Red Merona

05.

That afternoon, the wall clock was 05:00. The discussion of all the problems was finished, finally the meeting was closed. 

Commander High standing up. 

With both hands resting on the table, he turned his gaze, taking turns staring at the faces of all his subordinates.

"Because there is nothing we need to discuss anymore, it seems like this meeting is enough here. Also, do not forget! The fate of our peace is now in your hands. So you have to take care of him even if your lives are at stake!" said Commander High.

The people sitting around the rectangular table immediately stood up, Gotzen was no exception. Then give a salute, sticking the fingers of the right hand near the right eyebrow of their eyes.

"Ready Commander!" yell them simultaneously.

"Alright, now you can go home" Commander High said.

The captains who attended the meeting one by one began to leave the room, not least Gotzen.

"Emi, let's go home" Gotzen asked.

Emi immediately stood up, then followed the steps of her captain.

Arriving outside, Emi and Gotzen immediately approached their horse carriage, then hurried away from the place.

On the way, Gotzen sat facing back, as usual sticking his right elbow into the window hole. He then folded his hand to support his cheek, after which he threw a glance outwards, as if he was enjoying the surrounding scenery. However, from the look of his two eyes it was clear that it was just a blank stare.

Emi who sat face to face always noticed the habit, but Gotzen did not realize that the woman who always hid the gaze behind the glasses, was very concerned about him.

Is it because of love or just ordinary attention. 

I don't know, clearly Emi is a woman who always does good not because of feelings alone, so it is very difficult to guess the contents of her heart.

Before looking at Gotzen's face, Emi turned her face out the window. Without realizing it, he begins to follow Gotzen's habits. 

There were not many things Emi could see that afternoon, as it seemed that it was getting dark. However, the red sky glowed, due to the reflection of the sun's rays that began to sink, it was still clearly visible.

Realizing that, Emi turned her eyes to Gotzen again.

"Captain, it's getting dark, should we stay tonight?"  said Emi.

Yet Gotzen was still asleep in his daydream, the soft voice of the assistant was not enough to break the silence between them.

"Captain, Captain!" Emi also began to raise the volume of her voice.

"Yes, what's going on Emi? I'm sorry, I seemed to be daydreaming." replied Gotzen, turning his gaze toward Emi.

"Captain, should we find a place to stay tonight?" Emi tries to give a suggestion in the form of a question.

"What's really going on? What worries you?" Gotzen asked back.

"It's getting dark. I'm worried about what was discussed at the meeting this afternoon. Didn't he say the Third Division was making a move? So it seems that for now travel at night will be more dangerous" said Emi.

"alright. If you think so." replied Gotzen. He turned around, then slightly opened the front window.

"Please find a nearby inn that has guards!" pinta Gotzen to the adjutant.

"Good captain." replied the aide. Gotzen sat back down.

Soon they stopped at an inn. It was seen that some of the soldiers of the first division were guarding the place.

Not lingering, enter Gotzen and Emi into a room that has many round tables with four chairs. Then Gotzen sat in the corner seat. While Emi goes to the cashier's place "Bu, order two rooms and three portions of dinner. If you can, please make the one that is still warm." afterwards, Emi then follows, sitting on the opposite seat in front of Gotzen. Not far from there one of their aides sat on a chair with a different table.

Emi smiled as she looked at Gotzen's indifferent face, unconcerned by the existence he had in front of her.

"Captain, what's wrong? Why are you daydreaming?" ask Emi, hoping Gotzen will tell you a little.

"It's nothing." Gotzen briefly turned his face to Emi, like there was no intention of saying anything.

"Is the captain still thinking about yesterday's events? Or because of what happened this afternoon?" emi said, still with a sweet smile on her face.

"I don't know what I'm thinking, so I don't know what to say." Gotzen grumbled, annoyed.

"Don't say so captain, at least, there must be one thing weighing on your mind at this time, try to tell me a little." pinta Emi, trying to convince, the smile on his face the more he made it up, the more he made it, although there is no reply. 

"I'm sorry captain." Emi said. His smile slowly faded. He turned away a face filled with sadness and regret. Given Gotzen's kindness all along, it was never thought he would say such a thing.

Emi felt it would be best if Gotzen continued to let out an annoyance at him at this moment. Since the awkward atmosphere between them was no better, it made him want to disappear.

A silence that might widen the distance between them. 

However, Gotzen only fell silent as if he did not care about the feelings of his interlocutor.

Faced with this kind of situation, Emi could only bow while enduring the warmth in her two eyes.

"Maybe you don't know the captain, all this time I've always tried so hard that I'm needed by others, so that I can also be useful to others. But why did the captain say that?" said Emi.

Dugo!! his heart is beating fast.

Eeeeeeh!! 

Gotzen turned his gaze to Emi's face.

What had always been weighing on his mind disappeared instantly, he began to realize and look back at the situation around him.

"I know I'm not a man, I'm weak and I can't help anyone. When faced with an enemy, I was not even able to help myself. All I can do is follow someone else from behind."

emi continued, starting to wipe the water flowing from her two eyeballs. 

Gotzen realizes that he has said something inappropriate to say.During this time he continues to drag on in grief to forget the people around him.

"Even if I realize I'm useless as a soldier, even though I can't defeat the enemy, I hope that one day someone will say that I'm useful, that they need me." emi said, while putting both palms over her cheeks. 

Hearing Emi and seeing her cry, Gotzen was devastated. 

He knows, at this time, if he continues to maintain ego and self-esteem, then he will lose other valuable things.

"Anu,"

"That,"

"Eemie,"

Gotzen tried to say something, but his mouth seemed to be locked tightly. Sometimes he looked at Emi who was still sobbing. His heart is full of regrets. 

"Emi." said Gotzen, he lowered his head, his hands clenched tightly on the table

"I didn't mean it that way, I'm sorry."

"I was wrong, because I kept thinking about my own feelings without caring about your feelings. I'm really sorry I said something that hurt your feelings." continued Gotzen, looking away at Emi.

Emi who heard that immediately opened a gap between her little fingers. He tried to peer into Gotzen's face, causing the two men's gazes to collide. 

Emi who was originally seen crying, now makes a small sound because it is not strong to hold back laughter. Realizing that, the heavy pressure on Gotzen's heart disappeared instantly. The look on his face was calm as before. 

"All right captain! I forgive you!" emi said, surprising Gotzen. He held his head up and wiped the remaining tears with both hands. Emi smiled again, but her eyes and cheeks still looked red and wet, leaving Gotzen feeling embarrassed and sad.

"But!" emi said, holding up her right index finger. 

"Captain don't repeat it again."

"If we lose something precious, we must not continue to grieve or fall. Because if we do that, we'll just lose something valuable." Emi continued.

"Thank you." replied Gotzen, with a smile. He was very embarrassed and very grateful.

Soon the waiter came to deliver dinner for them, it slightly removed the awkwardness between the two.

After Gotzen and Emi finished dinner, they went to their rooms.

when Gotzen opened the door, Emi heard a voice coming from the door of the next room

"Good night captain!" 

Despite only sleeping on a mat bed with a pillow without a bolster, Gotzen was able to sleep well that night, probably because he was exhausted.