SUBSTITUTE ARMY

V&V 22

VALENSIA PROV'S

THE WOUNDS I MISSED

I know the romance story of each person has a destiny and love story each there is happy but there are also sad maybe because it must end with separation.

I am also well aware of the various forms of separation sometimes because it is not sanctioned by family, incompatibility, infidelity, disputes, differences, contradictions and because of death.!

as I still experience, it used to be Alm's favorite little girl. Yal is me.! but after the departure of Alm for all eternity, I lost the call "my dear little girl"

I'm getting crumpled and getting crumpled

amazingly now in a short time I returned to be the fiancee of another man who is also the younger brother of a man I love very much, is this not a betrayal from me for him.?

how selfish of me.!

the atmosphere tonight felt very cold along with the rumbling and heavy rain, making my body temperature even colder seemed gripping, plus the strong wind that blew all my paper hvs.

I sat in bed and preferred to open up the phone that I had forgotten for a month, hahahaha😁 how could I forget such an important item.!!

I took a deep breath for a moment I closed my eyes to make sure that I was ready to explore this phone with all the pictures and messages that would appear.

I see the battery is still full there are 500 incoming messages and 2000 missed calls during this one month, meaning that the Val bang has not opened and only charges my phone.

I smiled😊 because I know that Val appreciates the privacy of my phone.!

the first screen appears there is a wallpapper pair of police and a little girl with a childish smile wearing a kebaya sa'at the first day where I ran away from the dorm only to see her in the field until graduation from akpol (or what is his name)

yeah.!!!!! isn't this so harmonious.?

that's my heart but different again from the word of God who does not want to bless us, sad.? yep.! my tears just escaped without my permission.

I opened all the calls there from my friends and family and 133 missed calls from him, the morning before he entered the hospital that I had deliberately not picked up because it was not clear😁, not clear,

more precisely I am suspicious and jealous because he always refused if I force my way both to Mall😂😂.

like stupid.!!

back I open message all from TELKOMSEL😁 3636😂 808😆 and last from Alm. YAL ku😔😔, Japan,

I checked the date turned out to be the morning right where he blew his last breath.!! I saw the delivery at 05:00 in the morning maybe before he took the march to the hospital.!

my hands and lips are shaking,

my breath was snuffling, my,

i'm hiccuping.!

until I could no longer bear the strange sound of crying while reading one by one the messages he sent me.!!

real message YAL

I feel chokedkkkkk..

I am no longer strong with my own regrets..!!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa😭

I'm a stupid fool..!!!!!!!!!!

keep scrooling down, I still get a lot of messages from him again.

the reason she's happy is me.?? that's what I hear every day from him, because he's afraid I'm going to decide😭 I want to tell him not to be afraid "that I really don't have the strength to decide you"

turns out you still got to pay ku😭

breakfast, lots of water, lots of water,

take vitamins, trim invisible hair hemispheres😁 I remember all that.!!

I even do it every morning at 05:00..

stupidly I silenced you for a few days.!!!!!! to my selfishness that hurts your heart and messes with your mind brings a lifetime of regret to me.! I keep reading her messages.

it turns out that due to protecting me, you refused to walk to the mall with me.!!!!😭 ma'forgive me, ma'forgive me😭

fried rice.??

agar-agar.??

your last request is not even one I can fulfill..!!!

stupid stupid stupid fool..!!!!

I cursed myself incessantly only with tears on my cheeks, so late and useless..

obviously to me sa'at there is the greatest longing stored sincerely in the chest, there is a suffocating tightness ! and there's only one name in my heart even I can't guarantee being able to marry her sister even if I'm not forced to love her.

I realized that not only food that can expire because of the limit of use for consumption, there is also a limit of love, there is a time when it must end happily and tragically.!!

Yal..??

perhaps are you part of the wound I missed.??

not all your promises have you broken, until all is like nonsense.!!

then how am I supposed to sa'at this.?

ckckck.!!

I've even foolishly accepted this engagement.

verily I want to rebel and curse everyone who betroth me including bang Val and your dear parents but I know that's what you hate.!!

but again because of keeping the good name of the family and to the two parents, I closed my eyes as if forgetting the good memories between the two of us and the promise that we have said not to turn my heart.

but what I did was far from a deal.!!

I accepted this engagement, even I dressed my face and without a refusal I walked up to it and reached out to put the ring on my ring finger.

I've lost my mind, all clamped down and clueless with my circumstances, they manage my whole life like a remote control.!!

I lost a lot of things dear😔😔

I lost the person who always understood me and understood my every mood.!!

you who used to teach me with a purpose in the future and you also broke the future goals that we set.!!

silent..

so silent.!

I was trapped in a void of heart and slept with all the memories that made me even more hurt.

do you know.??

one month after your departure, baby, I forgot how to smile again, I forgot how to communicate with the people closest to me.!

I don't even know how to open my heart to your proud siblings.!! who was a soldier before you.

god, you are great.!

I'm really jealous of you, however you like you take the person you've tied up with an engagement ring to me.!!