Pledge of Love for a Life of Heaven

Non-existent

Mas Surya, a young man who is near perfect. His face was handsome, noble, and religious. Truly, the figure of the priestly candidate whom I have been asking of Him.

"Be the sun that is able to shine the steps of my life, Mas." My hope at that time ....

.....

Without feeling the time is rolling so fast. Two more days when that will come. God-given meeting as the beginning of our love.

For some reason, today a black cloud cloud of tetiba covers the smile of the sun. Accompanied by a flash of lightning striking. What feeling is this? Why does my chest feel tight. My heart is back. This feeling never happened when I lost someone who was so meaningful in my life, the late father and Fadhil.

O Allah, take care and protect those who are dear to you.

"Mbak Anin ...." Asti's greeting broke my daydream.

"Astis? What's up, Dek? Tumben stopped by the kiosk?" the question that came out of my lips was accompanied by a smile. I stared at Asti's condensed bead of eyes, as if implying sorrow.

"Mr ...."

Tetiba Asti hugged me tightly. I feel like there is news he wants to tell you.

"Asti, what's going on? What the hell is going on?"

"Sir, who is patient and sincere!"

Asti's words are getting more and more anxious. I hope, my hunch this time isn't right.

Asti takes off a hug. The eye beads that had originally condensed were now turned into clear wells.

"Mbak, mas Surya accident. Mas Surya .. he .. is gone."

JEGLERERS

Asti's words are like lightning striking my body. I fell silent with the net that was starting to heat up.

I really can't believe Surya's mas is leaving so fast.

"No. .. This is impossible. Surya is still alive. He promised to see me. He has prepared everything to welcome the relationship that will be established. This is impossible, God ...."

The pain of losing the figure of Surya mas, thousands of times more than the pain that ever greeted.

"Sunya, let go of the car," asked Asti while embracing my body that felt lifeless.

"As, Surya's still alive. He's just gone for a while and will be back."

"Mhrs .... Anin has to be strong. The strong one, Ma'am! Mas Surya is really gone and will never come back again. Ma'am, Allah loves Surya more."

O Robb, how great are my sins, that Thou hast condemned me for many years. The happiness that had just greeted now changed.

"It's better for Anin to die, ma'am." The words that come out of my lips, as an expression of despair over destiny that has been written in His book.

"Nin, Istighfar Ndhuk! Please don't say that. Your life path is long. Expose what is gone. Believe me, one day the mother's daughter .. will meet a better soul mate. Nin, God's will is the best."

"But Ma'am, if His will is the best, why does He always take away what Anin wants to embrace? Why does He always make sorrow?"

My mother hugged my body tightly. He was trying to strengthen his fragile daughter. "Nin, God never gives a test beyond the limits of His servant's ability. Rest assured, after the storm of testing that always hits, there will be happiness that never expected."

"Mother .. forgive Anin. Forgive the mother's daughter's weakness of faith." My body shook violently accompanied by the roar of tears of sorrow that increasingly flowed.

....

The night is late. But both my eyes refused to close. The barrage of tests that came after each other changed like a replayed movie.

Should I give in to a love destiny that never takes sides?

Should I stop dreaming beautiful dreams?

Should I choose to say goodbye to this mortal world?

Despite trying to stay strong and tough in the face of reality that never harmonizes with despair, in fact.

Since Surya died, every night .. My eyes are hard closed. Can only be shut down after prostrating to Him in one third of the night and chanting love.

"Nin, the time has come. Go back to the realm of eternity."

I tried to shake off the voices that were out of nowhere. My body trembled, my breath as if it were going to run out. I feel like my life is going to escape from my body.

"No. Not now, Robb. What will be the fate of mother, Asti, and Azizah when I go."

I continue to fight with the intangible substance. Until the sweat flooded the whole body.

Could it be that the moment has arrived???

In the deckap rumukuh, I lay on the prayer mat with breath that began to be regular even though my whole body was cold and felt weak.

Not just once or twice, I feel like this life will be detached from the body. I keep trying to stay alive because of the promise that once swelled. My promise to the late father who until now has not been able to fulfill. Protect, protect, and paint smiles on the faces of my mother and two sisters.

....

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Apologies if scattered typo 😊🙏