A Friend from Malaysia

Pain in the Past

Pov Yola's

"So, you came here just to take Ammar back to Indonesia?" ask Atok.

I nodded while breathing out.

"It's disappointing" Atok said furiously.

I can't say anything else. I have to keep trying anyway. It's all for Mama's sake. I don't care about that kid. Not at all.

"Yola, you're still Atok's granddaughter-in-law. Didn't it ever occur to you to snatch Inspiration from that woman? How could you come here just for taking Ammar? All this time you never once cared about him, never visited him let alone pay attention to him. How can anyone believe you're gonna keep him?"

"Mama will take care of Ammar, Atok. Mama is sick. Mama wants this time to let Mama take care and nurture Ammar," I said.

"Already suspected. You're not here of your own accord. Mama you told me to! Then there's nothing more we can talk about. Go home! Don't come here, if your goal is only to make Atok angry," Atok Yahya said grimly.

I breathe again. Yeah, failed! Sorry Yola, Mama!

"Alright, Atok! Then Yola, excuse me!

I immediately got up from my seat and walked towards the exit.

"All right! You can take Ammar to stay with your Mamah but on condition of Atok!"

I immediately looked back at Atok. My face is happy again.

"Alright, Atok! What condition is that?" I hurriedly sat back near Atok.

"There was an empty post as marketing director at N-one Grocery. Marketing Director, interview and interview will be held in two days. Atok nak Yola took this opportunity to occupy the post" said Atok Yahya.

I was flabbergasted, what did Atok mean?

"I mean Atok?"

"I mean Atok, if indeed kite should not be united in family relations. Atok mau kite in a mutually beneficial business relationship. Atok wants you to be the director of marketing at N-one Grocery Kuala Lumpur."

I smiled wryly.

"Yola can't handle it. After all, that department feels too high for me. Yola is just a scholar, not a master or doctor of economics" I refused.

Atok smiled and looked at me meaningfully.

"The grandson of Atok's son-in-law from the past was happy to be very humble. Yolanda M.B.A., B. The Bachelor of Business Administration. A graduate of the Warthon School of The University of Pennsylvania. During college Yolanda was also a stock trader in wall street United States. And after returning to Indonesia, until now still served as a trader on the Indonesia Stock Exchange. Is Atok wrong?"

I was dumbfounded for a few minutes. Until it's as hard as Atok digging up information about me?

"So Atok nak Yola served as Marketing Director at N-one Grocery. For 1 year, Yola's pabile can increase N-one turnover by 30%, Ammar's custody will be given to Yola. Inspiration also can not want to disturb that matter. How sort? Yola can't?"

"So, what does Yola have to do as a trader with being a marketing director? I don't think there's any correlation, Atok," I argue.

Atok Yahya this seems to confuse me. Obviously between traders and marketing is something different. What does this have to do try?

"Obviously there. Your luck and success as a trader will bring good luck to the N-one Grocery. What about Yola. Want no?" ask Atok.

"Remember .... Looks like Yola can't" I said with a heavy heart. It was in my mind the figure of that man. The man who had brought me down 7 years ago.

"On Inspiration, Yola is worried. Ilham not in KL. Die lives in Johor taking care of the N-one branch there," Atok said.

I took and exhaled repeatedly my breath. Although he does not live in Kuala Lumpur, but still he can come at any time. I really don't want to meet him.

"Where's Yola?" insist Atok.

"It's only been a year, right, Atok?"

"Yes. Je year. Atok needs someone who can raise the turnover of the N-one. Yola knows for herself. Mase ni much very rival. In recent years, N-one Johor has lost a lot. The company has a deficit. Therefore Ilham Atok sent to Johor. But then also N-one KL affected, also lost," complained Atok.

"But during that year, can Yola take Ammar occasionally to Jakarta for a vacation? Mama really wants to see Ammar," I asked.

"Can. Just so you bring it back here. After a year, you can not only bring a holiday. Custody will also give Atok," replied Atok.

Yola nodded in understanding.

"Alright Atok. But Yola has a request," I said.

"Ape it?" ask Atok.

"Yola will follow Atok's request according to company procedures, through test links and interviews. Yola doesn't want to enter N-one grocery because of the help of insiders. Although this is Atok's request, Yola still wants to get the position with the honor and ability of Yola," I asked.

"Alright," Atok said with a heavy heart. "But what if you don't pass the interview?"

I smile.

"That means, Yola is not as great as Atok was proud of earlier," I said.

Atok's eyes glanced at me.

"How does Atok know you're not cheating on this? What if Yola wasn't serious about the interview?"

"That means Yola won't be able to take Ammar back. Take it easy Atok. Yola is really serious about this" I said convincingly.

Atok Yahya nodded. Then with a sigh that felt heavy Atok looked at me.

"Actually you don't have to work this way to get Ammar back. Yola just needs to make up with Inspiration. Ilham and Sonia did not have children. Is Yola worried. It is sad that Atok has seen you grandchildren and grandchildren of Atok's son-in-law live like this" Atok said. He seems really sad.

