Gimai Seikatsu's
End Chapter 1 - July 16 (Thursday)
“How many points?”
“38.”
"That .. is a pretty severe result."
“I feel like this is going to happen. I've never been good at it, so I don't think I'll be good at it even here.”
“Although you have good grades in all other subjects? Then again, there are things that people are naturally good or not good.”
“I can't even understand how the characters feel appearing in the story.” He said, taking his eyes off.
Inevitably I blinked in confusion when he said this.
“Because Modern Japanese asks you to define the meaning of a sentence and answer a question about it, I don't think you need to understand the feelings of the characters?”
“For a novel, the meaning of the text is basically the same as the feelings of the characters that appear in it, right? …Well, I realized that I was fixated on an even irrelevant part.”
“Even if that's the case, I can't see how you have such a problem. You always look at other people."
“It looks like that?”
“Yes, at least that applies to me. You understand my stance, my opinion, and try to adjust it.”
“This is the opposite, Asamura-kun.”
"They're behind?"
“I do not understand the feelings of others, so I need to adjust to them.”
“...I think it makes sense.”
As I mentioned earlier, I find it troublesome and very difficult to deal with people who suddenly change mood and ask me to figure out how they feel. This of course was the result of me seeing my parents being played around so many times. I find myself guessing the intentions of others all the time. Following this kind of uncertain communication is like a dice throw with a 10% chance that you are actually ruining your relationship. It is just a game based on pure luck.
That's why I was so relieved when he proposed that we 'have no expectations of each other, just live together while adjusting to each other.' Both of us will soon express our honest feelings, like playing cards with both hands visible . By playing each card in turn, we can continue this card game forever without ever hurting each other.
While this is definitely a good form of consideration for others, if you turn things around, it is simply a rigid and demanding strategy to try to use fragile words to satisfy them.
“To be honest, this may be very bad. I knew it would be difficult, but it was much worse than I expected. ”
“38, yes…? Doesn't the value fail in Modern Japanese 40 points or lower?”
"really. There's a makeup exam on the 21st, right before the summer break. If I don't graduate with more than 80 points, I'll have to take additional classes during the summer break.
“Additional lessons that are irrelevant for university entrance exams.. That is something I want to avoid.”.
"really. That's why I want to pass that exam no matter what. Asamura-kun, your best lesson is Modern Japanese, right?”
“Thanks to my hobby of reading books, yes... So that's why you want me to teach you?”
"Is that too much to ask?"
"Of course not. I'm still indebted for everything you've done, so I want to return the favor.”
"It's good to hear." Ayase-san gave me a relieved smile.
I could see the tension disappear from his shoulder, and he left a short message, "I'll wait in the living room, then," and stepped out of my room. I don't want to think, Yes, it's very similar to him, when I think about it. Instead of losing her composure and sulking in bed without telling anyone, she actively tried to improve the situation, and acted accordingly.
…But that's exactly why I'm plagued by uncomfortable feelings. Why had he ignored this matter until now, when it would definitely cause trouble for him, despite usually being at the forefront of trying to improve himself before. This doubt remained in my mind, but I soon realized that I was wasting my time. Instead, I left my school stuff on my study desk, just brought my stationery and smartphone, and left.
When I entered the living room, I immediately saw Ayase-san sitting at the dining table surrounded by workbooks and notes. There was even an answer sheet that barely opened in front of him. He held the pen in his left hand, staring at the objects in front of him. As an additional note, and I heard this from him myself, but Ayase-san is actually left-handed. As a result of her parents' education, she ended up holding the chopsticks with her right hand, but because she was used to writing with her left hand, she used them more actively.
If this was some kind of manga, she would invite me to her room, and some kind of erotic development would happen, but this is reality. It was a very normal situation, and Ayase-san was just focusing on the matter in front of her, which told me that even thinking of something more than that happening was completely ridiculous. After pondering for a moment, I finally sat across the table, facing Ayase-san.
"Aren't you sitting next to me?" She asked.
“I think it would be a little weird if I did that.”
“When your Mom and Dad are home, we always sit next to each other, right?”
“I feel the condition of the situation is completely different if you compare it with this one.”
"Thank you?"
“Really,” I replied without hesitation, and was actually quite confident about it. But when I saw his empty and dry expression, I began to hesitate.
I tried to consider, showing him that I would not use this opportunity for any indecent ideas or fantasies, but maybe I was just inconsiderate and in the process. I think not showing any awareness or awareness of him as a member of the opposite sex is best, but the person in question is a little too attractive for me to actually do it.
