Being the Antagonist's Beloved Sister

metamorphosis of the butterfly

"take care if you have a pipe.I'm so bad right now" in my old life if I felt this way I would smoke because the nicotine in the cigarette substances I smoked made me calm even though it was only a few moments before I had to anesthetize myself before I experienced stress, stress is a very common thing that usually happens once a month or once a week until I have to go to a psychiatrist because I was diagnosed with mental disorders such as depression and personality disorders, but strangely after I was moved I did not experience such an event too much again to this day although I can still act like a normal human with my circumstances like it is quite strange like it exists something Tampa lost I realized.

"i don't have it but I recommend not using it too often, if your feelings are really bad you can do something else that is more beneficial to you to your own detriment, judging from your reaction you're like you have a mental illness" hearing his words I was silent for a long time by looking at him and looking up at the sky as if nothing would happen because he seemed very good at observing.

"you look too normal for someone who has such a disease but that doesn't rule out the possibility that you have it"

"oh, really? I don't care about that"

I lay facing the sky up through the top of the building I felt very stinging with the stars I felt I was too childish to say it but that's how I feel right now.

"boyfriend, I can't believe you were the one who had the aura of an adult the first time I saw you"

"i know that even if you say that, sometimes being a little childish is not a bad thing at all"

"hahaha, it's true that the mouth of a good liar is who you think I am until you take me for granted, you're basically a kid pretending to be a grown-up you realize the first time I saw you walking down the street in the corridor you were like a lost, frustrated child trying to stay strong even pretending nothing happened"

"that's how bad I am in your eyes"

"i don't call it bad and I don't say it's a word that has good intentions, I just say what I want to say" after that she lay down next to me looking at me for a while and then closed her eyes with her hands that became the pads of her head.

"you know someone like you is the most powerful person I've ever met, you can still survive and live until now I don't know what you're going through but if I go through what you're going through I won't last as long as you do, do you know I like butterflies because of what they went through before becoming a very beautiful butterfly"

"and I love how they can fly with their heavy wings on their backs" I automatically caught them.

"like you, exactly, the two things have something in common and a lot of meaning in a butterfly's metamorphosis"

"i'm guessing you have a job in art or literature"

"are you just guessing?"

"no, because you look like someone I know in some ways and that person is a writer"

"anywhere…"

"he's the most chatty person I've ever met, though, then he was also someone who hated himself the most and he was also someone who always wanted to run from whatever he had to go through even though he wanted to run but in the end he always finished it by saying 'I will not be able to run because there is a wall that always menhan me then I also can not keep silent in the same place for a long time and the more time I spend then the more difficult something I have to get through then I will finish it now' those are the words he always said, he said, many people think he's perfect when in reality he's like a pudding that can be easily destroyed, that's my impression of him"

"you seemed excited to tell me about her which signified that she meant so much to you" I sat staring at her at a glance that was closing my eyes somehow I felt my feelings were starting to improve.

"whether you realize it, it's very rare that someone is aware of my actions"

"well, maybe it's just a coincidence that I said that and that word doesn't go to you"

"i wanted to ask you about what you've been through all this time but.I know you don't want to remember it I won't ask you in exchange you can tell me one story for me"

"I don't need to tell you anything for me because there are so many stories in your brain and if you're not getting inspiration for your work then I'm just saying you should just shut up or do whatever you like"

"is he like that"

"he was like that but very rarely did he do it because he had a purpose that made him never run out of inspiration for his work"

"purpose?!"

"purpose is the main ingredient to make it produce works that are very liked by others and I also do not know what purpose makes it so hard to try but all I know is that he so very happy just by imagining it that he also has someone he wants to dedicate his work to just him, although I heard that person always did not read what he wrote but he always tried to get that person to read it "

"do I also have to have someone I want to dedicate"

"no, that's not what I meant by that"

"then can you say it if you don't want to say it from the beginning you shouldn't say it"

"i just want you to realize it yourself because what needs it is you're not me"

"why should I realize it myself wouldn't it be easy if you said it"

"it would only be different if you felt it yourself instead of my word then it was not an easy thing to say through a word if I said it it would just be a tampa artI letter and just the remaining meaning"

"i can understand the meaning if you say it"

"you're like a child and it fits your best" I quickly woke up and left her sitting still, I just smiled faintly for her and then disappeared.

although I left him with the curiosity that was on him but it was the best of the kind that he had to find the answer to his own question because Ian had said something to me " something that you really want and you get later with your efforts, it will work for you even if not forever"