HALAL LOVER (Already Published )

Section 23

~Love can come to anyone, but to whom we will give it never knows it. Most people love because they hate. Every human being is different in the way of love, some are immediately in love and some are initially hated and turned into love. Perhaps, that is what now befell the two men, Ghibran and Azizah. ~

That morning, Azizah was accompanying Ghibran to breakfast, slowly the woman lifted a spoon filled with porridge. But there was doubt in him. He was downcast, just kept bowing unable to see the face of the young man who was now with him.

"Look, bribe me, why are you so timid. Aren't you my wife?" said Ghibran while seeing Azizah who is still bowed.

"Ha, yes." Azizah answered doubtfully.

"Where? Aaaa." Ghibran opened his mouth wide. Azizah slowly brought the spoon containing the ghibran gruel.

"Amm," said Ghibran eating the porridge that had just been fed by Azizah. "Mmm, not good," he continued sticking out his tongue.

"Obviously bad, you're sick again. How, the hell you are," Azizah told me.

"Ah, yes you are right."

Now, they were silent to each other without saying a word. Azizah was still feeding the Ghibran, although in fact the young man was very unhappy with the porridge. But this time he had to eat it for his health.

After finishing eating, Ghibran also took medicine of course assisted by Azizah. The awkward feeling was felt by the woman. Feeding and serving Ghibran. Before, he never did that.

Just as Azizah was about to give a glass of water to Ghibran suddenly, the young man blocked Azizah's hand. Suddenly, the beautiful woman was surprised and turned to Ghibran. Now, they look at each other for a moment. The taste that always bothers Azizah is now coming back. His heart seemed to beat violently staring at the young man before him as well as the hand still held by the Ghibran.

"Let me alone" said Ghibran grabbed the glass still held by Azizah smiling and then immediately gulped it. Azizah simply fell silent as she looked at the young man.

"You think I'm so weak? To the point of not being able to drink alone" said Ghibran, looking at the glass.

"Alhamdulillah, if you have now begun to recover." Azizah smiled and took over the glass held by Ghibran.

"What, can I ask you something?" ask Ghibran. Azizah who was holding a glass turned slightly to the young man.

"What?" answer Azizah.

"Why are you able to accept this match between the two of us?" Hearing the question posed by Ghibran left the woman slightly stunned.

"In fact, I don't even remember being married myself" Ghibran continued, chuckling as if mocking himself.

"Aisha," said Ghibran, looking out the window. Azizah who heard Ghibran say the name Aisha looked up a little.

Sure enough he thought that the young man would still remember his best friend, but not him.

Suddenly, pain ran through the woman's heart when she heard Ghibran. I don't know why he was so hurt and didn't like it when Ghibran mentioned Ayesha's name. Have you started to love Ghibran? But the heart has not fully acknowledged.

The accident experienced by Ghibran also made him become reminded again of the woman he admired, even though his heart began to forget the taste for Aisyah. But now the feeling is back. Although the taste of Azizah had begun to be felt before the accident that hit him.

"Can I be honest?" The ghibran broke the silence between the two of them.

"To be honest, I admire a woman, and would love to justify that woman. But, after I knew if I had been betrothed even married the greatest desire that I should bury, and do you know? I've hurt her by marrying you."

Without waiting for an answer, the young man spoke at length. Azizah could only be silent hearing it. The warm thread managed to escape from both of her beautiful eyelids, without being told. The woman again remembered the fate of her best friend, and guilt seemed to come again on her feet.

"But .. ah, that's all happened. Didn't you?" The ghibran turned to Azizah. The woman hastily wiped away her tears in order for Ghibran not to see her.

"Yes, I know that, even very well," said Azizah. "I'm sorry for destroying the most beautiful desire in your life, but I don't want any of this to happen either. So, what should I do? I just want to make my parents happy, that's all," Azizah continued, saying she was trying to hold tightness in the chest so that tears would not spill again.

"Here you go, everything has happened" Ghibran said, exhaling softly.

