DESTINY IS NOT WRONG

INTERPRETATION OF LOVE AND DREAMS

 I pack the past and hope on such a fragile backrest. The more hope I held the same as grasping the sand, the harder the fingers clenched, the more sand was lost. Funny, I expect a man who himself is restless in his fragility, demanding dreams in humans who himself can never have a prolonged dream, at most only 6 hours. Leaning, on the fragile wall is the same as me picking up my own death, the ruins will drown my body later.

Arrahman, where I embroider eternal love in the thread of the kalam verses that I myself feel cool when chanting those verses. I deny with gratitude the blessings God has given me. And letting this heart continue to hurt, I realized this in his name, hurt myself to shackle my common sense about the love that I consider to be misinterpretation.

Choosing to be a melted candle, without thinking about yourself and trying to be a light for others, will the candle be remembered?! Heem, sought only when needed, what is this called his love and sacrifice?!

Begin to forget human love that is only nisbi to me, eroded the belief in human love that is never eternal, unstable and lost direction, too early to judge that our life companion is true love. True is what I know, pure and unmixed with others, soul and spirit in life, then can it still be said to be true if the level of love is variable and not fixed?!

This is the time, I straighten out the interpretation of love mejewalah through the walls of Lahul Mahfudz in Suratul Al-Mulk, I take refuge in the destiny that I still follow as to what the path of my life will be, about the soul mate who has been extinct, about the death that I myself could not accompany father when stretched his life, and about the sustenance that until now I hope to change it all. In fact, even that new chapter I don't know when it will start?!

Honestly, this is the time when I knew what God wanted, I sought proof, “Surely God said: "I am as my servant preaches to Me. I am with him if he prays to Me.”There is no other way, one way to make peace with Destiny is only prayer and patience, hijrah to be a person who fears. The reward of obedience, Allah will make all things easy, and I believe that.

Right, after performing the Tahjud and Penitent prayers everything that makes us impossible is not with what God thinks is possible, as usual after the prayer I read two letters that became favorite reading in the Qur’an, namely Al-Mulk and Ar-Rahman. My phone rang, and it was on the LCD display that said Febri Valentino, the production team who would later work on a feature film taken from my novel,’Between Germany and the Grand Mosque’and this is the veil of dreams that I have been waiting for two years ago. The answer to a long journey.

“Mas, fighting is very difficult to connect!” For the umpteenth time a producer Febri Valentino said like this, and it was my habit to rarely pick up the phone because I often silance.

“What's wrong?! Tumben phone!”

“Yaaah, means if I phone there is good news...Hahahaha!” Interspersed laugh.

“What kind of good news is this?!” “Film ready we work.” “Alhamdulillah.”

“By the name of PH Belunni Entertainment, butiiiii..

“What is tuuuh mas?”

“Mas Haidar create scenario for his trailer.” As a first step they asked me to make a movie triller scenario or footage of the entirety that will be aired. So, I should look for scenes that have enough power in the story, but should have a strong promotional weight.

“OK! Siaaap.

This is what I lack to make a screenplay, and I never touch at all how to make a movie screenplay what it looks like. Nothing is impossible, I can learn a lot from the internet how to write a screenplay, and I started browsing.

“Usakan one week the scenario is complete huh mas?” Pinta the producer.

One challenge for me, one that I have to solve and to understand the ins and outs of the scenario is not an easy one.

“Insyallah, one week have I sent ya mas?!”

“OK.”

As the phone closed, I tried to figure out how to write the screenplay. And all I found was the important terms, there was no example of a movie screenplay. Fuuuh, enough mind drain. And finally with the capital of terms in screenwriting I try to find the core of it all, by understanding the way of writing and examples of scripting scenarios that I find.

I have to do extra work to reopen the novel sheet ‘Antara Germany and Masjidil Haram.’ The only way to find the climactic and anti-climactic side and one scene that represents the content and idea of the story, this is what I have to understand, in order to produce a quality film, which is really good, at least close to the big screen film that has exploded in the market.

Something surprised the producers when I told them about the screenplay I had ordered to complete within a week, and they knew that I could write a novel. For me, only those who do not want to learn and use the facilities include losses. With my age

 it is said to have been almost at the end of adolescence, very sorry because I still wasted the pleasure of this life.

