TAGGED: SILVER CHESS

18# STRANGERS

I stared at myself in front of the mirror. A bluish-gray blouse with a subordinate black knee-length skirt. My black hair was cut off by a shoulder. Jae's death warning, and at my twentieth year it felt like Jae's whereabouts were close.

The red rose petals in the basket lying around just like that gave off a soft fragrance overshadowing the room.

"Yoo, Kanra, don't be long!" Ryn broke through my room without permission, the shop business was left entirely to Zoel and Urlich. "And after this you're ready?"

"What?" I snorted with rage.

"Ehm, are you ready to take care of a lunatic?" He was clenching while tugging at my hair, "why did you suddenly decide to become a pskiater, anyway? Didn't you say you wanted to be an engineer?"

"I still hope that with this I will be reunited with him."

###

The reason I chose to sacrifice my Engineer ideals was only for the sake of this crazy uncertain meeting. Rue even persuaded me several times to prefer psychology over pskiater. But I keep flinching. For the sake of being in this place. The therapy building for psychiatric patients.

" 119! Psikater with sequence number 119!" The loudspeakers are so deafening. Not my number, hours and hours waiting to be confronted by our first client.

"Nothing?" That voice sounded like a meaningless squeak.

"Ah, your number isn't it? I think your number's reversed, "fuck, I just realized once someone warned me.

" Thank you," I began to step forward through the hall in aluminium. Hope so. This place I'm going to is where Atlaraka is.

###

" You're young" an adult woman ushered in. The building is bluish-white in light filled with meandering invitations and stairs. Every corner was filled with enclosed space. "And not responsible for unprofessionalism. So be careful,"

"Uhm, I'm sorry can I see the list of therapists?"

I wish there was. That name. The name that pissed me off half to death thinking about it day and night.

"Oh, yes, and you can choose the patient to be treated,"

I nodded back, tracing a line of names. Nusantara Atlaraka.

"Please, I beg you," my tears were unbearable with teary eyes, my gaze was held there. " Find me with my first client Atlaraka Nusantara!"

###

Like dream. As soon as he found the barred door the figure was unmoved in its place. His white hair was his eyes staring blankly with gray pupils. The guy was leaning against the window. Both of his arms.

"At-la-ra-la?" Doubtful. That guy ignored me. In his memory he was permanently lost. Painful as soon as I could bear the haunting longing, she forgot me instead . "Hey?"

Atlaraka looked at it for a moment. His gaze was so cold, no, he didn't know me. The annoying grin of loss. Like a corpse lying in a corner.  I think I want to cry.

"Um, meet me, I'm your therapist partner Kanra Anastasia,"

###

"Additional vegetables, Kanra?" Rue put it on my plate. "Oi oi, come on. Don't take it like that much, please,"

I glanced no matter. " Sucks!"

"What's the matter, anyway?" Ryn pops himself up with a plate of fruit salad. "On your job again? Or-"

As Ryn understood the problems that hit not as easily as imagined. 

####

He's still sound asleep. I took the time to leave early and have a special breakfast. There was still no change, sometimes his cynical gaze seemed to corner me indirectly.

I've missed him. My fingers moved touching my eighteenth birthday present pendant with this guy. Maybe it's good to make him forget the past, it's just that I don't want another figure from him. Nope.

Atlaraka moved, blinked and stared at the incoming rays through the cracks of the window. Like a dead body without life. All this time he did not talk at all even looks disgusted and away so close.

"Let's go!" Maybe it's karma.  A severe punishment for my grim mass. Karma for the selfishness I did when this guy learned to understand me. "Come, have breakfast together,"

Without the slightest expression. I stepped on the cold tile.  Keep your distance so he doesn't feel cornered. At least to harbor fear is to get used to accepting my existence.