"I'm sorry." Azizah went outside leaving Ghibran. The woman sat in the waiting room seat, cupping her hands together. Now, his face was wet because the flow of tears just continued to fall in both of his neutrals.

"Why does it feel so sick, God? This heart was scarred once when Ghibran said he had to bury his will in order to marry me. Why is it so sick, God, why? In fact, when Ghibran called Aisha's name I didn't like to hear her, what's with my heart, my Lord?"

The woman continued to see herself in extreme pain without knowing why. Tears were pouring down his face.

Ghibran was still silent looking at the window which immediately showed the atmosphere outside. Hustle and bustle of people walking saw his eyes until stopped at a hijab woman who was standing outside.

"Aisha, is that really Aisha?" His eyes immediately sparkled when he saw the woman he thought was Aisyah.

"Aisha, I'm sorry. Sure, you're hurt right now. I'm a coward!" peekik Ghibran while banging on the mattress that is being occupied. The young man could no longer control his emotions, feeling guilty towards Aisyah. Tears unwittingly had also flowed on his cheeks. Azizah was still curled up in the waiting room chair.

Slowly, the woman got up and went back into the Ghibran hospital room. How surprised, when he saw the young man could not control himself anymore. Azizah immediately approached Ghibran and tried to calm him down.

"What are you doing, Ghibran? Later you can get hurt," asked Azizah standing next to the bed.

"Let it be, Aisha is more hurt." Ghibran continues to pound the iron support of the mattress. Without a care, his hands started to bleed.

The deg!

The woman's heart throbbed so intensely at the name of Aisyah that Ghibran called. Sick, wounded, now her heart so dislike to hear the name called by her husband. The clear thread fell back in his eyelids.

"Even, enough!" Azizah held Ghibran's shoulder hard, the young man immediately turned his head and stopped hitting the iron.

"So did you love Aisha? Is it possible to return Aisyah to you, huh?! Answer me!" snapped Azizah, Ghibran was only able to fall down.

"No, precisely in such a way it can even make you lose him. Stop being stupid!"

"But, Aisha was so wounded, so hurt, and it was because of me" Ghibran said.

"I know that, I'll help you." Ghibran turned to Azizah.

"You mean?"

"I'll help you get Ayesha back."

"What! Really true?" Azizah just nodded.

"But, we're married how is it possible, I can be with Aisyah."

"You don't have to think about our marriage. After all, this marriage occurs because of arranged marriage and not based on love. Now, just think about your happiness with Ayesha later."

"You— you're a good woman. Thank you e— e ...."

"Azizah, just call Azizah," cut Azizah.

"Thank you Azizah, thank you." Ghibran clasped Azizah's hand, the woman just smiled bitterly.

Although his heart was hurt but still trying to act ordinary. Didn't he love that young man too? So, why get hurt?

''O Allah, is my decision to unite Ghibran and Aisha right? I don't know what else to do because right now in Ghibran's heart it's just Ayesha. Moreover, he now has memory loss. In fact, Ghibran doesn't remember me in the least.''

The hijab-wearing woman continued to sing while looking straight ahead with a blank look. Now, Azizah was on the balcony in front of her room. After yesterday's incident, it left the woman in a state of confusion. His heart also did not fully want all that to happen, even the sentence he said yesterday to Ghibran came out without compromise.

Sick, sore and wounded, now his heart is scratched by a wound that was accidentally made. Although he did not realize fully if he started to love the young man. However, his little heart felt a deep pain. Clear thread has adorned her beautiful face. Empty gaze, making the woman did not care about the voices or the presence of someone nearby.

"Sir." Fatimah gently held Azizah's shoulder. However, not the slightest reaction from the woman might still dissolve in her daydream.

"Sir." Once again, Fatimah called Azizah while gently holding her shoulder. Still, there was no response from Azizah and Fatimah was worried.

"Why are you, nduk?" tanya Fatimah turned Azizah's body upside down. The woman stared quietly at the Umi. Tears had washed his face, Fatimah was very surprised to see the state of her daughter.

