Exchange Myself for Justice

Chapter 7

I started taking off the veil straps in front of my friends. As soon as they were stunned looking at me, I was a little surprised to see their reaction.

"This is my face."

"God, how beautiful you are Zahira!" shout them simultaneously.

"Alhamdulillah. You guys are also very pretty," I replied honestly.

"But you are indeed very beautiful Zahira. It's better that you use a veil, because I think anyone who looks at you will fall in love. I'm a fellow girl who really admires your beauty," said Ms. Marni.

"Subhanallah thank you, Ma'am. Udah, ah do not need to discuss it again, I'm so embarrassed, Ma'am."

While we were talking, suddenly my head was dizzy. I tried to hold him. Want to rest soon, but they're still here, it's not good to leave.

After the magrib my friends have gone home leaving the contract. I immediately broke down, it felt like today my body was very tired. When I want to sleep, I feel my stomach nauseous. I immediately ran into the bathroom, spilling all the food in my stomach.

"Why can I get sick and dizzy like this? Did I catch a cold." My own murmurs immediately cleared away the remaining liquid on my lips.

I returned to relieve a moment of fatigue. However, my thoughts were stretched, I remembered that my two months monthly guests had not come.

I quickly got out of bed with all my thoughts. Anxiety is running through my heart. No, this is impossible. I can't possibly get pregnant, she only did it once.

Long time I daydream in this room alone. I tried to comfort myself, but my heart could not be lied to that I was really worried right now.

I stood up and returned to wearing my covered clothes. I went to the pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test kit. After getting me back into the contract.

In this bathroom I wish everything I'm worried about wasn't real. With a pounding heart I tried to dip the flat object into the urine I had collected.

Again I had to swallow the bitter pill of a destiny I was living. I hope I don't match reality. I'm Pregnant. Yes, I was again hit by the waves of life that might be more difficult for me.

I cry, but I don't want to be too late in grief. Somehow my feelings warmed when I imagined that there was a little angel in my womb. Is this God's plan so that my life is not lonely.

I may have hated the Judge, but not the innocent baby in my womb right now. Well, I'm not going to make this kid a burden. I will take care of her and take care of her with all my heart.

I wiped away the tears, and I gently wiped my flat stomach. "I'm sorry Umi yes, son, sorry if your presence later does not have nasab. It's all Umi's fault that you will be present without Dad.

For now I have to hide my pregnancy until the time comes, then I will leave this place. I will all live with sincerity. I don't want to complain anymore or be a whiny woman.

I must be strong, aware that there is a life that I must protect with all my body and soul. I must be a strong person, because I live alone, so I do not want to be weak against the cruel world that is full of the death of life.

The days I spent as usual, my pregnancy was not a burden, even though I had to hide it from everyone. I knew one day they'd find out about my pregnancy. Also, I am ready to accept the risk if I have to leave this place. It's okay as long as my soul mate's future baby will stay with me.

This afternoon when I was just getting home from work, a car stopped in front of my contract. I wonder who came to see me.

"Assalamualaikum," greeting someone.

"Wa'alaikum... Mas Adri, what's coming here, Mas?" I asked as I walked to open the door.

"Speak what, Mas? We just sit here, yeah, sorry it's just not nice to see people when we talk inside," I'm obviously feeling awkward.

"Yes, it's okay, Za, let's just talk here."

"So soon I'll make you a drink, Mom."

"That's okay, Zahira, I won't be long, just for a little while. I'm afraid I'll grow slander if we talk too long. I don't want people to look at you unkindly" he explained. Turns out he's a very nice guy he doesn't want to get me in trouble.

"Well then, what does Mas Adri want to say?" manyu begin.

"Zahira, I came here to ask you to be my wife. Are you ready? Somehow since the first time we met, I've had a taste for you" he said, leaving me agape in disbelief.

What should I say to this nice guy. I can't possibly accept it. Especially with my situation now. I was confused to answer. But inevitably I had to reject her, well aware that I was not the lucky woman.

"Sorry, Mas Adri, I cannot accept your request. I wish I could get a better and more perfect woman than me."

"May I know why you rejected me?" the man looked at me in disappointment.

"The reason is only one, Mas. Because I don't love you."

"But if it's about that, we can still know each other first. I'm willing to wait until your heart is ready" she explained.

I really feel guilty. If only we had met my current situation. Maybe I didn't take long to think about accepting it.

"One more time I'm sorry, Mom, I can't."

He stayed silent for a long time while looking at me. I dare not return those shady eyes. There was a deep sigh in his chest cavity, The man was holding back the disappointed roar of heart.

"Yes, I know feelings can't be lied to. Well, thanks for your time. I'm also praying that you get the good guy you love. Then excuse me. Wassalamu'alaikum."

"Wa'alaikum..."

I stared at the straight back, it was gone from my sight.

The man I love? That I don't dare dream of loving someone, Mas. If only you knew how ruined my life was right now, maybe you would never express that feeling.

There was a sense of sadness lingering in the heart that wanted to provoke a cry. But soon I got rid of it, I didn't want to mentally damage it and burden my morale. Now I have a purpose in life, which is to take care of and care for my heart with all my soul.

Yes, I have to be a strong person for my son. I can't go out and bring feelings. Whatever it is I will walk with a calm heart and mind. To keep this little angel healthy in my womb.

Seriate...

Happy reading 🥰