If only time could repeat itself, maybe I have a lot to fix in managing life and being a meaningful person. There is no greatest regret, if you see those who do not have dreams and ideals in their lives, waste time in vain. By Allah, I am still sorry for the rest of my life but there is little I can do to be able to work. And I was jealous of a young writer, presumably five years adrift with me, he succeeded with his works are always best seller.

“He ate rice and I also ate rice, he had a chance the same time. But why can he and I still be like this?!”

My heart is racing, there is nothing I do but write, write and write, work, work and continue to work. Almost, my days are nothing but in the room and only three days once I go out, it just refreshes this brain, too, and even in the crowded place I was still thinking about how the end of the novel I was working on.

I'm always curious and can't wait to end page after page, title after title to finish. I kind of hunted down the number page every time I looked at the bottom right corner. As if this is my reference to continue to excel.

Today I can write ten pages, tomorrow I have to increase the number of pages, at least one or two pages. If saturated, I try to entertain myself chat with Vega or friends on social networks. Or hear Vega's story unfold who she really is.

Likewise, in making a film scenario, from the team of producers I was able to complete it three days, this is an achievement for me.

“Mas, scenario is done.”

“Waduh crazya beneer! The spirit of this author is also, hopefully it does not melt

later.”

“Oooh, insyallah no mas.”

“Good then. Try sent to my email well?” “Siaaaaaap.”

Immediately after the by phone conversation ended, I immediately sent the triller scenario that I had completed, and just waited for what kind of reaction from the production team and producer.

Maybe a few hours after reading it, Febri directly contacted me and commented on what I sent. Exactly, less than an hour he has given a positive response and praise from him is too excessive, or maybe just entertaining.

“Good Jobmas broo, according to what I ordered. And few novel writers can make a perfect scenario like this, if according to the glasses of production! Or maybe the mas has never made a scenario yah?”

“Waah, I myself have never made a scenario, ever read but little and do not understand the meaning. Very much by writing a novel or other book mas.”.I try to balance his words.

Since that assignment, I've become familiar with terms like Disolve to, cut to, Long Shoot (LS ), VO, Estabilizing and so on. It turns out that nothing is difficult if we want to learn, there are only a few obstacles when we have to reread the novel script that is 300 pages thick and make scenes per scene later.

For the umpteenth time, Febry Valentino called me, on the second day after my assignment.

“Mas, tomorrow can go to Bandung?!”

“For what?!”I was hoping to worry.

“Scenario discussion, hunting and teler creation.”

 “Yang really mas?!!”

“Yes God my time is lying! Do not forget to prepare supplies and what should be completed in Jakarta, please send the account number?!”

“Yaudah all water accounts, same phone tivi cable accounts. Hahahaha.” Candanya VIA phone.

“But to be honest, I don't have a bank account number. I usually use my sister's account.”

“Yowis, SMS-in number huh?”

I forwarded my sister's account number which I intentionally saved in the draft phone and I sent it to her mobile number. And soon, Febri called me because he was the one I knew from the beginning.

“Maaas, please check the ATM. Hopefully enough for family snacks and fares to Bandung.”

“Jadzakumullah yes mas.”

 “Sama-sama.”

After I continued the new title Upload Dream, after that I immediately made sure my fare went to Bandung and left the family, especially mamah for a while until my task was completed, and hopefully this will be the beginning of a career that I can be proud of for the nation and my grandchildren.

The material for me is rewarded and entered in the order of the umpteenth, the most important thing is to try and produce quality works, not just simply expecting to get the application of the results of our hard work.

Like what is now in my eyes, again the material is not above

everything, popularity there must be a period of grace, but how the birth of us into people who are remembered for their goodness has a positive impact on a civilization.

My gratitude for the grace that God has given me, slowly began to be seen in front there is a new ray of hope for souls that God has prepared both mentally, ability tested, and the spirit of hope, not solely obtained from the results of simsalabim or inheritance that never broke from our parents. Don't look at a Bob Sadino now, but look at him five Forty-Six Years ago (1967) he was a daily porters, too, and it was Bob Sadino who became the pioneer of the entry of eggs and chickens into Indonesia.

My result today, is as a redeemer of tears, sweat and depleted energy in the written world, which I have been working on since sixth grade Elementary, without the slightest bit of genetic inheritance passed down from my composure.

Being a writer, my life choices that I have avoided are getting closer until I finally resigned, that I am called to be a writer. Now I'm going to dream it, step by step this ladder I'm going up.

And I also should not be satisfied to continue to think how my works are not mumpung aji, after which the works are born that are not balanced with the previous work, even less desirable.

