Beautiful But Dangerous
Episode 193
Each soul has a different tolerance - different in understanding and dealing with emotional problems, Keysa who is trapped in unhealthy actions, self-harm, and self-harm, when he felt that there was no other way to help him, the act of hurting himself the way Keysa struggled with his emotions and frustrations were certainly very dangerous.
Keysa who hurts himself, feels the sensation of calmness and satisfaction that is temporary, but then the feeling of guilt will arise followed by a recurrence of anger and frustration that smothers his feelings, and it is impossible to do anything more fatal.
After waiting for two hours, Keysa regained consciousness and began to feel pain in his arm, he grimaced in pain while holding his arm.
"Geez, it hurts so much!" his murmur endured the pain.
"Thank God you're sober" the nurse said with a smile.
"Suster, it hurts a lot" he replied.
"In the meantime, I'm gonna inject some painkillers" he said.
The nurse immediately injected painkillers to reduce the pain in her arm.
"Why are you doing this?" ask Nurse.
"I don't know what's wrong with me, but life is ashes, my life is dark and empty" he said.
"Do you want to die?" tanyakanya.
"No, I don't want to die, I just want to channel my emotional and inner wounds into my physique" he replied firmly.
"You know what? it's very dangerous, and it's of no use" he said.
"I don't need you to tell me that hurting yourself is pointless, that there are still many people who are more unlucky than me. I know all that stuff, but that's not what I need. Rubbing my body in a powerful way to ease my anxiety and sadness, there is a calmness I get in feeling the pain when I do that which I cannot get through sleep, venting." he said.
"What is your purpose in telling all this? are you looking for attention?" ask the nurse again.
"Nothing if that's what you think, because it's what I get if someone knows I hurt myself, if seen, my life looks good, there's no reason for me to do this."Reply firmly.
"You need to consult a Psychiatrist to get a briefing." the Nurse orders.
"No, I don't dare, because I'm afraid to be the lips of the Society and be considered crazy by my Family" he said.
"But for now you really need a Psychiatrist or Psychologist" he replied.
"If you're honest, there were times when I hurt my arm for attention. Because I want other people to listen to my feelings" he said.
"I don't know the story of your life, but you should never do this again, you're young and your life's journey is long" he said softly.
Keysa did not flinch, he simply stared at the ceiling of his room with a blank look, disregarding the words of the Nurse.
"Yes, please come out." she said cynically.
The nurse smiled, examining the infusion on her body, leaving Keysa.
Keysa sneered, glancing at the Nurse with the glare of his sharp eyes, he thought the Nurse was the same as his Papa who did not understand his feelings.
The sleeping Ms. Zana was shocked, as the Nurse woke her up while patting her arm gently.
"Mom, wake up, Keysa's awake," he said.
"Oh, sorry, I fell asleep" he blushed.
"It's okay, I just want to tell you that Keysa is conscious" she replied with a smile.
"Thank God, Keysa finally came to his senses" he murmured.
Ms. Zana rushed to Keysa's room, her heart so happy that it could not be expressed in words, when she arrived at the room she immediately embraced her, kissing her forehead affectionately.
"Keysa, I'm glad you're sober" he said softly.
"Oh yeah?" cold answer.
"You should be grateful, God still loves you, finally able to go through a critical period" he said.
"Who said God loves me, Mom? the proof is my mama's taken, now my Papa's sick with Cancer, that's his name, baby?" his yell.
"Keysa, don't say that, God will be angry" he reminded.
"Biarin" he answered briefly.
Ms. Zana shook her head, then shifted her conversation.
"After coming home from the hospital, I want to know what's going on for Keysa?" ask Ms. Zana.
"Whatever," he answered.
Bu Zana was silent, she just tidied up her disheveled hair, and looked at him with a tearful blur.
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