Naturally, I am not only raving about my personal interests, but this is a reality based on objective discussion. Despite all the bad rumors circulating around the school, there were still many boys who fearlessly confessed to him. This should certainly be sufficient evidence to justify my conclusion.
The memories of last month are still fresh in my memory. He came to a rather strange conclusion while rationally considering ways to earn money quickly and easily. Her appearance that approached me while wearing nothing but underwear still occasionally appeared in my mind.
Naturally, during my daily life, especially with him around, I was not very aware of him (because if I kept thinking about it 24/7, I was not so aware of him, I am nothing more than an ape driven by worldly passions), but when it is only the two of us in moments like these, and our distance shrinks beyond a certain threshold, the, these memories come back quickly. I can't help.
"Hey, despite the promise to forget about it, why is it still a problem?"
“Hah, really?” It seemed like my mind was being read by Ayase-san, and I let out a dumbfounded response.
I don't remember promising anything. I just swore to myself that I would try my best to forget about it, but Ayase-san should not know anything about it. Thinking something was wrong, I glanced at Ayase-san, who was looking at me, looking confused.
"of course. Then again, it is quite short and sudden overall, so it may be a bit difficult to remember.”
“I'm sorry, Ayase-san. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.”
"Pulling yourself together. You are good at Modern Japanese. Right, Asamura-sensei?”
When he said that, I realized that he had pointed to a certain part of the question sheet in front of him, which made me understand what was going on.
"…I understand. Topics changed without me knowing.”
“No? I have been working on this issue all the time.”
“Sorry, I was just on the wrong thought path there. Let's start, okay?”
It seems he has started to learn. He did not reproach me for the indecent visions and memories that filled my mind, but instead asked me about some of the problems he did not understand.
"thank you. Then, for this question..”.
“Ah, wait. I would like to start by proposing another way of learning. Can I do that?” I asked.
"of course. Anything that will help increase my value will be very welcome.”
“Then, I want to check which parts of Modern Japanese are problematic. May I see your question and answer sheet?”
"Yes. Here it is.” Ayase-san offered me the letters without hesitation.
Compared to his outer appearance, looking like a delinquent with blonde hair and ear piercing, he was actually an honest and courteous disciple. Looking at the paper with a giant red '38' inscription on it was truly an incredible sight. I cannot pretend to think that this is a lack of understanding, a lack of ability, or a lack of effort. I believe that there must have been a much deeper explanation as to why he couldn't get the points he usually earns, he said, that is why I cross-referenced every little nook and cranny of the paper to find this reason. And then I found it.
“You are fine in terms of reading comprehension and kanji used in papers and articles. You lose the most points when it comes to reading novel comprehension.”
“...Yes, that's what I have a problem.”
“This might be the first time you actually got a failed grade like this, right? Because the distribution of points weighs more on the understanding of novel readings. ”
"really. Then again, I know that myself. ” She shrugs. "I just couldn't find a way to deal with it."
“Your accuracy in terms of correct answers is higher at the beginning when working on papers and articles, but two novel-related questions later, when there are other paper questions, you leave them blank. Is it because you spent all your time on questions related to the previous novel?”
"You speak as if you were there when it happened."
“So I was wrong?”
“Just on target. It feels like you stabbed me in a sore spot, and it makes me a little uneasy.”
I could see a bit of it even though his expression was blank.
"Sorry, I think I'm a little insensitive."
“You're forgiven. Then again, I'm asking you to teach me, and you're serious about it, so I shouldn't sulk like that. I'm sorry."
"Everything's fine, now we're balanced."
We still kept the promise we both shared when we were just a family. Do not ignore anything, do not be too long-winded, just adjust it to immediately correct any mistakes. That's the relationship we've built. We did not show any change in our emotions with just our facial expressions alone, we immediately explained unpleasant emotions or situations, which made it very easy for both of us.
"You're right…"
“You didn't realize it?”
“I'm too busy actually trying to solve the question. I remember feeling like it was much harder and harder to do than any other question.”
"So, you don't realize that this is an important part of it, I understand."
Exams are pretty much about establishing rhythm when solving problems. As long as you are a human working by hand, your mental state can drastically affect your results. If you solve the problem, your brain is in a state of excitement, your hands begin to move faster, and of course, your pen flies across the paper.
On the other hand, if you get stuck in one part, your hands stop, as does your brain and thought processes, which then cause stress, stress, and this stress leads to a decrease in your ability to think rationally. In other words, to achieve the best results in exams and tests, you must stabilize your own mental state and solve questions and problems without getting out of your rhythm.