"Umi," said Azizah directly hugged the Umi.

"What's up?" fatimah asked confused. However, Azizah simply fell silent and continued to cry without making a sound. "Why baby? Just tell umi, why?" fatimah asked again. Again, there was no answer from Azizah even the woman was sobbing in her tears.

"Cry son, wash away all your sorrow, your weeping." Fatimah gently stroked Azizah's back. Azizah was still crying in her arms.

In a different place, Ghibran was allowed to go home. However, due to his current condition that it is not possible to stay in Azizah's house then the young man returned to live in his own house. Of course with Azizah. But today Azizah gave her permission to go to her house until Ghibran was alone in the room.

Slowly, the young man opened the drawer on his little nightstand. But empty, there is nothing in it anymore. Ghibran was surprised to see him. Ghibran did not remember that some of his belongings had been taken to Azizah's house. I don't know what the guy was looking for.

"Where is the book? I remember how, the book was kept in this drawer but why isn't there?" The ghibran was confused to see that the drawer was empty.

Perhaps the book that the young man was looking for was a book that Aisyah's photo contained in it, which a few days ago was seen by Azizah while tidying up Ghibran's belongings.

"Aisha, how are you? How stupid of me! Why, don't you ever tell me about this feeling to you that it's going to end up like this. My greatest wish is to be your husband, Shah. But, after knowing this reality all of those desires are gone!" Ghibran continued to regret the fate and reality he had to accept in his life. Dreams that have always been hoped for now must be destroyed just like that.

***

"Why, has it calmed down a little?" tanya Fatimah let go of her embrace. Azizah just nodded slowly. "Now, tell us what made you cry like that?" fatimah asked again.

"There is no Umi" Azizah replied lying.

"Don't lie, son. Come on, tell me the same umi."

"Nothing Mi, really." Azizah smiled reassuringly at him.

"What, this is about a Ghibran that's lost its memory?" Azizah turned to Fatimah.

"Not Umi, Azizah was only missing Aisha. Where is she now, is Aisyah okay?"

"God, Aisha will be fine, baby."

"Umi," call Azizah.

"Hey, baby, why?"

"It was only a few days that Zizah came to this house and stayed here. But, now I have to leave this house again and also Umi. Forgive Azizah, huh, Mi?"

"It's okay, baby. It's for your husband's recovery too, umi understands."

"But what, baby?"

"It's okay, Mi. Yasudah, I'm ready for Mi." Fatimah just nodded and smiled.

Azizah went into the room to get her clothes cleaned to be taken to Ghibran's house. Now, the woman must stay in her in-laws' house again until Ghibran is healed and her memory is restored.

That afternoon, Azizah and Ghibran were in a park not far from Ghibran's home. While still in college, they both always spent time in the campus garden, and now both can feel it again even though Ghibran's memory has not returned completely. They sat down with green grass surrounded by beautiful flowers. Even the bright afternoon sky seems to support, orange-colored beautify the sky in the afternoon.

"Zah," call Ghibran who sits a little far away with Azizah.

"Yes" Azizah replied, not looking.

"What, you said in the hospital the other day, for real?" ask Ghibran to make sure he gets back.

"Yes, of course," Azizah replied quickly. "But, after you have completely healed," Azizah explained. The ghibran was confused by Azizah's words.

"Cured?" He looked at Azizah who was still looking ahead. "Aren't I healed? The proof is, the doctor let me go home, right?"

"Yes, but you haven't fully recovered yet" Azizah explained.

"I really don't understand what you mean, I've healed Azizah!"

"What, how much do you love Aisha?" tanya Azizah switched the conversation.

"Yes, because he was my first love. Before, I was very hard to admire a woman even to fall in love with. But, when looking at Aisyah, it felt very different. He was able to make this heart melt instantly, the heart beat irregularly."

Azizah only listened to the words of Ghibran. Actually, there was pain in his heart as the young man let out those words. Telling about Ghibran's love for Aisyah, it deeply scratched the woman's heart. Although several times the pain was suppressed. But still, it cannot be hidden.

