Daughter, Matahari..
3. Heartfelt and Patient
Suddenly Mother hung up her words, like there was fear and worry in the look of her eyes.
"Come, Ma. I don't know what's happened to me lately either. There was something different in me, but I didn't think about it much. However, what worries me even more is the nausea and vomiting when I smell a pungent odor" I said in a hoarse voice.
"Are you pregnant, son?" ask Mom with a sad face.
Then I shook my head quickly, because at the moment I have not thought that far.
"I don't know either, Mom. I didn't think that far either, I just thought it was a common cold" I said, leaning my head on Mom's shoulder.
"Then you have to test or check as soon as possible, son. Because I'm just afraid that what you're thinking is happening right now, but hopefully that's not really happening."
A few moments later.
After a while, my mother and I strengthened each other. I rushed to the pharmacy, bought some testpacks, and made sure what Mom and I were afraid of didn't happen.
Then I did as directed there, and with a cautious feeling I waited for the result to come out.
After a few minutes of waiting, I slowly lifted the long, flat object.
And....
"Astaghfiullah!"
"What-what's this?" peekikku with perfectly patterned eyes, now a circle of clear crystals was back wet my cheeks.
Suddenly Mom ran and came to me, when Mom heard my screams from inside the bathroom.
"What's up, kid? Why are you screaming?" ask Mom with a worried face.
With a hand that shook violently, I passed the flat object to Mom, so that Mom could see it for herself.
"Here, Mom. What you're worried about right now is really happening to me. Oh my God why does everything have to happen?"
"Patience, Honey. You have to explain everything that happened. Whatever is happening right now is one of the tests of life for you. Hopefully you can go through everything with sincerity and patience," said Mother who tried to strengthen me.
Right now I'm trying to be strong, when in fact I'm very fragile. How not?
Children who are cared for and cared for with affection. Indirectly and unknowingly, it has been damaged and even destroyed by a savage man who has no sense of responsibility.
Which unsliced mother's heart listens and witnesses for itself, if her daughter is currently two-bodied before having a companion in life.
"Mom, do I have to abort this content? I wouldn't be able to bear this shame, Mom. What do people say later, if the famous quiet Devi is now a wild girl pregnant without a husband?" I said while holding my stomach still flat.
"Astaghfiullah! never think like that, son! Try to learn sincerely, mother will always be beside you dear. So do not ever think to eliminate him (prospective child). He's innocent, the rice has become porridge. So we can only be resigned and sincere to accept all the trials of Allah SWT," Mother's advice when looking at me who is desperate.
"But, Mum. If I keep this baby-to-be, it might be a disgrace to our family. In fact, people will scorn and scorn us, ma'am. Honestly, I'm so embarrassed, ma'am....."
I just asked in my heart 'God why are you giving me such a hard ordeal right now? Will I be able to live out my days?'
Sick? Sure is!
Which mother does not hurt, when her daughter experienced events that she never wanted, even never imagined.
Broken down? Is clear!
Like a glass slammed firmly, then at that time the glass was shattered, and scattered. In fact, the glass is no longer able to be united to be whole again.
Although I continue to regret everything that has happened, but I cannot fight against destiny, unless I alone change that destiny by eliminating it.
Right now, I can only give up. I don't know what I'm going to do, I don't know and haven't thought of it yet.
"You can do it, son. You are a strong and tough woman, so never think of doing the thing that Allah SWT hates the most! Let him live and be present among us, for I am sure one day you will be proud to have him" Mother advised again.
