and the other hand patting the ground.

"Sorry papa, huh, Bun? Papa hurt Mother first? Previously, Genathan had said to not want to be like a papa who hurts the heart of a sincere woman loves him. But it looks like Genathan failed, Bun. Genathan has hurt a sincere man who loves Gege. Again, because Gege is hard to clear. I'm sorry, Bun, because this Mother's son failed to keep a woman's heart."

Genathan still reveals his heart. It was as if the mother was really beside him and listened to his grievances. It was as if the mother also gently rubbed her head. His form is no longer visible to the eye, but his affection will still be felt as long as Genathan's breath is still blowing throughout the universe.

"Too my sister, Bun. Obviously Ge can't leave him. Moreover, he was easily sick when he thought of something. Genathan knew we couldn't get together, so Genathan chose to leave home a year ago. Then Genathan met Naresha. The younger brother of the class who turned out all this time Ge wait for when the emergence. Naresha is not an escape, Bun, but a quest." The tone of the man's voice sounded hoarse and weakened.

Since long ago, only with the mother of Genathan freely told a story. When others judge and revile, only you are willing to hear and understand.

Losing her mother as her first love, is the biggest heartbreak of a boy. Since the mother is no longer grounded in the buana, since then Genathan began to feel lost the milestone of his backrest. The man began to waver in a state of confusion.

Slowly, Genathan grew tired.

The man rests his forehead on the back of the hand attached to the mother's tombstone. "Bun, let's play to Genathan's dream. Invite Gege to play to the new world of Mother. No one knows me if I'm hard to say."

Again, Genathan is stepping into this phase. The heaviest longing for someone who he can no longer hug tightly, when the tightness starts to crouch.

***

Genathan stood stiffly looking at someone ahead there. He wanted to step forward, but his legs seemed to be fixated. Seeing Genathan who had no movement, made Gentala growled and hit the back of his best friend's head. Success makes Genathan shocked and snickered while holding the back of his head

"What the hell, Ta?!" pissed Genathan with sharpened eyes.

"Samperin, I'm hunting, right?" Gentala tried to give fire so that Genathan would be ignited and move.

But beyond belief, Genathan just took a slow breath. "It's hard, Ta."

"Eat him try, or hunt," urged Gentala.

"Lo why, anyway? Don't you have a crush on Resha? Why don't you fight him? It's a good time for you, Ta," said Genathan. He did not understand Gentala who always told him to get closer to Resha, when he also had the same feeling.

Gentala let out a slow breath. "Until now Naresha wanted it to be Genathan, not Gentala."

"His mindfulness is self-conscious, it can only make Naresha hurt" Genathan replied as if.

Gentala clucked in annoyance. Most regrettably if Genathan had thought pessimistic like this. "Ge, Resha's hurt because you didn't explain her anything. Tell me, Ge. Don't gini ah. Lo guys, gotta be brave. Huff. I love Resha, but I realize that she's not the same as me."

Genathan closed his eyes. Take a deep breath and breathe it out slowly. Trying to calm himself down, before finally stepping forward to Naresha. Seeing that, Gentala smiled in relief.

Again, Gentala is okay. He knows, he cannot force.

Back at Genathan, the guy approached Resha who was sitting on the white bench with a stock. "Hello, Deck!" she smiled a little.

Resha also returned a small smile. "Hi, Brother!"

Resha was quite surprised to see what Genathan had come to with a smile on the man's face. Although his feelings are still hurt when he sees Genathan, he tries to give his best smile.

"How are you? Just be healthy, right?" tanya Genathan who got the nod by Resha.

Resha shook her head and closed her container. "No. Say what?"

"Before, Brother wanted to apologize, Dek. All this time Brother must have hurt you a lot, huh? You must feel the number of duakan compared to Ayu." Genathan begins the explanation. The man took his breath in bowing his head while trying to neutralize himself.

"No papa, Brother. I realize how, Brother's feelings for Kak Ayu," Resha's sergeant with a small oddity.

"Yes, a brother's feelings for his sister. Dek, Ayu's my sister. Not just friends, we are one papa. Moreover, he often dropped most thoughts. The past few days, she had a lot of thoughts due to her papa's changing attitude. Since childhood, Ayu most deket same papa. Not my father, my father. But since his father found out that Ayu was not his biological child, his father changed. Moreover, his father had a new wife" explained Genathan.

Resha. Surprised to learn that fact. "Who? Means—"

Genathan cut it off and explained everything. Yesterday's explanation was also obtained from the papa. To be honest, Genathan was ashamed to tell that because to him this was the disgrace of his family. But he doesn't want any more misunderstandings.

Only on Resha did he tell her and he hoped Resha was not a man of colossal thoughts if the child out of wedlock was an illegitimate and despicable child. He just didn't want his sister to get that nickname.

Even if they can't be together anymore, at least they're done well without any misunderstandings.

Resha listened carefully to Genathan's explanation. The burden carried by the boss bentala in front of him was not that easy. He could see the tired gazes emanating from the Netra Genathan. Resha could not bear, it was very curious to embrace a sturdy back that was actually fragile.

He misunderstood all this time. But do not blame him, obviously this is also because Genathan who does not want to explain it early.

"Sister, sorry ... all this time I was thinking strangely," said Resha.

Genathan shook his head and smiled soothingly. "No papa. I was also wrong because I'm just explaining it now. Yesterday, I was confused about how to explain. I'm ... embarrassed. I wanna say something else?"

Resha nodded in favor.

"Never assume that you're an impingement or anything like that. I revealed the feeling that day, because it really existed. Not out of pity or anything. People as good as you do not deserve to be made just a runaway," said Genathan slowly but firmly.

"Gue's been waiting for his class sister who took photos two years ago, but I'm ashamed of how he asked. Until finally that day came. You come again, and I don't want you to disappear again. I actually lost it because of myself. Again, sorry. I'm wrong."

Resha swallows the salivary with difficulty hearing Genathan's explanation. His heart is still beating. Genathan's voice still makes a rustle. Resha is not evasive, her feelings still rest on Genathan.

"Gue understood, we both need a pause to understand this all. Please live without me first, Res. I also need to make peace to accept all of this. I don't want to push back, because I understand you also need time. But, you have to promise to always be okay." Genathan looked down with a hand that held Resha's tiny hand. While Resha feels confused to make a sound.

"Where are you going?" ask Resha raspy.

"Not anywhere. I was around you. I just want to remember myself first, because I'm sure you also need to pause it. My heart made you. I don't want to force, I want to strengthen myself first,” explained Genathan more cleanly.

Resha understands. True Genathan said, the pause was necessary.

***

If there is another in this phase, does the pause need to be no anyway? Didn't expect it turned out Genathan's life was that difficult.

The wound is too big.

I'm back with this teenfiction story, I hope you like this story. Because this story is also no less exciting than my other stories.

So, do not forget to make likes, comments, votes, and love to add this story to the library! Let's not miss the latest update of this story.

Check my profile also yes to read my other stories, and do not forget to make this account follo yes.

See you next chapter.

Thanks for reading all.