"So, that means, you instantly fell in love with Aisyah?" Ghibran just nodded slowly. "Worthy, you love her so much. Because indeed, she is the only woman capable of making you fall in love at first sight."

"Yes, I love her so much that even in silence until finally, I can't be with her."

"Lantas, is that true love?" asked Azizah to look at Ghibran. For a moment they looked at each other.

"You mean?" The Ghibran was puzzled by Azizah's question.

"Yes, what I mean is, is that real love? Loving someone who is not yet lawful to us, what is true love? Doesn't it, loving someone who is obviously mahram and is already lawful to us that is true love. Because, his love is clear in our eyes and in the eyes of God," explained Azizah at length explained. Ghibran was silent

after hearing the explanation from Azizah. The young man was momentarily stunned thinking about Azizah's words. The woman's words touched her heart and mind.

''As Azizah said, the real love is to love someone who is already lawful to us, and I already have that. Why, I am still thinking of another woman who is not my mahram" Ghibran murmured in his heart as he continued to look at Azizah who was still looking ahead.

"That's it, don't think about it." Azizah's words spread the Ghibran Daydream. "Just calm down, you don't need to be afraid, I will definitely help you to get Aisyah back." Azizah turned her head and smiled at Ghibran. The young man was still speechless as if his tongue felt like he was unable to say anything.

"It's late in the afternoon, we better go home soon maghrib," said Azizah stood up from her seat. While the Ghibran still sat down did not follow Azizah's invitation.

"Are you going to stay here, Ghibran?" azizah asked.

"You go first" replied Ghibran, not looking at Azizah. "Later, I'll catch up."

"Hmm, yasudah, I'm ahead." Azizah stepped away. Once in a while, he stopped in his footsteps and turned to Ghibran, who was still sitting in the garden, to his back, and Azizah turned her back to him.

"Azizah, wait," call Ghibran to stop Azizah.

"Yes, what's wrong?" azizah asked puzzledly, stopping her steps without turning to Ghibran as well as the young man.

"Why do you know so much about Ayesha?"

"Because, Aisha is my best friend." Hearing Azizah's reply, the Ghibran was shocked.

"Are there any more questions" asked Azizah.

"No one, you can go."

"Just so."

After Azizah's departure and no longer seen the whereabouts of the woman Ghibran looked back. But Azizah was gone. The young man simply exhaled and rubbed his face rough.

"Aisha was Azizah's friend? That means, I married the best friend of the person I love" Ghibran said.

"Oh my God, why is it like this?" Wiping a rough face, closed both of his eyes.

The young man pensively thought about the words of the hijab-wearing woman yesterday. His eyes were straight forward. Now, his mind was completely disturbed due to Azizah's statement yesterday afternoon. There is doubt in Ghibran's heart to continue his desire.

However, apparently his love for Aisyah who always encouraged the young man to look for Aisyah. Moreover, Ghibran is currently losing his memory so he will not remember anything that has happened a few months ago. In fact, his marriage alone Ghibran does not remember that.

The handsome-looking young man was currently engulfed in his keeogoisan. Getting someone who is a source of happiness for him in any way, he will do. Without the Ghibran knowing that there is a heart wounded because of it.

"Anyway, I'll do it to be with Ayesha back."

Unbeknownst to Ghibran, Azizah was standing behind a large door in the house. A little peek, watching the young man who was standing on the edge of the terrace. His heart suddenly felt a great pain when he heard the words uttered by the Ghibran a few seconds ago.

''What is Azizah, why? Why do you feel sad. Isn't uniting Ghibran and Aisha your wish long ago? Why be sad, what are you sad about?'

The beautiful woman continued to monologue herself inwardly feeling deep pain. However, he has yet to realize his true feelings for the Ghibran. His heart was like a hot iron. Perih, sick, that's what now felt by him. Tears have washed the river to decorate the white skin. Unable to hold back the cries, could only close his mouth with his hands while watching the Ghibran from a distance.