Not only Atok, in my deepest heart this is far, far more crowded considering the reality of life.

"But Yola and Brother are separated" I said.

"To know Atok Ilham never dropped a talaq on Yola," Atok said.

"It's true Atok, but we've been separated for 7 years. According to religious law we can already be said to be divorced if more than 3 months we separated without any birth and inner living." I said.

"The taste of kite all know very well, if Yolalah who has been very eager to avoid Inspiration and reject all gifts even met with her. It's not Ilham don't want to give Yola a living" Atok said in defense of his grandson.

"Betul Atok, but Yola does not want to share her husband with others. That'sallthatis. Brother's already Sonia. Atok should not be selfish and want Yola again. Quite an early marriage that the Nirwan and Gunawan families sacrificed Yola for. Yola certainly can not blame the Nirwan family alone. My mom and dad were wrong too. Therefore, Yola has been sincere about everything. Except for Mama, he really wanted Ammar. Yola could not ignore the feelings of Yola's own parents. So Atok, Yola will accept the terms of Atok. But after the next year if Yola can increase the turnover of N-one, please Atok not break the promise," I said.

\*\*\*\*\*\*

The encounter with Atok reminded me again of that old wound. The wound that the man inflicted on me. The deep wounds.

Inspiration 7 years ago, asked my parents for permission and took me back to "home". The house we call "green house" because it is in the green hills. While there Ilham had pledged his love to me and persuaded me to live a real household with him. He was very good at seducing me to fall into his arms so that for 3 short days we only spent the time to combine love, make love and make out like other married couples.

Only 3 days after driving me home safely to Indonesia, Ilham left to return to Berlin.

"Yola, in the past 3 months, my brother wants to finish his education. My brother will soon be Judicium. That's artinye, brother will go back to Yola. Kite will be together when the mase arrives. He will work for Abi Papah company, so he can stay close to Yola. After Yola graduated from school, my brother took Yola to Berlin. Kite went to college there. Yola took a bachelor's program, brother also took a master. How sort? Yola wants to?" she hugged me with love.

But not 3 months, something happened. Papa somehow got the news that his only son-in-law had married another woman. Sonia, she's the girl that Ilham's brother met at the mall. And worse yet they are true lovers. They were in a relationship behind my back when they were in Berlin. And worse than that, they were involved in a scandal.

The Sonia family demanded that Ilham marry their daughter legally of religion and state. What is my day that is only married by religious law. I don't have any legal documents to prove my marriage because the state actually views my age as not old enough to marry.

Papa and Mama took me to the Nirwan family asking Ilham for an explanation right on their wedding day. But Ilham could not explain anything to me and my family.

"Yola, forgive brother. I don't think it's like this ...."

"Wicked do you know Yola? Brother says brother will go back to Yola and wants to have a real marriage relationship with Yola. But what is this, brother?" I was sad that time.

"Ape you blame Inspiration? The marriage between you and Inspiration is nothing more than a marriage based on agreement alone. What do you want from this marriage? Of love? Me and Inspiration love each other. Not you! I and Ilham have been together for a long time, again we are still in high school. You Yola, realize yourself a little! The little boy wants to get married" he said.

"Abang, is that really what he said? Brother and Sonia are dating behind my back?" I still can't believe it. As hard as I can to hold my tears.

"Not just love. But me and Ilham ...."

"Sonia!!!" ilham Bentak.

"Ape? I really want Kate on this kid. You can't hide this forever from him Inspiration. Come on, you promised me. But if Yola doesn't want to be divorced, it doesn't matter. Sonia's brother did not mind Yola being the honeymoon Abang Ilham. Just saje, think, how do you feel having parents hear people gossiping about you being ... Hmmm ape language in Indonesian tu ye? The actor? Men's grabbers, hmm?"

Sonia touched my chin with her index finger.

"Beautiful castor. How can your parents hear that kind of thing?" ask with antagonistic intonation.

I brushed sonia's hand off my chin.

"I'm not a lasher! You're the actor!" I said sharp. "I've been married to my brother for 4 years. And you took him from me!"

"Who would believe that? Nyatanye, I am the wife who married the legal and state legal Inspiration. But if you want your family and Nirwan's family to get its sap from the state for marrying a minor, you can fight for it only you have the right" he said

I'm speechless. I understand this matter. In Indonesia there is also a child protection community. There must be in Malaysia, right? I don't want mom and dad to get in trouble.

"Abang ..." Call me to Ilham.

I want him to at least defend me. No, I want to at least make the snake woman quiet.

Inspiration still does not flinch. He threw his face away from me.

"Absite ...." I started shedding tears.

"Must cry too? Stay divorced and. After that you can find another man, go to school, continue your life." he said lightly.

If it were that easy, I thought.

"Hm .... Do not say you and Inspiration have ....? Haaah? You and Ilham have done "that"? Inspiration! You've been in touch* with this kid?" ask him on Inspiration. There was a very fiery anger. I also felt an inexplicable jealousy there.

"Brach!!!" Sonia shakes Ilham's shoulder. While Ilham is looking at me. I see regret in those eyes.

