We Are Not Alone We Are Social Creatures
The Alone Human Response
Actually, it's okay if the child prefers to be alone. Just having 1 or 2 friends also does not mean that children have problems socializing. However, if the Little One has no friends at all, Mother may need to find out the reason and pay special attention to it. Reasons Children Love to Be Alone
One of the reasons children prefer to be alone is because they feel they do not know how to start playing with others who are not yet familiar with it. Children whose characters are shy and introverted or ambivert personality will also need time to be alone.
In addition, other factors, such as lack of sleep, can make children become angry faster and less energy to socialize. Children can also prefer to play alone because they feel their parents do not like some of their friends. The thing you need to be aware of is if the Little One withdraws from the association because of personality disorders, anxiety disorders, depression, or trauma due to sexual abuse or other forms of violence, he said, like bullying (bullying) by his friends. In certain cases, the child may also be more often alone if he suffers from certain conditions, such as autism.
How to Help a Lonely Child
Mommy can start paying attention to the pattern of friendship of the Little One since the age of 3–4 years or school age. If Mother sees the Little One more often alone, you should immediately talk to her to find out why. Try to understand and invite him to discuss without forcing Mother's will.
In addition, Mother can also help him by doing several things, such as:
1. Find a suitable friend
If the Little One looks suitable with one or several friends, Mother can schedule a play event with these friends. If the Little One can play familiar with friends who feel they are suitable for him, it is hoped that he can more easily adapt to his other friends.
2. Observe all daily activities
Does the child eat his food? Did he sleep enough? Are his assignments at school done? Does he interact with his friends? The answers to these questions can help Mother to see the character of the child's personality or the cause of his aloof nature.
3. Helps to be calmer
Some children do have a higher level of anxiety than other friends, so they tend to be afraid to start friendships and prefer to be alone.
The solution is that Mommy can help the Little One deal with this, for example by accompanying him when he has to meet many new people.
Giving support is different from encouraging children, yes, Bun. The Little One may withdraw if Mother pushes him with words like, “Why don't you look for friends?”.
Instead, give him support by hearing his complaints and encourage him to dare to tell the Mother. This will also help him to be more open and familiar with the people around him.
5. Providing the right environment
If the child chooses to play alone because his friends do not like Mommy, Mommy can start a dialogue with the child, for example by talking about the adverse effects that may arise if the child follows the bad habits of his friends.
However, parents also actually should not be too pushy or authoritarian to the child's friendship environment. It's good if Mommy listens to the Little One's point of view first, then gives him good understanding and direction.
If the Little One wants, Mother can provide the right environment and Mother believes good for her, for example by registering her to join a sports club or art activities that she likes.
6. Set a good example
Don't forget to evaluate yourself, Bun. Does your mom socialize with friends and neighbors? It is not impossible, you know, children like to be alone because they imitate their parents who rarely socialize. Instead, seeing Mommy happily with friends will motivate her to make more friends.
Well, there are some things you can do if your child likes to be alone. However, Mother needs to know that there is also a positive side of children who like to play alone.
This means he feels enough with himself, and this can also be one sign that the Little One has high intelligence and creativity, you know, Bun. A child who has many friends sometimes need time to play alone, just like adults who occasionally also need time to be alone.
So, it's okay if the Little One looks happy and enjoys playing alone. Support him always to develop his creativity and imagination. Most importantly, children can still socialize and not be closed at all to others. If the child is really closed and always alone, and Mother finds it difficult to help her, Mother can consult a psychologist to get the best advice and solutions.
