The Beginning of a Famous Writer

Scratches of the Past

"You?" I said rudely, slamming the door and leaving him who was still standing.

He is one of my brothers. The person I have not been able to accept so far. I know that it is him, because I have often seen his photo that is milling around in my hand, although I can not accept it, but on social media we are friends. We don't seem to know each other. Never interacted with each other this whole time.

And also another brother said, that our faces are almost similar.

"Who?" Ask my brother

I who ran from the door immediately headed for the room, with no intention of answering my brother's question.

Surprised by my behavior, he went to the door.

How shocked my brother was too.

He was shocked not because he had first met his brother, but my brother was shocked because he thought he had come at the wrong time.

All this time the relationship between my sister and my brother was good enough, only I was still shrouded in past resentment.

They even visit each other, to establish silahturahmi during the celebration of a certain day.

My brother who takes care of my mother. She fears the presence of her stepson is sending her mother back to her past.

"Sin...?" Said my brother as if not peracaya that the woman who carried a toddler in front of him was one of the children of his late father, namely his sister as well.

"Why come without telling? Was it a week ago from here?" Say my brother again.

"I heard that big brother from the village came here, I really wanted to meet him," he said firmly.

"But this isn't exactly Dinda. There's a brother here, brother doesn't want him to remember his past with you here, understand!" Pinta.

My brother intends for Dinda to understand the current situation, he hopes that Dinda will return to his house, without having to meet me or mother.

But suddenly my mother came.

"Who son? Why not get in?" Said ibuk and he was already in the back position brother.

Looking at the mother who appeared behind her brother, Dinda immediately grabbed my mother's hand, and immediately shook hands.

"I am the son of the father, I am the brother of the brother and also the brother of Indri." Said loudly.

Instantly, my brother panicked, my mother was surprised, he seemed to not believe, his happiness that some days was damaged by the presence of people in his past.

"I came here to meet Mr. Indri, and to repair a relationship that has long been shrouded in hatred" he said, hoping to be accepted by his mother.

Shaking his hand, "Please enter." Ibuk.

Because it is impossible to throw him out. His instincts as a mother acted, he widened his selfishness, and went in intending to catch up with me to the room, as if he had an answer to my strange behavior, who passed into the room and locked himself in the room.

While I locked myself in my room, my husband did not stop knocking at the door, mother and husband also seemed to be racing to knock on the door so I could open it.

Knock for a knock I didn't mind.

The call I never answered let alone intend to open the door.

Husband calls me, I'll rijeck soon. And immediately send chatt through the green application.

[Give me time to be alone, and please take care of the child, until I'm ready I'll come out by myself]

Message I sent.

And the husband seemed to be reading soon, looking blue already.

[Ok, calm your mind, pray and pray, ask for help, as good a helper is Allah SWT,]

Husband reply at the end of his speech, do not forget he was affixed emoticons spirit and pray, only I read, no longer reply.

I was crying so it happened. I'm angry at this self. I even blame why this feeling is so hateful. But he doesn't know what at all.

With the rest of my cries, I went to the bathroom intending to abudhu and perform the magrib prayer, he said,

After the prayer I did not forget to pray, pray for this heart to receive it, pray that this grudge be destroyed instantly.

Back I cried as it happened, as a silent witness complained my heart.

Done spilling everything. I picked up a paper and a pen.

*Past Scores*

The sound of crickets on a dark night seems to be the music of the time dancing in the mind

Formerly.dozens of years passed as if still painted in mind.

The fine scratches are still imprinting

The crying...

Tear...

It's like two lovebirds who always play with the mind

Bathin and the raging mind think of fine scratches without ink

The Soul... Why are those fine scratches still imprinting???

I try to stifle the heart...

Sculpting the love that once wore

Still, I hate..

If only everything could be replayed

I wouldn't let it...

Hate and emotion

Become a winner of heart..

I cannot deny, I am also tormented by this hatred.

I lay down while hugging the scratches of my past. Without intending, I fell asleep with the remaining tears on my cheeks.

***

A gentle touch on the shoulder, made me instantly intend to open my eyes. Curious about who gives the touch with a soft touch, a touch that so reconciles the heart. While I remember once that I still locked myself in this room. I tried to open my eyes slowly, to find out the touch that so reconcile the heart. The eyes felt very sore, probably caused by the tears I had shed earlier.

But still I forced it open, because touch as if it would force me to open my eyes. As soon as my eyes opened, I faintly saw a smile from a face that was not so foreign from my vision.

Without saying a word. I tried to gather all the memories, stabilizing the soul shake from the trouble that had just occurred.

The bead of his eyes seemed to look at me deeply, to the heart that was not okay. His facial language describes the question of what is happening to me.

Instantly he smiled, and embraced this body into his arms, hugged me while rubbing the tops of the heads.

"I'm sorry, son!" heed

She still hugged me tightly as her body trembled describing that she was now crying.

"Mr?" Ogre me.

As soon as I remembered, the smile I had missed, the smile that often graced my cheeks.

I was silent and fixated, not even intending to return his embrace. I was still overcome by the anger of hatred for the parting I had been through all this time.

As if I understood what I was feeling.

He immediately broke down the embrace, gently touching both sides of this shoulder, directing the gaze, until we looked up.

The black bead of his eyes seemed to signal, as if transferring a thousand powers, wishing I could get through this.

"Son, your brother is not wrong, he does not know what.and so do you, even if there is someone to be guilty here, the person is Father. The Father who has made your heart hateful, the Father who has made you full of disappointment, because the Father who is unfaithful to you, the Father who reneges on promises, so as to bring thorns in the flesh between you."

I'm still not flinching.

"Excuse me Father, make up, promise to accept each one, all of you are the hope of the Father, be a child who is sholeh and sholehah, do not make hatred between you torment the Father, so that you can calm down there," he said with an indescribable sobbing.

The tang parsed down, until it touched the fingers, slowly the tip of the fingertips eroded the distance.

A white shadow left a silence, I woke up with tears still wetting my cheeks.

***

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