SUDDEN INDIGO

41. I HATE MY SELF

...I HATE MY SELF...

...(.(.HATING MYSELF)...

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AUREL doesn't know what to do. Tomorrow is Sunday, and unfortunately next week there are no school assignments to be collected. Aurel clucked, not having any busyness just making his mind split.

Chocolate packaging and chips strewn on the floor, Aurel is the culprit. Sometimes the girl will act strange when she has a lot of thoughts. Aurel always vents it on food.

And after the food ran out, the thought again disturbed him.

Had terbesit other ideas in his head to spend his taste by watching Korean dramas. That way his mind that is branching will be slightly reduced. The problem is almost solved but another problem arises. His laptop was in Nakula's room and Aurel was too lazy to pick it up. If there is an elevator in his house may not be a problem, but if you have to go through the stairs? Seems not. Aurel was too lazy to do so.

One breath as a booster of his spirit when taking a standing position leaving the edge of the bed. He looked around, the atmosphere of his room became quieter.

Since his return from school Aurel continues to feel awkwardness. His mind was always on Leana, and strangely he felt so worried.

For the umpteenth time he reached for the phone lying on the nightstand, next to a glass of water. Aurel was hoping for a message from Leana. That way he will feel relieved to know Leana's condition is fine.

Geck... Geck... Tok

In this quiet atmosphere it was easy for Aurel to find a knock on the door from outside his room.

"Yes!" Aurel threw her phone into bed. Taking his steps towards the door, he finally managed to open it and check who it was.

It turns out that his guess was wrong. Not father, mother, and Nakula as depicted in his head while still holding the doorknob. Aurel didn't even think he'd meet that guy.

"Leana," the girl said spontaneously while glaring. No less quickly his hands began to air and ended smothering his mouth. Of course he was surprised. There was no wind, no rain, and suddenly Leana went to her house.

"Lo said.." The sentence wasn't even perfect when the tingle struck as the girl neutralized her anxious feelings through a sip of saliva. Aurel close both sides of his lips then, his eyeballs become more and more rounded following a second that perfects itself into minutes. There was something different from Leana's current look, Aurel didn't even dare to say it. His eyes must have been wrong.

What Aurel expected was apparently the opposite of what his eyes were witnessing. No matter how much his heart refused, the fact was indeed like that. Like it or not, want it or not, he should accept it with a chest of air.

Leana stepped in while Aurel chose to retreat to stretch his position from his best friend, "An, how can you..." Aurel was unable to finish his words. Tears had just fallen from every corner of his eyes.

Leana published a smile so that her pale face was slightly saved.

Quite a long time silence hit the small room, to the point that the sound of crickets outside there sounded so clear. Leana chose to melt her silence. Starting by moving the corners of her lips, Leana finally told a story.

"It's been almost three years since we've been victorious" Leana paused her sentence. The girl was smiling showing her dimples, "Lo remembers, right Rel. When I first started school, I was begging you to be my friend?" coined.

Aurel wiped his tears, "And that day I was honest with you about the advantages I could see ghosts," he replied in a slightly hoarse voice.

"At first I thought you were just kidding me about it, but tonight you can see me. That means you never lie about the advantages you can see other dimensional creatures."

The tears inundated Aurel's chewy cheeks, soaking the base of his nose. Aurel could not accept this reality.

Aurel nodded. In the first second when their eyes met, Aurel could already deduce that. It was easy for Aurel to distinguish between a human figure and an invisible figure. It is unfortunate, the figure of Leana has changed into a spirit.

"Thank you, Rails have been good with me."

Aurel ventured to stare at Leana for longer. Starting from the tip of the head to the tip of his feet that no longer tread the floor. Aurel returns it again, seeing the body of his best friend who is still wrapped in school uniforms. There are some red patches that Aurel believes to be blood all over his best friend's body.

"The school was home in an accident. Someone hit me from behind. I can't clearly remember the incident. Surely when I started to realize my form has become the spirit of Rel." Aurel could feel the sadness that was portrayed through Leana's hoarse voice. It's just that the teardrops will never be seen on the girl's face again. The spirit is different from the human. If likened to a spirit is only a shadow that is only realized by some people.

"Why did you leave me so soon An?" the pajamas worn by Aurel were wet from tears. Aurel realized, he should not give a sentence that only adds to the level of sadness in Leana. But that kind of sentence just came off. Aurel was overwhelmed by her emotions.

"I'm sorry Rel if all this time I'm much wrong lo."

Aurel shook his head not to accept, "No, no An. You don't have to apologize!"

"Gue told Rail, I'm leaving. Take care of yourself!" Like a froth in the ocean, Leana's form disappeared in an instant.

Aurel is back. His position changed from standing to sitting. Never once did he think about how painful it would be to see a friend go to a different dimension.

A ringing made Aurel check his phone. Yohan-the class is on the phone.

"Yes?"

"Rel you have to be strong! I just got word that Leana's dead."

Aurel chose to unilaterally disconnect the phone. So far he has not been able to accept the word 'Death' following the name of his best friend, 'Leana.'

When Aurel wanted to get the phone back to where it was, another call came.

This time from Netta. Despite knowing what to say, Aurel still lifted the phone call from one of his classmates.

"Ril? You're hearing, aren't you?" heboh Netta right after Aurel pressed the green button and then brought his flat object closer to the front of the ear.

"Gue is terrible."

"Lo has to be strong!" it seemed like the girl across there was crying, evident from her slightly hoarse voice. "We all feel like we're losing the Rail. But I'm sure among us you're the one who loses the most."

"Thank you Net!"

And the phone connection was cut off.

The news of Leana's death stirred up the group chatter. The notification sound in a row hit the phone that Aurel had just placed on the nightstand. Aurel doesn't care about her phone at all.

A flash of shadow when Leana was alive hit Aurel's image. It made her cry even more so. The girl clasped her sheets tightly, her head kept shaking, not accepting "No. Leana's not dead!"

Aurel hiccups in the middle of the silence of the night atmosphere. For a moment Aurel felt the universe was too cruel to him. Since childhood he was burdened by the advantages of seeing ghosts, he found it difficult to find a friend who could accept him sincerely. When Aurel finds Leana, the universe shows its cruelty again. In an instant Aurel lost Leana.

Aurel has not had time to apologize for his selfishness and Leana has been gone for ever.

...~To be Continued~...