The Gem of the Heart of the Former Thug

the anger of Budi

Ms. Lusi came home from the hospital the next day. Although not yet declared healthy enough to undergo outpatient, but Ms. Lusi forced to go home. At the hospital, she kept thinking about her late husband.

After delivering to the house, Mrs Ratih then say goodbye. He said that his head had started to feel dizzy, because since yesterday had not slept.

Representing the host, Susan invited Ratih's mother to rest. She thanked him, and offered to drive Ratih's mother home. But Ratih refused subtly. Because he and the Princess brought a motorcycle.

“Please excuse me, ma'am. At all I do not mean to break the love rope between Adel and the son of mother” said Ms. Susan.

“Ah, no papa, ma'am. His name is also ikhtiar. All the results, back to the will of the Creator” replied Mrs Ratih with a smile.

“I can only pray, hopefully mas Budi get the best soul mate”

“Thanks for the prayer, ma'am. Hopefully Luki mas lasting with mbak Adel” replied Ratih.

“Amin” says bu Susan guarantees.

“Excuse me, ma. Assalamu’alaikum”

“Wa’alaikum salam”

Putripun took his mother to go to his motorcycle, and brought his mother home with a heartache. Pilu, because he could not protest at the decision of his former candidate-in-law. Pilu, because he could feel the kind of sadness his brother felt. And how hard the days of tomorrow his brother will live.

They have no taste for eating. It feels bland vegetables that are salted by Bayu. There were so many memories with Adel that flashed in his mind. Romance, suffering, struggle, laughter, joking, crying, all neatly lined up, lined up to form a spectacle.

“Aak!”

Erika took the initiative to bribe her rice to Budi. But Budi did not immediately welcome. Not that he did not like it, but more because he himself had lost the meaning and purpose of eating it himself. She no longer knew what she was eating. There was nothing else he was fighting for.

“Budd. Eat, dong!” erika Pinta. He's getting impatient.

Lucky to open his mouth. So he's not getting angry. Instead, he looked happy when Deni satirized him by pretending to feed Hilda. Rejected by Hilda.

***

Arriving at home, many neighbors came to the house of Ratih's mother. They asked about the rumors about the breakdown of Budi's relationship with Adel. The princess went straight into the house. The sadness that he had been enduring, even as it was kindled by his neighbors.

Mrs Ratih apologized to them. He said that at this time, he felt dizzy from lack of sleep. Mrs Ratih asked for time to rest first. A village elder understood and invited Ratih's mother to rest. He also invited the visiting residents to disperse.

When Ratih's mom came into the house, she saw the princess was calling someone. He looked agitated, and even cried. From his attitude, Ratih can guess who the Princess called.

“Lift dong, mas!” Princess Said.

On the other hand, I don't know. But he chose to let the phone die by itself. His phone rang again, again, and again. But he still refused to answer.

“Budd. Princess tuh, who called. How not to lift?” erika Reprimand.

Budi who was chewing his breakfast, did not heed the reprimand. He just glanced at it for a moment, then looked back in the other direction. He is currently upset with his sister. He wanted to teach his sister a lesson, about what it was like to be ignored.

“Budd. Lift, dong! You have a lot of service debt, same with your sister. Is that time for nyuekin?” scold Erika again.

Budi did not answer. Instead of taking his phone, he instead took the plate that Erika was holding.

“Not the plate, Budi. Pick up that phone from Princess!” adel's reprimand is hard.

They had a look. Although it did not emit an aura of anger, but Budi's gaze still felt sharp in Erika's heart. Hilda alone who was not stared at Budi could feel the sharpness of that gaze. Budi caved. He took his cell phone, then he turned on the loud speaker.

“Halo” greet Budi without greetings.

“Mas Bud, sorryin Princess!”

The voice of the Princess, which was accompanied by a crying voice, made all who heard it feel bitter. Their eating activities stopped. They focus on seeing Budi. He himself closed his eyes.

“Maas. The princess apologized. Dazed princess, mas” said Princess again.

But Budi still did not budge. It was as if his frustration had gone so deep, that he was reluctant to answer. Erika who was upset because of Budi's attitude, immediately pinched Budi's thigh. He surprised her and opened his eyes.

“Maaas. Sorry Princess!” princess Pinta again.

Erika glared her eyes at Budi. It was as if he wanted to force Budi to answer the Princess' apology.

“Iya” replied Budi still with a lazy feeling.

That answer did not necessarily relieve the Princess' feelings. He knew that his brother was still angry with him. But he also did not dare to protest.

“Udah looped his funeral?” ask Budi.

“Udah, mas” replied Princess.

“This Princess is the same new mother back” continued Putri.

“Newback?” ask Budi sewot.

“Iya. Bu Lusi same Madina treated, mas. Only this afternoon was given to go home” replied the Princess.

“Adel?” ask Budi.

Putri stammering. He doesn't know what to answer.

“Astaghfirullohal ’adzim” complains.

His emotions began to crawl up, imagining Adel where and what.

“Maaas” whine Princess.

“Why such an important situation is not princess tawarin to mas Budi? Don't tell me Princess doesn't know!” tanya Budi lirih, but full of emphasis.

“Ngot got the same ibu” replied Princess.

“What? The real one! Why do you lie to Budi?”

“Truly, mas”

“Jawab by being honest! Threatened are you the same rancid man?”

“Make what, try? Not ngebelain mas Budi, even ngebelain rancid man it”

“Maaas. I want to talk” said Putri.

Budi gasp. She did not think that her mother was next to her sister.

“Bud” call bu Train, soft.

Budi not to say. He felt like he was hitting a wall. He wanted to be very angry, but being angry with his mother was impossible for him. Only the sound of his breath could be heard across the phone.