Azizah left suddenly, Ghibran blocked the woman's hand. Azizah stopped from her steps not turning her head immediately. Apparently, the young man knew of his existence there. Azizah was silent. I don't know, it's not usually that woman behaves that way. Usually, Azizah immediately let go of Ghibran's grasp and got angry. But this time not. Instead, he fell silent as if resigned to the situation.

"Azizah," call Ghibran and immediately release the grip on Azizah's hand. Azizah looked down a little.

"Yes" Azizah replied slowly.

"You're here? Incidentally, there is something I want to talk to you about" Ghibran said.

"What about?"

"On Aisha."

The deg!

There was pain in the woman's heart when she heard the name Aisha that Ghibran said. But what can he be? Aisha was loved by Ghibran. Now, Azizah had indeed become the wife of the young man but her love was only for Aisyah.

Hurriedly, Azizah wiped her tears in fear that Ghibran would see it all. What should he say to that man? Should he say if he is currently jealous or more appropriate, hurt.

"Look, sit here, Zah." Ghibran pointed at a chair of teak wood beside him. Azizah was just a manut and sat next to Ghibran. "I just found out, if it turns out you are Ayesha's best friend and now even become my wife."

Does he have to respond to Ghibran? Does Ghibran care about him? Right now, what Ghibran wants is Aisyah is not another woman let alone her.

"Why silence?" asked Ghibran to look at Azizah who was still bowed.

"And, I noticed from earlier that you kept your head down. Raise your face, am I so scary to look at?" ghibran turned to Azizah and looked forward.

"It's not like that, but I'm just trying to be a good wife and manut to my husband." Azizah was still down.

"You mean?" Return to Azizah.

"My point is, is not if a husband is looking at his wife then the wife must bow her face as well as her gaze as a sign of respect and manut to the husband," explained Azizah.

"Then, now lift up your face. Consider it the command of a husband to his wife" Ghibran's command looked down at Azizah.

Does Ghibran really not remember the woman next to him? His attitude is very different unlike that of Ghibran a few months ago. It sucks and it's weird, it's funny, but right now the young man's self seems to be changing.

"All right." Azizah raised her face slowly. "Oh, yes, you didn't want to say anything. Come on, say."

"Yes, I just want to ask if Aisyah came to our wedding?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I don't know either, but maybe his heart isn't strong enough to see the person he loves side by side with his best friend."

"Wait a minute, what did you say? You said the person he loved. That means, Ayesha ...."

"Yes, Aisha loves you too" Azizah said. Ghibran's face was beaming after hearing Azizah's words just now. "I'm sorry, because it has become a barrier to the love of both of you," Azizah continued feeling guilty and stood up to leave. Yet again Ghibran stopped him.

"Where are you going?"

"Back, there's still work I haven't finished. I forgot," said Azizah lying, but everything was done. However, to avoid discussing Aisha, the woman had to lie to Ghibran.

"Oh, yasudah."

Azizah stepped inside the house leaving Ghibran alone on the terrace. Tears were no longer held back, and the warm circle managed to escape. Azizah ran to her room without seeing her mother-in-law sitting in the living room. Aminah was confused to see Azizah's attitude like that.

"What happened to Azizah?" Seeing the confusion of Azizah's departure.

Azizah went into Ghibran's room and closed the door. The woman slowly lowered her body to the floor behind the bedroom door. Tears were flowing from both her eyes.

"Oh my God, why am I? Why, it feels so painful I feel. What's wrong with me? Didn't I intend to unite the two of them. Then why, when all that I can do now why is it so painful, why? Please explain, what is this feeling? What feeling am I feeling? Am I starting to love Ghibran? No way, it's impossible."

The woman grew sobbing in her cries. Both hands hugged both feet. His body began to tremble and Azizah slowly laid her body on the floor in a tilted position.

What kind of fate did that woman experience. When his heart began to accept his marriage to Ghibran even there was an unexpected event like this. Perhaps, with only a sincere feeling, his heart could feel more calm.