About Raga
A Family
Naya entered her house slowly, her eyes immediately fixed on Rena-bundanya who was crying on the sofa. Naya immediately hugged her mother worriedly.
"Bund, why? Mother how to cry? Naya does not like to see the rich nangis gini. Wh why? The story is the same Naya," Naya said in an anxious tone.
"Mother gapapa, son. Just glimpsing his eyes. How did ospek's second day go?" asked Rena while gently rubbing her daughter's cheek.
"Bund, don't lie. Naya knows that mom is not okay anymore. Mother if why-why do not be harbored alone, Naya also want to always be there when the mother again sad."
Rena felt overwhelmed by the attention of her daughter and could not stem her cries anymore. Naya is right, if she can't keep this matter alone.
"Dad," said Rena hanging
"Why? What father is mother?" Ask Naya again, she knows that something must have happened by now.
"Dad cheated again." Now that Rena can only cry in front of her daughter, she feels like a failed woman because she can't take care of her family.
"Again?" Naya could only be subdued limply while holding back the emotions she was feeling at the moment.
While Rena just nodded while hugging her daughter tightly. Naya let go of her mother's embrace slowly, she looked at this woman in front of her with a hearty look. Why else would he have to hear this? He hated being in a position like this.
"Bund, why the hell is mom still hoping for a rich guy dad? Mother why still survive with men who deliberately hurt the mother's heart? Enough bund, Naya has already cape. We can't make someone change if he doesn't want to change, Bund." Naya spoke while holding back her tears.
"Mother this lacquer is for you, for your sister as well. Mother doesn't want you to live without a father figure."
"Naya asked the mother, have you ever thought about our feelings? Naya had never known what it was like to have a father figure when the father was near Naya." crying Naya can not be dammed anymore, the defense collapsed if it has been discussed about the house.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry you made you feel so rich, son. Mother has failed to take care of our family for the second time."
"Bund, don't habitually blame yourself. Naya doesn't like it, mama's not wrong. Aja father who never felt enough to have a woman as strong as mother who nemenin him from zero. Bund, don't be forced again. Naya will take care of Hana the same mother if you split with father." Naya wiped away her tears slowly.
"Dear, mother can't. Yes, don't worry mom. Just think about your school, don't tell me it's the same Hana. He's a pity for you."
"Bund .... "
"Promise the mother, mother also promise Naya if one day Dad must change."
Naya could not force her mother, although Naya was fed up with everything she could only nod her head. Why at a time like this is only Hana who cares. Naya is upset, she's really upset. But he understood his mother's condition was not okay. What happens if Naya spills her frustration now?
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For Naya to be silent one roof but never a life it is no longer a home. It looks whole but actually falls apart. Indeed he did not live with flaws, even his parents could buy anything for him. But, the warmth of the house in general he never got.
Naya wants to be able to talk at length, wants to be asked how she is doing? He also wants to be asked if he is okay or not? He wants attention, he wants a hug. But it seems like no one understands that.
Even when Naya was depressed to see her father's affair when she was in elementary school, no one seemed to know, not even her own parents. Naya just kept it all alone. Until now when the mother wanted to improve the relationship, for Naya it was too late and really too late.
Slowly Naya picked up a book with a cover titled Healing. The place where he revealed what he felt. Naya is very difficult to express her feelings, she prefers to write them down on a piece of paper.
...--------------------...
The first love of a girl is her father.
To this day, I never knew what it was like. Even staying at one table is awkward. Unlike Hana, she loves dad so much and vice versa.
Sometimes it hurts to see Hana get that close to you. Not infrequently I try to do it, but I can't. Too foreign. Added to what dad did to mom. It makes the distance even more distant.
Really, I hate you. Why can't I get the father figure I want?
...Nayara Tirtania Wilaga...
...--------------------...
Naya again closed her book, at least she was relieved to have revealed her heart. After being satisfied to look at the contents of the night sky, Naya re-entered her room to grab a hoodie and went straight down the stairs, she had to go to the minimarket to buy some snacks. Tomorrow the ospek agenda is a leisurely walk, so all students are encouraged to bring heavy or light meals.
"Where are you going, brother?" ask Hana.
"Minimarket, why?" ask Naya back.
"Brown two yes," he asked, raising his eyebrows.
Naya reached out her hand hinting to give the money to her sister.
"That money you used to cake, I'll change."
"Here change your eyes six, most forget," said Naya as she opened the door.
He was going to use a car or a motorcycle, but it seems like the night streets are not bad. After all, the place is not too far from Naya housing. After all Naya likes to enjoy the night air, because it can make her calm.
Naya stared at the surroundings, there were still many people walking around. His eyes were staring at the small family who were now holding hands. The little boy, about 5 years old, seemed happy even though he was just walking with his parents.
Naya became a little envious, she had never felt like that before. But he realized something, if his grandfather used to hold him at night when their car broke down in front of the main gate of housing far enough.
"So miss Grandpa, I only have memories of grandfather. The birth time of the adzzanine grandfather, the fat me first time grandfather, who is always there every time I wake up grandfather, what contribution Dad in my life besides love pocket money?" Naya chuckles. Indeed, sometimes we need to laugh at our own lives, so as to know how bad our lives are in a family.
