My Haluku is my Destiny

THIS FEELING TORTURES ME

 mita looked at the ceiling of her room with mixed feelings. The child lost by accident, is he still so important to both his parents or his brothers and sisters? But Mita could not see if she had a suadara. \ 

In the morning a bright and beautiful Mita exhales tired. “still mita morning! Geez” mita said to herself.

Then she got up and sat down and prayed first.

“god mita is grateful for this beautiful morning, mita is grateful god has taken care and visited mita. Mita will take care and join mita, in the name of the Lord Jesus hallelujah, amen.” Then mita got up and folded the blanket and tidied up the pillows.

Sounding knock from outside. “mita has woken mother” said mita.

“ you okay son? If you still want to rest mother allow to go to school” said mother Jesika worried.

“ mita is okay mother” said mita smiling open

room door.

Jesika stroking the top of mita's head. “ yes already there shower”.

“good bunda” after that mita closed her room door and walked towards the bathroom.

Now Mita has finished wearing her school uniform and sits at her mini dresser and looks at herself in the mirror reflection in front of her. “ all will be well” mita took her comb and started combing her beautiful hair slowly.she did not want a guava like last night.

Mita breathed out in anger trying to dive into her heart and mind that did not go together. Mita began to curl her hair but there was no visible smile on her face.

“ tiring” mita turned to stare at her doll. Then Mita stood up and ran over to her doll and hugged her.

Mita drowned her face on her doll,

close his mouth tightly. The rumble in his heart grew bigger and bigger, we clenched his hands withstanding the turmoil on him. “ a-I am a-ku well-b-any” the shoulder began to tremble as if it was about to collapse its defenses.

“ ak-u ba-ik b-ayak” he said again holding the tension.

Knock the door heard from outside mita did not answer him because he did not want to answer it. “ son?” call jesika from outside.

There is no answer from mita. “ cry son, and after that never remember it and feel it again. There are still fathers and mothers for you, there are still friends who love you. Be happy son even when the circumstances want to drop you”.

“what a p-feeling this!” mita banging her chest.“sesak”she added again. Mita no longer held back her crying, the crying echoed throughout the room a heart-wrenching cry.

“ I don't know what to do now, I tangent, I a-I don't know what to do” mita curled up hugging her knees while crying. Suddenly a memory appeared in the head of the mita.

Little Mita running fast with her two little legs chasing two boys who are bigger than her. “ come on deck sooner later brother stayin loh”ucap a boy dressed in a black shirt.

```

“hahahaha, you are too small” another boy dressed in a white shirt laughed at him.

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Mita tightened her arms on both knees.

“caka repeat itakan little maci should ita enang dong” said little mita menjaju on her two brothers.

Mita's breath began to be irregular considering the events. Mita tried to reach her cellphone which was not far from her, but did not arrive.

“ ita healthy-healthy continue yes, so can play with sister again” said boy in black shirt. “caka want te where?”little mita asked sadly.

The boy in the black shirt just smiled and

hugging his sister. “ ita same brother liam ya , brother Odan want to meet brother el. Dadada ita” after saying that the boy ran and did not turn around again.

“cakaaaa...caakaaa ita follow” mita running chase even though it continues to fall. “caka j-angan, i-ta -ikut” mita fell to the blood but continued to look at the brother who ran away.

“kakak..” mita squeezes her chest strong memories that are too painful for her.

“smart mother, already yes son do not cry and we follow your sister, may still have time” said a woman who embraced mita.

“unda c-aka ja-hat ca-ma ita” mita continues to cry even when treated mita just crying and not moaning in pain.

“ milord mistress let her car be ready”.

“ bangaimana if later liam will leave too? Just think about it dizzy father” said a middle-aged man who was so charismatic.

“ return one of them well, so that ita also there are guard and accompany” said the woman."everything is being educated well, Do not make a liam must go too" he added

The man exhaled. “ later father will think”.

Sounded a tight knock from the outside. “mita? mita?” call Jesika hard from outside.

“ SIR!! HER REM MISTRESS IS NOT WORKING!”shouted a driver who was driving the car.

“ bangaimana bangaimana this” said the woman hugged her two children.

“ unda why”tanya mita smile at her mother.

“it's okay anyway, here sister hugs” mita releases her hug on her mother and hugs her brother. The car started out of control.

“lord forgive me, madam forgive me, I neglected to check the state of mobil” said the driver tried as much as possible to control the car.

“ don't lower the speed! If so we will retreat backwards could be more dangerous!” the man's orders were worried while paying attention to the circumstances behind the car.

“sad that there are trucks and buses from the top and bottom” the man turned and looked back and looked towards the turning road that they could see from the position of the car now.

“tuan both vehicles do not slow down the speed instead speed it”.

```

“mita want you to sleep” the sound of jesika sounding back incense on the ears mita.

“unda-ita idak mau” said mita with a small voice and vibrate.

Mita saw it again a forgotten memory.

```

“forgive me dear, it's all because of me. I should have asked the escort”the man hugged his wife and two children tightly.

“pak hit his car on the crossroads”soff the man with confidence.

“baik tuan”

When the bus and truck were close as if to squeeze the car quickly the driver slammed the steering wheel quickly until the bus and truck hit hard. The car that the happy family was riding quickly hit the road cross until the car was destroyed.

A little boy was thrown out through the windshield. The grip and the hug came off. The shadow of his two masters who did not move and bleed and his older brother who went with him was thrown but the driver was still able to catch the end of his brother's clothes.

“itaaaa”pap the boy was weak when he could not reach his sister's hand.

Dark, cold, pain. Mita began to shiver feeling that memory, the sense of helplessness she saw made her voice choked to answer her screaming thunderously calling out to her.

“this is the memory that” mita can not breathe. “they are injured, m-are they are injured ka-rena a-ku. I-I yeah-ng made it sort of like this. Forgive me bu-nda a-yah” continued mita crying with consciousness that began to disappear.

The door was broken into the eyes of the man wearing a black shirt who stood with his breath heaving and felt everything blurry in the absence of voices calling him again just the voices of those he missed.

“ita let's eat mother already cooked loh”.

“ita don't run away brother el tired" a little boy dressed in a white shirt was chasing a girl who was so sweet.

"we sister willi go first yes, you do not misbehave to hear with brother odan and brother el, dadada ita" a child waved his hand in school uniform.

“it's okay, here brother huk”

“ita same sister willi ya , brother Odan want to meet brother el. Dadada ita”

“ brother odan, sister comes yes?” after that mita closed her eyes while looking at a man in a black shirt who was walking towards her in a hurry.

“iya sister comes dear”