Darkened

insurgents

"I have suffered so much in this life, Lord, please do not test more than this" I said, ending my prayer tonight.

Shown all day what I have been through, do not feel my tears dripping again.

I quickly removed it with both hands.

"I must not be weak, I must be strong".

I said in my heart, laying down on a worn bamboo mat.

I feel so tired, my back hurts so much.

I slept for a moment too.

The morning ,

the sound of the neighbor's chicken woke me up.

I woke up and opened my eyes ,

"It's always dark, whether you open your eyes or not it makes no difference to me" I said in my heart.

Yes, I am a blind man.

When I was a kid I had an accident.

I was hit by an irresponsible motorist.

He ran away after seeing me lying on the street.

I could only cry out for help weakly, and then be unconscious.

I was helped by some of the residents, and took me to the nearest hospital.

When I heard the doctor say I lost my eyesight in the accident, my heart was broken.

I screamed hysterically and hit in all directions.

everything was dark, pitch black, nothing to me.

My world seems to have stopped.

"Why didn't God just take my life away from me then ?" I don't feel my tears dripping anymore.

It was always like this when I remembered that dark past.

I got up and looked for my wand, usually I lay it behind the door.

I walked to my neighbor's public toilet.

Because my house is just a reot hut made of bamboo.

Very small, measuring 6 x 6 square meters.

With a precarious that's been creeping, and leaking everywhere when it rains.

Never mind having a bathroom, my house is just enough for me to sleep.

This alone is the relic of the only granny who took care of me all this time.

Because I meet a lot of street children who have no place to live.

And they sleep in people's shop's offices or under bridges.

" Hey, if you want to take a shower here it pays 'em ,

it's so good you want a free bath, you think it's your ancestors' bathroom haaa ? "

The voice of my neighbor named nining , who snapped broke my daydream.

I'm used to being treated like this.

I fell silent and nodded ,

" I'm sorry ma'am, but I don't have any money" I said slowly.

" Therefore dong if the work is enterprising, do not be lazy just "snaps bu nining again while passing away.

I stepped into the bathroom, I moved slowly2 while crying.

" May my newspaper sell out today" I murmured.

I am a newspaper seller. I used to sell my wares at the crossroads of the big road.

Oh yes, I haven't introduced myself.

My name is Citra, complete image of the gem.

I'm an orphan.

My mother's father died when I was 5 in a plane crash.

And all my property was taken by my own crazy uncle.

There are no relatives anymore, because all I have are uncles and aunts.

Even now I don't remember their faces anymore 'cause almost 15 years old never met.

Now I'm 20 years old, living a day by selling newspapers to make a living.

Just one dream right now 'em ,

hopefully someday I will find true love that does not look at my physical and my shortcomings.

A man who can accept me for who I am.

But is there such a man today ??

I always believed God would show me the way of happiness someday.

Somehow.