"Today I make vegetable stir-fries, ah, there's hot water too," I started to self-pure in this kind of pretentious manner.  Atlaraka. "Let's eat,"

Crakk! The meal container I prepared in the morning blind bounced off the floor, falling scattered. "Damn it! You think it's easy to make it? Hey, I didn't sleep to know!"

Shit, release!

For a moment he looked stunned but did not react at all.

Come Talk. Mumbles at least.. That siara.. The sweetness that goes with it.. Speak on..

"Here you go, there's still instant noodles in the bag," I snorted easing the contents of my bag one by one. Rue seemed to have brought it over on purpose as soon as I knew I was going to be overtime. Just holding the cup made me almost cry.

Atlaraca.

"Now eat, eat," unexpectedly reached the object slowly. Staring at it and devouring it directly.

At least he responded well.

"Enak right?" Psychology says meal time and dinner time are the right time to shed a person's side of alertness. I hope he's a little open or at least talk..

Bicara.

Bicara.

"Any," a word, "you're a weird chick,"

"Hhh," damn it, but somehow once the taste was smitten, I felt a little happy.

###

"good right? That way he'll start a new life" look Ryn in the eye there, staring at the crashing waves that look bluish behind the sparkle of sapphire. "Being a normal human being, isn't that what he wants?"

Also true. "That means I should forget about her old self?"

The guy opened his mouth but not for a long time back to meet him again doubtful. The smell of the roasted fish we roasted was oozing; airborne. "Now, eat first, lately you look skinny, Kanra,"

"Thank you" I got Ryn's sodoran.

"If you really like him" the man with the disheveled hair let out a long sigh. "You need to put Atlaraka first rather than yourself. He wants to live a normal life, Kanra,"

Living with normal.

The new atlaraka.

I sighed drowning my head in a hand. Should I start from the beginning? For her new self.

"A, have it. Eat the right, do not be accompanied by all daydreaming events," Ryn ruffled my hair wildly. This guy's asshole. "You worry too much about him and are your brother on this one. You don't care about me, do you?"

I laugh. "Ryn is asking for attention? All this time you've been looking all right, so no one's worried about you,"

"Oi oi oi, ask a little attention is not allowed? Severe," he snorted fieryly. "If Jae finds out he's going to nag,"

We're laughing. Ah, Jae. how long ago I dropped my body on warm white sand. Look at the sky and the clouds. Feels comfortable. Like I'm with my whole family like I'm with Atlaraka..

"This one looks like Zoel," Ryn pointed to space. Her hair is a bit reddish. He dropped the body beside me. "Well, that ugly one looks like Kanra, you know!"

"Damn it!" I laughed, "then the most abstract is similar to Ryn!"

"That's like a magic hat, huh?"

Ah, right too. I looked at him, Lamat. Like that magic hat the guy always wears. Atlaraca. That white blob is isolated in the blue of space. By ourselves. Lonesome.

###

"You're coming again?" Cold as usual. But it's okay, at least more talkative.

I closed the door and nodded. "Eng, it's cold, here,"

"Hh, keep babbling" damn it, he he underestimated me.

"You're cold, too" I hurriedly covered her shoulders with a blanket. If only Ryn hadn't been quick to advise me back then, maybe he wouldn't have been able to be a little patient to deal with this one guy. " Want hot coffee?"

"A-" choked up, he threw his face away. "Do you have tea?"

At first glance I looked at him amusedly. That face.. Never shown Atlaraka before. Yeah, keep doing that. Act like a normal person who is not haunted by that feeling forever.

"Chrysanthemum or lemon?" I poured hot water into a porcelain cup.

And I continue to act like a stranger.

Yeah, keep..

"Am I wrong?" Having my tears money through there was a tinge of worry in his last octave. Is possible? does he care about me again?

"Did I hurt you?"

Miss you.. The same figure but feels different. Same face.same taste and in the same body. Butwhy...

Live normally, Raka..

Forget about my old feelings.. Just bury it all for your next normal life. Yeah, it's okay. I'm doing fine.

Tbc.