Semicolons;
Beginnings
Flashback 6 years ago..
“Ayo de ready papah ngajakin to mall.” My mother spoke excitedly.
“OK dehh queen bathei duau ya mah cepet ko inii do not leave lohhh.”
“Iyaa ready princess.” Mamahku.
15 Minutes later..
“Come on I am ready.”
“Yuk down papah already waiting under tuh.”
“Okeyyy.”
In the car…
“Abang can please use this bracelet not, this is what my brother bought for me.” I asked my brother Kaizo Kaneth.
My brother and I are 5 years different, so it's only natural that I'm still spoiled.
“Okay here brother pakein. Oiya mah pah we want to play ice skating right today?.” Ask brother.
“Iya dear play ya later.” My mother said, my father just smiled.
My family was very harmonious at first, our life was happy. Until one day, when papah got a big project that finally made us rich.
We moved to more expensive housing, at first everything went well. Our family has a new ART, driver, gardener, and security guard.
Until one day, my mom found my dad cheating. Yeah, cheating with his secretary. At first, Mamah was just silent, when he tried to ask that thing that he was with from my papah coworkers. My papah just threw the plate into the glass cupboard.
“Bangg mamah same papah why I am afraid bang.” He said while crying.
“You are calm yahh here brother call mba ijah briefly.” Said my brother.
When my brother came out, I peeked up and looked down. There the glass cupboard and its contents had been smashed into pieces, and worse was a lot of blood spots.
From then on, my family was completely destroyed.
Mamah and Papah were not divorced at the time, they were still together but had separated rooms and there was never any more communication between us all.
My mom is busy with her work, and my dad is still cheating here and there. My brother? My brother chose to leave home and go to Singapore because he got a scholarship to study there. Me? Yes, I'm staying at this house.
It feels like the whole house has no occupants. At home, home is just a formality.
Even after, my papah often did not come home for a few days.
Mamahku said to me “saar yes son we will go from this house and mamah will take care of divorce later when you turn 17 years old.”
I, who was a child at the time, could only cry and hope that this was just a dream.
I felt like I was getting worse, especially mentally. Everything feels empty. And I don't think I'm ready to live my days.
I started having mental illnesses like PTSD, depression, panic attack, insomnia, loneliness. From that moment on I also did not believe in love, in my mind, no love ended happily. It will all end just like my papah mama story.
I was cheerful, friendly, open, puffed up and very optimistic. Slowly turned into quiet, closed, lazy to interact, and also jutek, especially to men.
I know that not all men are jerks. But noah, seeing my papah behavior makes me even more hate the figure of a man, and assume that the man is trash.