Are you sorry you did that with me, brother? Do you feel like it betrayed Sonia? batin asked.

My tears are getting worse.

"Hey little boy! Don't you fucking cry that macem! Blame yourself so stupid you can't keep your body! Do you even know how heaven feels? You don't think you're so cheap?" pox.

"Sonia!!!!" ilham Bentak. "Enough!! I'm quiet doesn't mean I can't ...."

"Ape? Ape? You have already said the word against me Ilham. Kenape I can't say anything to another woman who comes to take me a husband. He's really stupid. What was wrong I said about that? It's stupid too!"

I wiped my tears and straightened my head.

"Abang, don't fight with your new wife. What he said was right. I was stupid. Otherwise how could I be fooled by all these lies? That vow, promise and declaration of love? " i said with a smile. "For 16 years of my life, apart from papa, the only man I knew was my brother. I fell in love with you because you didn't let me have a chance to know and love someone else. Even before I got my first period, I knew that I could only and would only marry the son of the Nirwan family. But after all that, why did you lie to me? Why do you say you love me when you love someone else? I don't mind loving my brother in silence even if it's unrequited, even if you only consider me a sister or just a doll wife. Even if you just vent your lust on me. I can't refuse and say anything. But why .... Why lie to me? Why did you say you love me?"

"Yelins ...." Inspiration looks depressed now. He must be feeling guilty.

But who cares. It feels so painful. I'm the most hurt of all these people.

"Enough to get here, brother. From now on, Yola will no longer have a relationship with her brother. Yola will ask papa to break this marriage. And again like Sonia said we're not tied to official marriage by country. It won't be hard to decide. Just parting ways, is enough, right? In the future I hope I will never meet and be in touch with my brother again. May you and Sonia be happy."

I left the bridal room where we were left to talk three with a sore heart. Heart hurts.

And the pain was not enough to get there, after a few weeks, I had a very severe fever and vomiting. Mama took me to the doctor. And the results were surprising. The doctor said I was pregnant. Made my mom angry with me.

"Yola, why did this happen? When did you and Ilham do that?!" insist Mama.

Maybe if my marriage wasn't complicated like this, Mama wouldn't be this angry.

"Jawab Yola!! Why are you pregnant? You and Ilham .... What was it when he took you to Malaysia?" guess Mama.

I nodded seduively.

"******** that!!! Mom thought she couldn't be trusted. He said you only want to go on vacation because it's called Atok. But you! Why don't you take your usual medicine, Yola??"

I'm shaking.

"Yola lu-pa ba-carry, Ma. And ... And my brother said it was okay. Her husband's brother Yola and she must be responsible. Huuu... hiks.." I replied.

"Imresponsible? So what does it mean to marry someone else?" mama said with a growl.

I was silent for a moment. Long until I speak again.

"Mama, I don't want this kid. Let's just throw it away Ma ..." I asked.

Mama gasped at my words, not expecting it to come out of my mouth. Then with a bang he shook my body.

"What did you say, Yola? Abort?!! The child in your stomach is your granddaughter!!! Your son!" his yell. "How can you say that? Can't be like this? Mama's gonna talk to Nirwan's family. Inspiration has to take responsibility!"

I pulled Mama's hand.

"No, Ma. Can't." I said as I shook my head." Yola doesn't want any more business with them. If you really want Yola to give birth to this child, Yola will give birth to Mama. But don't take me there again, Ma. That's too sakiiit .... Yola is not strong, Ma ...."

My mom saw me crying.

"Honey, Yola's Mama's strong boy. You can survive, honey. Mama and Papa will always be by your side" said Mama as she hugged me.

I have had painful days since then. My growing belly made me a gossip at school. Only Hafiz has always faithfully accompanied me. Thanks to the connection from Papa, the school still allowed me to go to school after Papa explained the situation that I had been married for a long time with photographic evidence during my marriage contract with Inspiration. The school tolerates it, but not the students. Everyone scoffs at me, even says all the bad things to me. Hafiz used to be there to defend me. So sometimes he was accused of being the father of the child I bear.

Mama Zubaedah, knowing that I was pregnant only promised to make Inspiration come back to me even if I didn't need that promise. And in fact, however, she promised Ilham never came or just asked how my pregnancy was. All I heard was that she and Sonia, after marriage, returned to Berlin to take a master's degree program.

Until I gave birth to the boy Atok and Mama Zubaidah came to take my son. Mama really objected, actually, Mama wanted to babysit her first grandchild but again the selfish papa agreed to it on the condition that they would not interfere with our lives again and bring up the past about their son accidentally "missing" at the Gunawan family residence. Papa said it was also for my own good. I need to continue my education and organize my life again and do not want me burdened by the predicate of a mother who has had children. Papa wants to clean up my past.

And I agree to that. Graduating high school papa sent me to college Uncle SAM. Studied business administration at a leading private university there.

But for a long time, my mother fell ill. His heart was weak, he wanted me to bring Ammar back into his arms. As the grandson of the Gunawan family. That's why I went to Atok. Because only Atok can grant my wish, without having to meet the man.