The Muazin

Episodes 10

At that time, I was only about 4 years old. I will scold Mas Ali when he makes me cry. Wherever Mas Ali goes, I'll go with him. It makes it troublesome because it has to take care of and carry me if I cry.

Mother told Mas Ali to take me to teach at the place of Mr. Muhsin–, a teacher who was the only one in the village at the time. We were both escorted by the father using a motorbike, because the distance is quite far if it must be taken by foot for children the age of Mas Ali and me. Likewise, when you go home, you will return to pick up at Mr. Muhsin's house.

At the age of just 4 years, I just know the letters alif and ba only. I just accompany Mas Ali to teach and listen to the reading of the children who teach there. Iqra's book also did not forget to be prepared by my mother in the bag that I brought, even though it was only for luggage because I did not want to teach at that time. Of course, this self is not just silent waiting for my brother to finish teaching. I played with the other kids who were there. 

Joy for the sake of cheerfulness we create by ourselves. Until finally, there was a boy the age of Mas Ali carrying a creepy doll. How not creepy? The doll had stumped hands, no hair, and only one eye. It was so horrible that I always tried to avoid the boy.

I approached Mas Ali who was teaching to take cover behind his back. Somehow the story goes, the boy seemed to know that I was afraid of the doll he was carrying. He approached me and thrust his creepy doll in this face. I dodged and closed my eyes. I did not dare to cry even though I wanted to do it, because I was afraid of the people who were there, let alone Mr. Muhsin who seemed very fierce.

From that moment on, I was always bullied by him. Exile for the sake of evil he did to me. Up to the peak, he was carrying a chicken to scare me. I screamed in fear and cried loudly. Mas Ali tried to calm himself down, but it never worked. Finally, he took me home on foot.

Since then, I have been teaching again. Various seductions and persuasions were intended so that I would teach at Mr. Muhsin's place again, but, still, I did not want to. Finally, it was the father who taught me to finish the volume 6, then not long after, near the house there were those who set up tahfid house, and I chose to teach there.

***

Slowly, this brain began to remember everything about my childhood that was afraid of Gus Fawaid. Mas Ali has told everything clearly, the memory pieces have been arranged by themselves. In fact, I used to try to forget that scary event. But, it turns out that right now, I myself want to reveal it.

I never thought that the person I was currently idolizing was the same person I was afraid of. The physical changes of Gus Fawaid are so prominent. In the past, he was fat and white, his face also looks very scary for children his age at that time. But now he has changed. His skin remained white, but not as white as it used to be. And he is also an ideal body, in accordance with his height. His face was so sharp, it was fitting that I didn't recognize him.

"He was also nanyain you, Nduk," said Mas Ali after telling a story. That "Nduk" call was for me that he gave me since childhood.

I was surprised to hear her words just now.

"Then anyway? What's nanyain?"

"Say gini, how Zaya does not know me, yes, Al. Does he hate me, same as me? That way. Laughing is not clear."

"Yes, I don't know, people are changing." I answer what it is.

"Yaudah, from now on, if you meet Fawaid to be familiar dong! Poor him, have tried to be friendly with you."

"Lha wong she told her own story."

Tonight, I finally figured out a puzzle that had not been answered. That is, about Gus Fawaid being different to me, he who is always friendly and smiles at me that there is a reason. Apparently, he had known himself since childhood. 

But why is he trying to make me recognize him? Even though he has known me since childhood, but he should also behave the same with others. Why am I the only one distinguished? Various questions about him, continue to rain down on this brain.

I don't know, I can get dizzy if I have to think about it continuously. Most importantly, I have found the answer to my question. This heart is very happy when it knows that Gus Fawaid–sang muazin idol of all those people, even already knew about me.

And I'm happy, too, because in a few days it will be Ramadan. That means, some of my time will be spent in the mosque, and hopefully I can often see him and hear every chant of his prayer that is so beautiful. 

***

When I got to school, I told Safa about Gus Fawaid. He looked surprised to learn that Gus Fawaid and I had known each other since childhood. 

"Kok you really don't want to, Za? Time must be told first" asked Safa.

"Yes, because I tried to forget everything that happened back then. I'm so scared to know. Because of him, until now I'm afraid of baby dolls and chickens."

Safa laughed loudly when she heard my answer. Indeed, until now, it traumatized me to dolls and chickens. 

"But now I'm in love. Aye, right?"

"Enak. I just fell in love, yeah. Boro-boro she wants to be like me."

"Yes too, yeah. How could Gus Fawaid want to be like this silly of you. Haha."

I can't tell the difference between feeling love and just idolizing someone. I also don't know if I just like the beautiful voice of Gus Fawaid, or if there is actually another feeling in this heart.

Safa's words, success made me think back. Have I fallen in love?