The Smile of Longs in Prayer

chapter 10

pov Ana's

"assalamualaikum Mas"

" greetings waalaikum, you haven't slept" Adrian asked

" no, soon as possible"

" i'll be home in 2 days, if there's anything you want to order" Adrian asked

Degs...

suddenly I was stunned to hear Adrian's unusual question.

"Ana" call Adrian

"i-iya, there's no need for anything Mas, thank you"

" are you healthy? you all right?"

ask Adrian back

any more...

my heart was like running a marathon getting attention, but soon I pushed away because Adrian would only hurt me later after I was flattered then he would drop as usual instead.

" Thank God, I'm fine"

" are you still at Oma's?"

" no Mas, yesterday was only 2 days "

" ohh "sis Adrian

" don't want to tell me anything? " ask Adrian

Deg,, again, what's with her, not as usual, is this a form of guilt because she died right me and left with her affair???

I started to monologue myself

" eumm no Mas "

" keep yourself "

that's all I can say, honestly my heart aches when I imagine my husband being with another woman.

" Keep your heart, wait for Mas to come home "

said Adrian who managed to make me gawk, is he kambet? or did he hit the plane door? oh god what's wrong with me? do not present the taste again Rabb if it will eventually be broken to pieces.

" An altafunnisa, Assalamualaikum, rest is late ".

" well, Mas"

after almost a week finally Husband who does not think I there contact me, strange son of magic, his words also like strange.I do not take a headache, I do not bother, after putting the phone on the nightstand I passed to the bathroom for ablution and prayer isya.

the atmosphere of silence and the rain did not and Merta made me sleep, all the conversations with Adrian mas revolved in my head, what was he doing there, with whom??? it's always this thing that keeps my wounds from bleeding but is able to tear the taste that I've been planting for a long time.

*****

at three o'clock in the morning I woke up, had my routine activities with him begging for forgiveness and asking for patience and flexibility in accepting and living uncertain life twists and turns.

"my Lord, forgive me if my love for your servant is overstepped.

lord, forgive me if my love keeps me away from you.

lord, do not make me far from you, because I admire your creatures too much.

lord, do not turn away from me because of my iniquity and my lust.

lead me on the path that you have led, bless our household with the best of your pleasure, Rabb.

give clarity and bright spots in the sacred bond, Lord, only to you I complain, only to you I wish, Lord."

there was a sense of relief after complaining of all the heartbreak, at a time like this, I remembered the advice of my mother, even though I was a child and had just attended Elementary School, but all the teachings and what you taught me are still able to live until now, thank you mom, thank you for all your love.

clear melts on the cheeks I can't stand anymore, the longing for parents and the sadness of being a wife that is not considered as if making my life meaningless. I am like a kite that is cut off in the clouds without clarity and without decision.all I have to do, all I have to live.

" BI Ijah, cook what bi" I greet Bi Ijah who is already busy in the kitchen after shajah prayer.

" this is non, aunt again for breakfast " replied BI Ijah briefly while smiling at me.

" later in the afternoon, auntie don't cook, let Ana buy it"

I said to BI Ijah because seeing the hijah bi seems unhealthy, his forehead on the patch indicates that he is not healthy.

" it's okay non, at home there are still many supplies "

" don't have to cook Bi, let Ana buy it, it's okay bi, especially not at home Adrian mas also"

" but the Asep and mas security guard there anyway" said BI Ijah did not want to lose.

" it's very easy, for today's aunt rest, okay" I said while raising my two thumbs.

" well non "

after breakfast fried rice made by BI Ijah, I rushed to get ready to go to campus immediately.

after descending the Asep mang I stepped into the campus gate and accidentally collided with Udin.

gedubraaaaa

all my innate books scattered, for a moment I was a little dazed to get a hard hit accidentally.

" I'm sorry Ana, sorry I accidentally "

said Udin

after that I just realized it was the man I hit was Udin.

" it's okay, I was in a hurry" I said to him.

Udin picked up all the scattered books, and I accidentally saw something strange.

" This Udin is yours?"

Udin seemed to be flirting with my question.

" i-it's "

this ring is exactly like Adrian's mas, our wedding ring.

" is this yours?" I made sure to go back.

" i-iya that's my wedding ring" Adrian answered lowered his head

and then I paired it with my ring, just like how come it happened like this?

" ooh "

then I returned the ring with a different feeling, didn't Oma ever tell me that it was specially reserved for our wedding?

aaaah sultan mah everywhere, it could be much the same taste right.

after retrieving the book I immediately walked past Udin, and headed straight for the library.

after entering the library I was like seeing a stranger across the bookshelf who I was also going to go there to put back the books I borrowed, but a little strange, too, when I rebuked, he ignored me.

after putting the book I finally went back to the table to read, there was still about 30 minutes before the lecturer came in, and it was enough for me to just read rather than have to sit in the room and stupefied.

nothing special, I chose to read a book of psychological knowledge, somehow I felt interested, and after reading the contents of the interest became more interesting, more interesting, without wasting time I was swept away in how to know our interlocutor who is hiding something, or the interlocutor who is lying, even explained in detail, how to look at his face and posture will be like what.

then I continue reading part of the facial expression, or more clearly how to read the face and what is in the mind of the interlocutor. honestly I can not believe 100% because the depth of the sea can still be measured, but the depth of the heart of only that person and my Lord knows.

after I guess enough I finally put the book back on the library shelf, and then

bruuu...

my eyes are blackened, and everything is dark

seriate....