Hot Duda: Love For Rangga

Powerless

"While you have crossed eyes or your face is covered in acne, I don't care. I had a taste," singitnya, then he said more slowly, "You know, my love for you is not from the eyes down to the heart."

I nodded, and reminded myself to remain gentle. Giving up, giving up, giving up, that's what I have to do in front of this girl I love. "I don't think like that, really. I just don't want you to suddenly illfeel knowing that I'm-"

"What about vitamins and supplements?"

I jerked. No, my heart is broken. "Related-"

"Why are you lying?" Her eyes are red. "I'm asking for a pregnancy-preventing pill. Why are you giving me vitamins and endurance supplements? Hm? Why?"

Keep your tone, Rangga. Otherwise, he would explode. "Ehm, sorry, yeah. I didn't mean to be evil. I just want to have a child with you."

"Shoppers!" his tears, his tears began to flow.

And that's when I fell down. "Listen to me.." I said softly.

"I don't want to get pregnant out of wedlock!"

"I-i"

"I am cheap!"

"Darling-"

"But I don't want to get pregnant! Enough of me to feel the bitterness of being born without a father. I don't want my kids to have the same fate. I don't want my son to feel the pain of being wasted! You understand?"

I understand, but I can't answer. I nodded my head and gulped bitterly down my sore throat.

"I know," he said a little softened, "you will not run away from responsibility. I know you intend to marry me. But it's still wrong. We never know how fate turns us. Look now, you and I are separated. What if I get pregnant without you? What if I die while I give birth? My son will be wasted, without a father, without a mother. How's it?"

Hold, Rangga. Let him vent his emotions.

"Okay, I was wrong. I was drunk that night. I am cheap and want to be touched. It's not your fault."

I grabbed her hand with the intention of calming her down, but she brushed it off.

"Don't touch me!"

"Darling...."

"Yes, honey."

"Ma-yah!"

"The one."

"Wear M...!"

"Yes, My Ayank."

"It sucks!" Then he glared while holding back a laugh.

I'm relieved. Please, God, I want us to make up. This time, be kind to me, just a little bit.

"Connect, huh?" my door grabbed and clasped both hands.

Sacred shakes. "I can't."

"Why?"

"I don't love you anymore."

"I can't believe it" I said casually.

"Whatever!"

"Is there something you're hiding from me?"

"none. I just can't continue our relationship."

I took a deep breath and tried to stay relaxed, even though it felt like my heart and soul were torn to shreds. "Give me a reasonable reason."

"Nothing makes sense" he said, then he pulled his hand violently. "Our relationship costs many sides. My father died, my mother died before I even got to meet him. My mother, she was depressed because she lost her husband, she also lost her house, the house in Bogor will also be confiscated, she was only given two months to find another place to live. Mama was also depressed because of the information that surprised her." He stopped making a sound as if he had lost his vocal cords. "Mas Raymond's... Raymond refused Didie outright to replace me. The reason is the same, because Didie... Didie also did not qualify for the match. And you know, Didie is now hanging around in Jakarta selling herself for money. He just graduated High School. His future is long. I should have sold myself to pay off Mama and Papa's debts. She's not. Not my sister."

Sleeked. Emotional smoke billowed over my head. How useless I am, I thought.