—At least that's what I read in the previous book. Because I was so impressionable, I always took the exam exactly as the book told me. I categorize problems I can solve immediately, problems that take a little time to think about, and problems that I have to think about a lot, then I create a comfortable rhythm when working on the problem sheet.
“Since you are a very logical and clever person, Ayase-san, I think unless you don't fully understand the question or problem, you might feel uncomfortable. You quickly solve problems that you can answer easily, but you can fixate on other problems forever.”
If this assumption is correct, then it could explain why he is this bad in Modern Japan without having to fix or fix anything. His head judged that he was trying to solve the problem in the right way, and that was the wrong judgment.
"I understand." Ayase-san nodded. "When it comes to other subjects, I feel like I'm subconsciously solving a question instantly."
“Basically, when talking about Modern Japan, and in particular analyzing novels, there is a reason why you can not deal with it.”
“Reason, you said.”.
“If we find that reason, we can come up with steps to deal with it. First, let's take a look at 'Sanshir' and try to find out what the problem is.”
I checked the part they used in the exam. Since making the whole book part of the question would be too much to ask students, they only ask questions about a certain quote from 'Sanshir'. In all the works of the famous Meiji Era writer, Natsume Soseki, this has a strong touch of a romantic novel, which made it famous as one of the more readable novels by high school students today.
Even for people who are not too familiar with literature, because it raises the problems and reality of the citizens as a stage, sympathize that makes it stand out. You could call it a trendy drama at the time it was written. At its core, it is not much different from modern romance novels in general.
If you had to mention a certain difference, then it would be his acceptance and sincerity towards the time it was written, which made it even accepted as the material used for the study of history, to a degree where even the problems associated with it have been applied to students' workbooks, and used as educational novels. Of course, that is not the only example, but being an educational novel is a great achievement in the literary world. It's worth respecting, honestly.
“Honestly, that's pretty hard. Although everyone else from my class has no problem in dealing with it from what I can see.”
“‘Sanshir’ is quite advanced, and it contrasts one's freedom in love with the norms of love at the time, which consisted mostly of political marriages. At the time it was written, it was still a new view of love, but people today find many aspects of it easy to understand.”
"Thul? …I want to know what is so easy to understand.” It must have been involuntary, as Ayase-san gently bit her finger.
“I think it will be faster if you just try to say what you don't really understand, Ayase-san. Can you give me something?”
“What does protagonist Sanshir think, and what Mineko thinks of as the female lead hero. Let alone their thoughts, I don't understand why they act that way.”
“For starters, you are aware that Sanshir has feelings for Mineko, right?”
"Thank you?" Ayase-sasn blinked her eyes at me confusedly.
He didn't seem to have anticipated that, but I should have made that face by now. I am pretty sure that even without as much reading experience as I have, a normal person would be able to figure it out by reading it casually. Especially a girl like her whose results even surpass mine in all other subjects except Modern Japan. This is too unnatural.
“If you get stuck there, it makes things a lot more complicated. Hmm... How should I explain it?”
“Feelings... Basically, she likes it in a romantic sense, right?”
"Exactly. Although his writing slightly surpassed and surpassed the portrayal, his staging was greater than it actually was. Just look at the times when other men approached the main heroine. You can conclude that the protagonist is jealous, right? ”
“Jealous... So she hates the idea of Mineko talking to another man?”
“At least that's how I see.”
“But he didn't tell her to stop, did he? He could have said that he didn't like the idea.”
“Well, she has an insecure and awkward personality that doesn't allow her to do that. Also, when you talk to people you like, I think the psychological hurdles and fatigue are much greater.”
“Hide your honest feelings without ever saying them. Probably because I didn't do that at all.”
“Let's imagine a situation where you can't openly express your honest feelings. Like your feelings for your first love. Have you ever had an experience when your heart was so muddled with romantic feelings that you couldn't find the right words to say?”
"No. I have no experience with love to start.”
"I understand…"
“How about you, Asamura-kun?”
“...Now after you mention it, I guess I am the same.”
More precisely, before I could even acquire the right thoughts for love, I heard that I proposed to my kindergarten teacher. Then again, that's what my parents told me, so whether or not it actually happened is debatable. So I'm not going to count it. After going to elementary school, where I still have some things I can remember, the only thing I remember is seeing my parents fight a lot, she said, which led to me never actually dreaming of having a romantic relationship with a girl that could lead to marriage and family building.
"Hmm, so you don't."
"…Is it bad?"
