Feeling Attack's

19. Stay close to him

Caca frowned at Mentari walking back and forth in her room, this thirty-year-old woman looks anxious with her right thumb nail that she bit five minutes ago.

"You're staying here tonight, aren't you ?" Ask Mentari expectantly. Because Mentari was asking for permission from Mentari to return to Nana's house because tomorrow he entered work.

"Tomorrow Caca work in the morning brother, the boss was chat Caca was told to come in tomorrow."

"You're a permit again." Caca glared, rich people are really good if you say so. Asal play said just don't think about the consequences.

"If Caca permits again automatically Caca's salary is cut dong." protested Caca.

"You take it easy, Reza's an acquaintance of my husband, ent-"

"Sister, this is not a matter of close acquaintance or not. But it's a matter of my responsibilities at work, what my other coworkers say, if I permit a few days but my salary is still full. That's not fair, brother." Cut Caca explained.

Mentari sighed in apology softly, then looked at Caca intensely as if to suggest disrelief, fear, immortality. The look made Caca shiver. Something is wrong with this family.

Mentari then walked slowly closer to Kila and took a place next to Caca, where he saw Caca's two black eyes fixed. "There's one thing you should know," Mentari said with a trembling voice.

Caca nodded. That's why he's sitting in Mentari's room and Revan's now, waiting for what Mentari really wants to talk about with such a serious look.

"We're sick."

There is no sound since Mentari said two words that Caca never imagined would come out of the figure of Mentari who had been known Caca very jolly, humorous, and also ignorant. Pain has many meanings and Caca believes every human being in this world must have felt pain. They never had a cure for that pain for a long time, maybe even forever. Pain that never heals has many forms even many names.

Some might call it revenge, others might call it trauma, and others might call it fear. Every human being is sick, that's what Caca believes.

"What does Mentari mean ?" Tanya Caca made Mentari's hand outstretched, then tightly grasped the two fingers of Caca's hand held on her thigh.

"Since the accident," Mentari paused as she took a deep breath. "We're all sick." Mentari's eyes are already glazed. Little by little the clear liquid dam will break.

Clear fluid coats the reddish eyes of Mentari as if to convey to Caca what was felt during the accident.

Those eyes were the eyes that witnessed how his dear sister gave up her life on the Mentari's choice. The eyes are the eyes that see how the greatest woman in the world, Mama. Return to the Creator without farewell. The eye witnessed how her papa's attitude drastically changed and chose to immerse himself in his business out there, eyes that witness all events after events that make this house must be installed CCTV on each side.

"I once had bipolar," she said in a quivering voice "And I'm healed, because Revan was always by my side, and I finally improved..."

The broken Mentari's cry could not continue his sentence. Making Caca reflex hug her and rub the pregnant mother's back gently, trying to calm her down. No one can be a hundred percent cured of loss, because every memory will emerge that is ready to harden the sincerity that has long been formed in accepting the destiny of life.

When the cry of Mentari was heard began to subside and his breathing was back in order. Caca kept her head off Mentari's shoulders and helped the woman wipe away the trail of her tears that were spitting makeup off her pretty face.

Caca looked at Mentari softly, he would not ask. Because everyone needs a different time to be able to recall his bad memories and tell others.

"We've been counseling for five years, Ca. Papa calls people to come to the house not only teachers, but psychiatrists. At first, Orion and I followed everything you gave me. But, when I went to college and got to know Revan, Orion started not following me and also papa.

Caca nodded at a glance, giving the code that he understood everything Mentari described.

"When I was twenty years old and close to Revan, Orion began not to want to be called Orion, he asked me to call him with Heaven. Even angry every time I call him by the name Orion—the nickname mama used to call him. And strangely, every time papa came home, he also called him by the name of Heaven. I always asked him why he changed his nickname, but he never answered.

"When I got close to Revan, seventeen, Orion entered public high school and started meeting a lot of friends. But when I met his friends, they said Orion was weird and liked to change all the time. I think Orion is like me who was bipolar. But after consulting with our psychiatrist, he had other symptoms of the disorder. He has a threshold personality."

"What-what ?" Cut out Caca, before getting a longer story. In addition to the fact that Mentari had bipolar— and fortunately has been cured—although Caca is not sure what bipolar is. Caca really doesn't know and needs to know first what a threshold personality is. Is that dangerous ? Is it contagious ?

"Orion has symptoms of borderline personality disorder. People with this disorder are very afraid of being abandoned by loved ones. When that fear comes, he will get angry suddenly or ask for things that do not make sense. Even committed suicide."

Ah, Caca forgot, she has a personality disorder, she must often have trouble controlling herself. That is why every time, the man is always changing, be it his behavior or emotions and he is also incomprehensible sometimes. Like this incident at noon, for example.

"Ever now, he committed suicide four years ago, when I said I was going to marry and live with Revan. That's why now this house is installed surveillance cameras," Mentari said while glaring.

"Why...Don't be angry, brother, Orion's not on medication ?" said Caca changed the word mental hospital into medicine. To be more polite. He also did not want to admit indirectly that he was trapped with people who could not even control themselves. The common people call it crazy.

"He doesn't want to hear anyone, Ca." Mentari said with a soft "But she changed since you were present."

"Huh ? Me ?" Show Caca to herself while looking at Mentari not understanding. "What's wrong with me ?"

"Maybe it was because of a small event that happened between you, during that little collision."

"Wait, Orion said brother was traumatized by the accident, right ?" The mentor nodded "Then why would he dare to drive ?"

"When he was nineteen years old, he told Orion to drive a car, he was trying to learn to eliminate the trauma of the accident. And little by little it works." The mentari took his breath. "But since the little crash yesterday, it's been the last day he's driven a car."

Caca was surprised "Why ?"

"The trauma was back again, the night after the incident. Orion has a high fever while delirious. The next day he told Mr. Asep to be his personal driver."

"Sorry brother, Caca ngga-"

"It's okay, you didn't know the truth at the time." Say soft Mentari. "Can you move in here ?"

Caca glared in surprise. "I mean brother ?"

"You stay here from now on." Mentari Exclamation.

"Sister, if to sleep tonight Caca can, but if to stay here Caca can not. Caca doesn't feel good to my friend. Nana."

"If it's a problem, let me take care of it. Tomorrow you're with me I'm talking to Nana."

"Sister." Whine Caca.

"Caca please," she asked. "Tomorrow, papa's coming from London. And I don't know when papa's here till when."

Caca frowned "Son needs you here, to calm down Orion."

"Sister, I'm a regular human being. I do not know about...interference.what was it ? Threshold ? I don't understand, I don't know what it is, I don't know what to do, ak-"

"Listen to Ca!" sela Mentari with a high tone made Caca blink in surprise. "I want to ask you to convince Orion that what he's doing is not right. I want you to make sure that he stops being someone else. You don't need her to go to a psychiatrist, you don't have to give her therapy, just..." The mentari sighed.

"Just stay close him."

***

»»Bipolar disorder is a mental disorder characterized by drastic emotional changes. A person suffering from bipolar can feel the symptoms of mania (very happy) and depression (very bad).

»»Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) or borderline personality disorder is a mental disorder characterized by mood and self-image that is constantly changing, and impulsive behavior.

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