Angan Love

Refraining

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The silence was felt after Amel left Rachel's treatment room.

Ravin and Rachel were both silent.

Not a word came out of the mouths of the two of them.

As Rachel struggled with her own thoughts, Ravin approached.

Sitting on the chair beside her bed, made Rachel slightly jump.

Their eyes met each other for a moment before awkwardness again enveloped.

"Rav .. "

"Chel .. "

Say both at the same time.

Both seem wrong.

"Elo first" said Ravin.

She let Rachel say what she wanted to say.

Surely Rachel wanted to say something about her love statement in the park earlier.

Could it be that the girl would refuse or accept her declaration of love?

Ravin became nervous.

"Emc .. I .. emm .. about that.. "

"Chel .. " interrupted Ravin when Rachel had not yet finished her speech.

Seeing Rachel who hesitated to say something, made Ravin feel that the girl must be uncomfortable.

"Gue is sorry about my statement.

Honestly, I don't mean to make you feel burdened"

"Eh?"

"On my love statement is the same lo.

I say it's the same because I want to be honest about how I feel.

Elo do not need to answer if you feel uncomfortable, the most important thing is to know about my feelings" said Ravin.

Rachel shook her head, confused.

"It's not Rav. Don't misunderstand me" Rachel said.

"I'm honestly surprised, but I don't feel overwhelmed.

I just feel myself not pantes aja, elo a good guy Rav"

"Elo is also a good woman, Chel"

Rachel shook her head.

"Rav .. elo know my own image in all this time.

Elo and I's lives are inversely 180 degrees. You're good men, your family is good, your friends and your surroundings are all good.

While me?

My life is all just about the same bad thing.

Our first meeting even started from a commotion in my life" said Rachel.

"There's nothing that makes me worthy of receiving such a good feeling from you"

Rachel had been living haphazardly, for her there was nothing meaningful in her life.

No one wanted her presence all this time,

even his parents.

Now someone wants it, thinks it means something.

And

the man was not an indiscriminate man, a man whom even many women adored.

Not like the men who have been chasing him often just out of curiosity.

Rachel really felt inappropriate if she had to be with Ravin.

"What on that basis do you think that you don't deserve me?" ask Ravin not to believe it.

Rachel tries to rebuff in her heart if she also likes Ravin.

That his heart was also pounding because of that man.

"Yes . I don't think I'm a good fit. All around you there are so many women who are better for you, good women like Nara.

Elo same she could be a matching couple, not my rich girl"

"Why bring Nara, Chel.

I'm the same Nara's best friend, Chel. We can't possibly"

"But he's the one who deserves you, not my rich"

"Elo is also fast, Chel"

"Not Rav"

"Want Chel. And the feeling I'm saying is, the feeling I just want elo"

"No, Rav. What would others say if we were together"

"Jaid is what you think?

Can't you accept me for that?

I don't care about other people, Rachel" said Ravin annoyed.

"You know whatever the reason is not important" said Rachel.

Ravin rubbed his face rough with both palms. Frustrating!

Why would he argue with a girl he likes.

"That's important to me, Chel"

"You don't reject me because you don't like me, maybe I can accept.

But if you refuse me just because you care about people, I will not be able to accept"

Ravin uttered in a stern tone, he would convince the heart of his girl.

Her girl?

Rachel hasn't said yes.

Rachel silenced, statement after statement sincerely Ravin managed to break his heart.

"Did you really like me?" ask Ravin seriously.

He looked seriously at Rachel's two agitated eyes.

Rachel was silent and could not answer.

"My answer, Rachel.

If you don't have any feelings for me, then it won't force" said Ravin.

Rachel was still silent, she didn't know what to say.

His heart kept pounding rapidly as if to say that he,

but on the one hand its logic seems to continue to reject that reality.

"Gue .. " said Rachel worried.

"Gue .. I can't" said Rachel slowly.

And

only that word can he put out.

"Well I understand" Ravin replied quickly making Rachel look up at him.

I don't know why Rachel's heart was sad.

Is Ravin disappointed in him?