It has become a syndrome in itself, for writers who boom in the first script, after that the next script is just flat, the capital relies on big names, his work is immersed and even plummeted in the market. Well, this is what I should avoid because maintaining what has been achieved is as heavy as gaining the trust of publishers at the beginning when we have got what we achieved, until finally able to be accepted by the reader.

 Because, it is a challenge that people prefer to buy rice than to spend time just reading the thickness of a novel. And it's not easy to break through Leble Best Seller pinning a ribbon on the book cover.

Right now I am nobody, it will be time that will shape me to become who I am. Bismillah, the gate for me to be a productive human being was opened, when countless works of art by matter now received a great appreciation, the money given by Febry was not a sign that this was the end of life. There are still many tasks to be completed, and there are still dreams to be achieved.

I didn't expect the money Febry gave me to be more than enough and this is the biggest balance written in my sister's savings book account, because the financial transactions are limited to receiving a salary every month, after that the ATM card is only a complement in the wallet only. And this is the first time seeing a digit balance that is enough to make it a little problem to calculate the number of zeros lined up like soldiers lined up straight.

“Alhamdulillah, is Febry wrong to transfer this much money?!” I asked to remove the doubt.

After I confirmed it with him, and made sure the amount I received was correct so much.

“Oooh, not wrong! Consider it DP money and your fare to Bandung.”

“This is serious mas?!”

“Seriuslaah, yes time leaves can enter the ATM machine. Do not forget to finish first what is a burden on your mind in Jakarta. So, in Bandung mas Haidar must concentrate with the team to work as much as possible without having to think about the state of the family in Jakarta.”

“Jadzakumullah Khairan Katsir.”

“Have it, don't overdo it?”

“Not excessive really, this is what I am mas.”

“OK

deh. I further make an estimate of production budget ya mas?”

“Siaaap maas, dilanjuuut..”

“Assalamu’alikum.”

“Wa’alikum salam.”

Relieved, if you have confirmed that the money I received was indeed a number of what is listed on the monitor display machine Ajungan Tunai Mandiri. Some of it I take and the rest let it be kept in the account for the needs of the family for the next month.

Some problems related to the money I solve one by one, starting from the installment of money for my wedding reception that only tells the debt for a few years and now I pay for the next three months. After I came back from the bank, my mother was surprised to see me who did not usually buy so many groceries, and indeed in my family did not know the term monthly shopping, rice we buy a liter of rice per day, and even we buy a liter of rice per day, egg or instant noodles only.

“Astaghfirullah’aladzim, where's your money from Haidar? Shopping this much?!” “Signalah kosher mah, and do not worry this is not the result of winning gambling or corruption.”

“So much stuff from where?!! Mom doesn't want, if anything happens later ya naaak?!!”

“Mamah don't be so assumed, this is all Haidar can from down payment for the movie. In a few months I stayed in Bandung until I finished all the work.”

“Alhamdulilllaaaaahirabbil’alamiiiiin, son of mamah success now and may the salvation, blessing and favor of God be poured out for you naaak....Congratulations yaaah?!..”

“Thank you maah, may Allah bestow healthy and long life favors for mamah also”

I saw the face of the woman who had just pinned the divorce to death in her ID card status, seemed radiant to hear this good news. I began to say goodbye to my relatives and hope for their prayers, some neighbors who know my profession and only my closest friends.

A step I walk from home so hard to be away with them, I will miss the 3 nieces and nephews who are the cure for tired when this desire is great to have the baby, my genetic heir later, he said, the dream was dashed when Amel chose to marry a second time with Luwis who died at the hands of Junaidi Abdillah, aka Abu Fadl.

For me to forgive is better, than to hold a grudge, if we believe in God's way of counting, then this heart will be more legowo. Revenge is not the right way to solve problems, it will drag us into the valley of anxiety that is very painful. It will be time to punish those who have wronged us, believe it! Ok, if not in the world it might be even more sadistic in the afterlife.

Amel is my past, which I refuse to reopen his story, because there is a future sheet that I still have to finish and do not know will stop on the last page and the ending of the story that I wrote in this life script.

 “Welcome to my future, good-bye to my past and someday I will reopen, not to get caught up in his nostalgia but just to be remembered and used as a lesson.” I close this title as the past, in the next sheet is my future which I will still write, because I myself look forward to the end of this story will be what it will be, what it will be,