"Not really. I just thought that, if you don't have experience in love like me, it might explain that this has absolutely nothing to do with my value in Modern Japanese.”
“Yes, it's strange enough to think where things start to differ between us.”
Maybe it's just my otaku tendencies? I don't remember ever actually imagining dating a girl in reality, but thinking that the heroine of the manga or novel I read, even the anime I watched, she said, being pretty cute and charming has become something natural to me. It seems I made up for my lack of realistic experience with fiction experience.
Because of this, I feel it would be a reasonable hypothesis to assume that this accumulation of knowledge led to my greater ability to capture depictions of romantic feelings in certain media. Therefore, this conclusion will not help me in improving his learning ability to a level where additional exams are possible. On the contrary, if I were to say this to him, it would make me fail to become a private tutor. My only option is to find a constructive method for his progress.
“Then, let's give up on understanding their emotions. If you can't know their emotions, then there's no point wasting time on it.”
"So what, we're gonna start guessing at random?"
"Not really. Confirm the contents of what is written on the paper as a single stream of information, and answer it mechanically. Basically, you have to change your perception of it.”
“Change my perception? Why?"
“Because if you force yourself when it comes to questions that require you to read and understand the human heart, it results in you ending up in trouble. Compare that to math, where you apply a mathematical formula to solve a problem, working on it like a puzzle. Ayase-san, you are getting quite good results in History, right? So you should be told about that? ”
“Yeah, I guess. You just have to learn everything by heart. There are also some very interesting parts.”
“The problem is, if you put contextual threads on a historical background written in Modern Japanese works, and associate the two, then it may be easier to understand what is actually written in them. If you're good at History, and you're making a logical connection between the two, you're instilling in you a way of thinking that benefits this process, and you might be able to understand what questions are being asked of you.
Of course, it was much easier said than done. However, given its basic statistics and specifications, it is worth considering this possibility.
“Yes, it might be more suitable for me.”
“For now, let's train with Sanshir. I don't know if they'll use it again for additional exams, but the questions and the overall number should follow the same pattern, so if you have your own way of dealing with the matter, then, You must be ready to face it. day."
“...Can I really make it?” He spoke in an indifferent tone, but I was able to catch the doubt in his voice.
I should have been able to say this precisely because I became better at understanding that person, so once he said that, he clearly showed a certain amount of anxiety. Of course, it made a lot of sense, as he was always aware that this was one of his most problematic subjects. But at the same time, this reaction simply confirms that everything will work out in the end.
Ayase-san is not too naive to assume that everything will benefit her just because she found a trick to overcome her problem. Instead, he was the type of person who took a detour to reach his ultimate goal in the end.
"You can do it, Ayase-san."
"Yes. I will trust you, Asamura-kun, and try my best.”
Of course, there was no basis or evidence for anything here. However, there was no doubt or scathing comment at all that was evident from Ayase-san's reaction. Instead, he said it like he really meant it, and he went on to look for historical background and comments about Sanshir. Now that the plan was executed, all that was left was to push it.
After that, his focus on his work was almost astounding to me. He did not blink once, he just looked through anything related to Sanshir like a machine searching the internet. Well, it would be a little overdone, but his dedication made me imagine something like that.
As he studied, I would wake up to prepare a drink or look for something else on my phone, yet he never glanced at me in the slightest. He just focused on the task at hand. If you think about the typical events that occur in fiction, there will be a little sister who has not mastered the basics, working hard for you. Or there will be another little sister who will start giving you a little service because she cannot sit still for a long time. But the real stepbrother in front of me is currently excited about his studies.
Even so, even without such erotic developments, I simply enjoyed the calm atmosphere that existed between us, as I only listened to the sound of her pen scratching the paper.
To start from the conclusion—This learning method produces amazing results. After he finished researching all the information regarding Sanshir that he could find, I asked him the same question from the exam, with the exam sheet in hand, and Ayase-san managed to give me an answer at all times, she said, everything is right. . He's really smart. Once he knew how to solve the problem, he immediately went further.
"Congratulations. If you use the same method on all novels that are part of the subject, you need not fear at all.”
"thank you. Your teachings are very helpful.”
“...!” Ah, well, it's not a big deal.”
For a moment, my head went blank and I returned to polite language. The corner of his mouth rose slightly as he thanked me, which surprised me.
"Have you just smiled?"
"I'm curious. I myself am not too sure.” Ayase-san shrugged, looking a little confused.
Ironically enough, the mysterious movements that I could not understand its origin were very similar to those that the heroine Sanshir would make. The same Sanshir who had made Ayase-san difficult before.
