The story of the Gigolo

Counseling with a psychologist

Rina Gunawan S,psi , Mpsi That's the name on the door of her counselling room.

Alrik says he's the best psychologist in town and can help with my problems.

There are several psychologists and psychiatrists in this clinic.

The clinic is not too big but it is a new building so the condition is very clean.

I was sitting in the waiting room because Rina's psychologist was still a patient.

I waited with two other people. But we're going to see a different psychologist.

At first we were busy with our phones.

But since it had been thirty minutes we waited I finally opened the chat.

A woman named Iren and a man named Muklis.

This Iren is twenty-seven years old, his appearance is all black black with long sleeved t-shirts.

He started talking about his life. Iren comes from a broken home family where both parents are remarried.

Her mother and father divorced when Iren was seven years old.

He was left with his mother's grandmother who also lived alone since Iren's grandfather died five years ago.

From childhood he had never felt the affection of his parents.

He was not even considered by his parents.

The last memory he remembers is when his parents took little Iren to the zoo.

At that time Iren did not know that it was the last time he would feel happiness.

Both of his parents are unwilling to take Iren to his new family.

If in the divorce case usually both ex-spouses will fight over the child, different from both parents Iren.

They even leave Iren with his Grandma or rather leave him with his Grandma.

Although he only met his mother at Christmas and had not met his father since his parents divorced, but Iren was reconciled with his life when he met Grandma.

Iren felt that during his life with his grandmother he had lived a normal life and thought that his life was fine.

Iren's grandmother loved her only granddaughter so much that Iren didn't lack affection.

But by the time he lost his Grandmother because his grandmother died suddenly.

And Iren himself who found his Grandma was no longer breathing in his private room.

It makes Iren hurt and triggers back the past that Iren had difficulty forgetting.

Despite knowing Grandma Iren is dead, but her parents still do not want to take Iren with them.

Lonely Iren dissolves into a deep sadness until he finally attempts his first suicide attempt.

He slid his wrist on the seventh day after his grandmother.

Fortunately he can still be saved by his neighbors who are preparing tahlilan for his grandmother.

Since then he was referred to see a psychologist or psychiatrist by the doctor who treated him.

And Iren's been counseling for a month at this clinic.

And the second man has a muklis. Muklis was a man who grew up in a harmonious family.

He does not need the services of a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Until finally his entire family was slaughtered by people who owe their families.

The one who owes this is his own neighbor.

He was in debt where he ended up stressed and killed the entire Muklis family.

Only Muklis survived because he was helping spread his friend's wedding invitations throughout the house in his area.

The tragic events made their way into the national news.

When I googled the news.

Muklis had been in counseling for two weeks.

Iren lost his grandmother, I lost both my parents and Muklis lost his entire family.

" Alfred Wijaya "The nurse called my name.

I stood up and told my two new friends.

This counseling room is dominated by white color.

There aren't many photos here, there are only a few charter awards.

" Hello Alfred "The psychologist Rina greeted me.

And so began our counseling session.

I called her by the name of Ms. Rina a request from Ms. Rina herself.

According to Ms. Rina, Psychologist is not a doctor so I do not need to call him a doctor just enough Ma'am.

At the beginning of the session, Ms. Rina asked how my life is now.

I told everything to Ms. Rina. He patiently listened to all my stories.

Give a tissue when I cry and give a hug when I cry great.

Telling him made me recall details after details of the accident.

And how I lived after that.

How lonely and empty I felt after losing both my parents.

I also blame myself for their loss.

I feel like their departure happened because of my dirty work as a gigolo.

Even though I never told anyone but Ms. Rina, that's exactly how I felt.

The highest level of supposition I think is, if I were not a gigolo maybe my parents would not have received bad karma from what I felt.

Ms. Rina tried to calm myself down and reassure me that the deaths of both my parents were not because of me.

That all the destiny of life has been made before we were born.

Ms. Rina suggested I do some charity work to help calm me down.

So that I can see the world even bigger and live not just in black and white.

He even advised me to go back to Bandung and continue my Papa business.

I even forgot my Papa's efforts. How it goes after Papa is not around.

Chatting with Ms. Rina made me feel a little calm.

I'll try to do what Mbak Rina suggested.

Coming home from the clinic I immediately packed some of my clothes and because the day was still bright I went straight to Bandung.

Two hours drive I arrived at my house.

Papa's car was still parked in front and filled with a lot of dust.

The yard is filled with small garbage.

No lighting because all the lights are off.

This house is like my condition now, lonely, alone and empty.

I turned on all the lights in this house, cleaned the dusty house.

I'll sleep in Papa and Mama's room. Inhaling all the smells of Papa and Mama that were still left in his room.

Papa and Mama's room is still in good condition.

All the stuff is still in place, I took the usual nightgown worn by Mama and Papa and hugged her.

I cried softly, even the sound of my crying was heard in all directions.

Help Alfred to stay strong to live all this Ma Pa.

Due to the fatigue of crying I fell asleep still in full clothes.