“Ngger. Sorry mom, yeah! mom confesses to all this, because circumstances force mom to admit it” said bu Ratih.

Still not answering. The anger that was on his face. But he tried to hold back his anger. Clearly implied in his breath.

“Ibu” call Budi.

“Iya, ngger” replied Ratih.

“Did you ever see Budi retreat from the field of action?” ask Budi.

Madam Ratih did not answer immediately. He was confused by the question. He looked at the princess. After three dollars, the Princess also did not understand the purpose of her brother's question.

“How many times has Budi been in the hospital, for maintaining self-esteem?” continue Budi.

Mrs Ratih doesn't understand. He was confused as to what to answer, even though he knew how many times his son was admitted to the hospital.

“What do you think, coming home from berlin to pacitan will make Budi enter the hospital? Did you meet the dawn sir yesterday, just as rich when Budi duel Sama Sandi? There will be fighting, there will be police, and Budi will be shot again?” ask again.

Madam Ratih covered her face with both of her palms. Seen once he dizzy faced the questions Budi. It was not that he had no answer, but from that question, he could read, how heartbroken Budi was right now.

“No, ngger” replied bu Ratih, short. His voice was raucous, obscured by his cries.

“Budi never runs away from a challenge, mom. Whatever type. And so many challenges to accept. Budi sure, Budi can convince Mr. Fajar, if only Budi given the opportunity” said Budi.

Mrs Ratih did not say. Only her sobs were heard getting clearer. There was also the voice of the Princess who comforted her mother.

“Adel may be panicking, bu Lusi may not think. Luki? Impossible to think Budi. The one with the greatest potentials thinks, only mother. But I did not ngabarin Budi from the beginning. So sorry mom, I want it. Why, bu?” continue Budi.

“Mas. Don't be the same mom! Just as angry as Princess! Not polite if rich is the same mother” reprimanded Princess.

Budi did not answer. His emotions even felt explosive hearing reprimands from his sister.

“Kalo emang Adel who has turned away from Budi, mother do not need to cover up, ma'am!” said Budi.

Mrs Ratih did not answer. He is still late in his grief. Her crying sounded clearer than before.

“Harta does sometimes make people forget. Realistically, choose the established rather than the struggling ones. Especially if not ready to be the backbone of” continued Budi.

“You are angry with this situation, do not then you are ugly mbak Adel!” snatch from Ratih.

Everyone who heard the conversation was shocked to hear the scene. No exception with Budi. She did not expect her mother would beat her.

“Originally you know, ngger. In his mind mbak Adel, it just you, you, and you again” continued bu Ratih. Budi did not answer.

“You did not touch my father at all, at the last time he was sick. Ma'am Adel has taken care of his father since from home”

Budi was wide-eyed to hear his mother mention the matter of his late father as a comparison.

“He squirms directly how to suffer the deceased when difficulty breathing because most mucus, until it must be suctioned. You never did that, ngger”

Budi's eyes glared as he compared again. But he admitted, it was true what his mother said. She's late. And that was his biggest regret right now.

“It was also mbak Adel did not immediately want when asked the deceased to marry Luki. He kept saying that the father would be healed, and Adel would marry the same mas Budi. Many times he said that. If only Mr. Fajar healed, surely mbak Adel will still insist on marriage with you, ngger”

There was a speck of happiness upon hearing the testimony. At the very least, he still controlled Adel's heart.

“So not because of Luki's property that makes Adel turn away, but more because Mbak Adel has not the heart to wriggle his father more and more suffering. When medical equipment that monitors the vital condition of his father reads all, that's when Adel luluh” continued bu Ratih.

Budi stunned. He knew the medical equipment his mother was referring to. It consists of several separate sensors, which have different tasks. If everyone has given a warning at the same time, it means there is a dangerous emergency.

“His father's condition, is decreasing. Especially when the doctor stated, if the condition of Mr. Dawn, medically it is impossible to recover. All the nerves of his organs are paralyzed. Only the internal organs are still working. The doctor could not be sure how long the organs in the Dawn pack would last. Suppose you are in the position of Mr. Dawn, will you still refuse the last request of mother, ngger?”

*JEDEEERRR*

The long exposition ended with a very sharp question. For Budi, the question is like a bullet that once pierced his back. Obviously the answer is no. Whatever the request, for the sake of devotion and love for the mother, Budi has stated in his heart, that he will comply with the request.

“Astaghfirullohal ‘adzim”

Budi beristighfar as his cry broke. He could no longer argue with his mother. Only anger remains, but I don't know for whom. It still feels hard for him to describe the love that has gone. He still felt that he had the strength, he had the ability, and he had enough resources to fight for an Adel. But the feeling of having it is just a feeling.

Basically he himself was also aware, if he could be strong, it was because of the God who strengthened him. He can be a whiz, it's because of the God who made him win. He can know and date Adel, it is because of the God who fosters that love in his heart and Adel. And if Gusti Alloh does not want, everything he has, in fact does not help him at all.

“Ngger” call bu Ratih.

Still be crying. Make the heart of Ratih's mom more bitter. He wanted to look as strong as he had when he had the release of emotions earlier. But the cry of his son always made his heart sinking.

“Rodhitu billi robbah” said Budi in his sobs.

“Maas” says Princess. He nodded at hearing that sentence.

“Wabil islami diina” Budi continued.

“Mas Buuuud”

The princess cried hearing his continuation. He knows what that word means.

“Wabim Muhammadin nabiyau warosulah”

“Ya Alloh”

The princess was crying harder. He knew from Madina that the sentence was the most complete proof of the grace of a Budi Utomo. The decision Adel made for him. Madina said, that sentence was what her brother said when his body was hit by a hot tin.