Is Ravin really going to stop fighting?

"Rav .. " said Ravin

But suddenly Ravin got up from his seat making Rachel's eyes follow the man's movements.

"Mending elo break, I want to go out for a while" said Ravin was about to leave.

Rachel was silent, she knew the man was disappointed.

But he could not do anything, he already said the thing that made Ravin hurt.

Now he could only stare at the back of Ravin who walked away and disappeared behind the door that was closed.

While on the other hand, in front of the door Ravin smiled obliquely upon hearing Rachel's reply.

Not because he was disappointed, but quite the opposite. He's happy.

She now knows Rachel's feelings are the same as hers.

The girl liked it too.

"My question isn't about you being able to accept me or not Chel,

but about whether you have the same feelings or not the same me.

And elo's answer wasn't the right answer.

Now I know that elo has the same rich feeling as me" Ravin murmured with a smile

Determined to convince Rachel, she will make Rachel hers.

"Gue will fight elo, Rachel Irish Zelena" Ravin said in earnest.

********

Rachel's treatment room was quiet all night.

If the nights are usually a warm bedtime chat between Rachel and Ravin, but not last night.

After Ravin went back into Rachel's room the man just kept quiet, not saying a word other than telling Rachel to get some rest.

Similarly, Rachel who was confused and agitated, she did not know what to say or do.

He realized the rejection he did to Ravin would definitely have an effect like this.

The two of them will no longer be as they were before.

Rachel should be happy if Ravin inhabits her and may soon stay away from her.

Because that's what he wanted.

But, uh,

not happy, but instead, he felt sad.

Does Rachel really want Ravin to stay away from her?

His heart throbbed at the thought of that.

"Are you ready?"

Ravin's voice managed to jolt Rachel from her daydream.

Rachel nodded her head while looking at all her belongings that Ravin had neatly packed in one bag.

"Udah" Rachel replied as she approached Ravin.

She has changed her casual clothes, today Rachel has been allowed to go home by a doctor.

His external wounds had healed, his body condition had also stabilized.

Only, Rachel had to have a consultation with a psychiatrist once a week to heal her trauma.

"Let me" said Ravin as Rachel was carrying her bag.

"It's okay, I can take it myself" said Rachel still grabbed the tote bag into her hand.

"I told you I was"

Ravin snatches the bag from Rachel's hand, making the girl give in.

Ravin was still kind and attentive to her, even though the man's tone sounded cold and different from usual.

"Come ." said Ravin when all the goods are ready to be brought.

Rachel nodded her head, then followed Ravin who walked first out of the room.

They entered an elevator, headed for the lobby.

In the elevator there was no conversation between the two.

Everything feels quiet.

Arriving in the lobby, Ravin is often greeted by friendly hospital officials who cross paths with him.

Ravin also returned their greetings with the same friendliness.

Rachel can see Ravin really has a very humble and not arrogant nature from the way he treats hospital employees.

And

it makes Rachel feel that she is not worthy of Ravin.

The man is too perfect of everything.

"Where are you going home? Amel's apartment or home?" ask Ravin when they're in the car.

"Amel's apartment" Rachel answered while putting on her seatbelt.

There was no answer from Ravin, the man just nodded his head while turning on the car engine and drove his car to Amel's apartment.

During the trip there was no chatter between the two, Rachel just kept quiet because Ravin did not make any sound.

His heart felt uneasy Ravin silenced him like this.

Although the tail of his eyes tried to keep glancing towards Ravin who was seriously driving.

While Ravin was actually holding himself back from talking to Rachel.

He wanted Rachel to talk as usual.

There will be a lot of topics that they cover, there will be a lot of things that they ask each other

and what Ravin missed the most was seeing Rachel's laughing face when there was something funny between their chatter.

Not because of anger or childishness Ravin silenced Rachel, but there was a plan behind her attitude like that to Rachel.

Plans to make Rachel miss him and admit that she feels the same way as Ravin.

And for that Ravin held back temporarily.

"Gue miss your smile, Chel" Inner Ravin.

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Successfully failed Ravin 😁 plan

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